Team

Is it Time to Take Off the Training Wheels?

Helping new leaders work through their fears and launch

Getting ready

Remember when you first rode a bike? I do. On my street in Lincoln, Nebraska all the other kids were doing it. I wanted to join them. Struggling to keep my balance it was clear I would not succeed alone.

I knew I had what it took so like many children my parents installed training wheels for me so I could work on my balance. I did this for weeks. Up and down the street. As soon as I got home from school each day, I would ride.

Ride, ride, ride. I’m not sure I was getting better, but I was getting tired. Dedicated to achieving the goal. Now, desperately wanting to ride my bicycle without training wheels. At the same time, I was a bit scared of falling.

I was afraid. Something new was about to happen. Fear was my response.

Receiving the support

My dad was a tremendous support during this time and his mere presence gave me the confidence to find the courage to take the next step. I leaned on him. He was a steady man; quiet and sure.

Taking the first step

As I launched out on my own without training wheels he held on to the back seat of my bike to provide support. I peddled with all of my might and tried to keep my balance; wobbly as I was. I still remember those first times and what it felt like to be out of balance. Without his help holding on I would fall. As I got faster I would break away from his guidance. I did fall. I was okay.

Then… one day as he held on to the seat, I thought I had pulled away, but that wasn’t the case. Instead, he let go and guess what?

I was off riding down the street all by myself!

What to do with fear?

Just as riding my bike without training wheels didn’t happen in a day, neither does becoming a leader. It is our job to do new things. It is okay to feel fear.

Whenever I feel fearful today, I think about a quote from Steven Pressfield who wrote,

“Fear is good. Like self-doubt, fear is an indicator. Fear tells us what we have to do.” ~ Steven Pressfield

As we recognize it and understand our role and responsibility we know what we need to do. We lean into the fear and help others too.

What could go wrong?

Today I see many teams wanting to take their training wheels off too soon. They feel they are ready. Because they can carry a load, they are tempted to shun the counsel of their leadership.

Sadly, I see some teams fall and hurt themselves. They hurt their clients and their peers. Full of confidence, ambition, and passion; they think they can conquer any obstacles.

I think they will; one day. Probably not today.

Experienced leaders have a responsibility to help guide them. Help them avoid the most devastating pitfalls allowing them to grow into healthy people. Those prepared to serve others, bring the change we need, and enable them to fulfill their dreams.

Our future leaders pushing too hard early on can hinder their growth and delay their future impact. It doesn’t have to be that way.

While new leaders and teams need the opportunity to fail we need to encourage them to bring us along. That way we can help steady them as they are learning.

Becoming their support

We can help. We do this through building relationships of trust where they invite us into their decision-making process; how they think. When they respect us and see our motivation is to help, they may share what they intend to do so we can ask questions and even give guidance.

Respect opens the door to invitation.

Perhaps if we respect them a bit more they might invite us in.

Conclusion

Becoming a leader others want to follow includes receiving guidance, desire, and practice. Fear is part of maturing. Fear can even propel us to greater success. There is a natural time to take the training wheels off; when they are no longer needed and limit our growth. Once we have our training wheels off, we are in the best position to help our team remove theirs.

Shepherding is the art of becoming the leader others want to follow.