Summary

A man at a transitional housing shelter reflects on an encounter with a woman who sought his attention, contrasting his perspective of her actions with her own self-perception, and contemplates the broader implications of seeking validation through casual sexual encounters.

Abstract

The narrative unfolds in Minneapolis, where the author, residing at a transitional housing facility, encounters a woman who approaches him with apparent sexual interest. Despite her attempts at seduction, which he finds off-putting, he remains disinterested and dismissive. The woman's behavior, which the author perceives as a pattern of seeking self-worth through sexual conquests, prompts him to reflect on the deeper issues of low self-esteem and the fleeting nature of pleasure derived from sex, alcohol, and drugs. He contrasts his own hopeful outlook, bolstered by his relationship with Olivia, with the woman's apparent lack of hope and direction. The author concludes with advice to young people, urging them to avoid cheapening their self-worth and to focus on personal growth and a brighter future instead of transient pleasures.

Opinions

The author perceives the woman's behavior as a reflection of low self-worth and a misguided attempt to find validation.
He believes that the woman's actions, driven by a need for sexual attention, are profoundly sad and indicative of a larger issue of hopelessness.
The author is critical of the idea of seeking temporary pleasure through casual sex, alcohol, and drugs, viewing it as detrimental to one's future.
He acknowledges the role of personal support, such as his relationship with Olivia, in helping him maintain a positive outlook and avoid such behaviors.
The author advocates for personal development, skill acquisition, and abstinence from illicit substances and casual sex as means to a fulfilling life.
He suggests that the woman's approach to seeking companionship is ineffective and that she should reevaluate her actions for a more meaningful life.

She Thought She Was a Sex Goddess, but I thought she was gross

The encounter made me sad

It was a beautiful summer day in Minneapolis. I was sitting on a bench in the park on the property of the Transitional Housing facility where I was staying.

I was minding my business. I often sat alone, and I liked it that way, but the blond was lonely, or she was suffering through an hour-long dry spell.

She thought she was a coquette, but I wasn’t interested

She sat down next to me, a doughy-looking woman. I’m a big guy, I have no issues with overweight women, but she was gross. I had watched her go through countless guys the two years I was at the shelter.

She looked at me and batted her eyes. “ Hi, can I sit here?” She asked with a saccharine voice. I nodded yes and she sat down and gave me the look that had seduced countless guys.

I ignored her, hoping she would go away

She started talking. I can’t tell you what she said, because I wasn’t listening. Enough words were getting through that I knew she was trying to get into my pants. She was irritated because I was making her work for it.

She gave up after several long minutes. She got up and walked away. I chuckled and took out my phone to give Olivia a call. I told her everything that happened.

We laughed about and talked a few more minutes, then I hung up the phone and enjoyed the rest of a beautiful day.

It was funny, but it was profoundly sad

The whole thing was funny, but it was sad too. Her self-worth was so low that she needed to throw herself at men. I don’t know if she was looking for love, or she only wanted sex.

I feel bad for people like her. I wanted to tell her that she didn’t need to lie down with every man that would have her. I wanted to tell her that she was still young and that there was still time to get off the road she was on.

I knew anything I said would fall on deaf ears. I ignored her and she got up to find a willing guy.

How do you help people that have given up?

How do you help people who don’t have hope for tomorrow? their only focus is on the transitory pleasures they find in sex and booze and drugs.

I couldn’t do that. I was always thinking about the future with Olivia. I can’t judge though. Would I have stayed on the straight and narrow if I didn’t have Olivia to talk to every day?

She encouraged me and prayed for me. If I didn’t have her support to lean on, I know my life would have been a lot different now.

Look at what you’re doing, if it’s holding you back, get rid of it

What I’m trying to tell young people is, don’t give it away so cheaply. Discard everything that might jeopardize your future. There’s more to life than synthetic highs and easy sex. It might be fun at that moment, but you will have regrets later.

Final thought:

Mistakes compound and the consequences are not pleasant. Develop skills, earn a living and leave the illicit chemicals alone, and don’t give up your body so cheaply.

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