FICTION

She Shared Her Devastating Secrets

Ebony knew she had to tell Burke, or it would forever stand between them

From the first moment Ebony had seen Burke, he had intrigued her. Her body reacted to him — The Commander — even when she sat at her desk and only thought of him.

It’s the first time since…

Ebony shook her head, not wanting her thoughts to go there.

After that disastrous night with one of his men, Ebony and Burke had been out for dinner several times. With him commanding a submarine and forever somewhere deep in the ocean, their dating couldn’t be called regular. Or even normal. Sometimes weeks went by without Ebony hearing from him.

Sometimes while he was away, she wished he was in bed with her, but mostly she was okay with their occasional evenings together.

Not in bed, though.

The last time they went out for dinner, Burke almost took her to bed.

Almost.

Their kissing had been so intense, and their bodies so incredibly close together, yearning for each other. Every fiber of her body wanted him. His hand had lowered to her breast, and at that moment she moaned and pressed herself against him.

Her intention was clear.

Until it wasn’t.

She had almost cried at the confusion in Burke’s eyes, but couldn’t tell him what was wrong. Ebony had jumped up to refill their glasses. Her body screamed in protest, wanting to be with him, but her mind just couldn’t allow it.

Where she now sat at her desk, she thought of the night ahead.

Once more, she and Burke had made plans to go out for dinner. Ebony knew they would end up at her apartment again.

She wanted that.

And she knew what she had to do.

She had to trust him with her secret — two, really — or it will forever stand between them.

Ebony and Burke had just finished a three-course meal and were now sitting opposite each other. Ebony stirred her tea while Burke took a sip of his black coffee and gazed at her over the cup.

“Ebony,” he said on a serious note, “we don’t have to go back to your place. I don’t want you to feel pressured. I’m a patient ma…”

“I want you to.”

I want you to come home with me.

Of course that was what she meant, but she also wanted to say: I want you to make love to me.

Back at her place, Ebony poured each of them a glass of red wine, needing a bit of liquid courage. As soon as she sat down next to Burke, he pulled her into his embrace. She rested her head against his chest and breathed in deeply.

“Burke, there’s something I have to tell you.”

He tightened his arm around her and kissed the top of her head.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

“I want to.”

It was quiet for a while, as Ebony gathered up the strength to tell him her story. Burke just held her, waiting patiently for her to be ready to talk.

“Fifteen years ago, when I was sixteen…”

She stopped, breathed in again.

“I was sixteen when one night I walked back home after training. I had walked that road a million times, and it was always safe.”

She closed her eyes, and once again took a deep breath.

“Not that night.”

A shiver ran through the length of her body, and Burke again kissed the top of her head, his arm still tightly around her.

Ebony’s voice quivered when she talked again.

“They waited for me. Three of them. Pulled me into an alley. Covered my head. Left me there afterwards.”

A tear trickled over her cheek and landed on Burke’s shirt.

“I never saw their faces. They didn’t speak. All three…”

Ebony sniffed, now allowing tears to run freely.

“Nine months later… I don’t know if it was a boy or a girl. Adopted.”

Burke scooped Ebony into his lap, his arms circling her, holding her tightly while she sobbed. He didn’t speak, didn’t react to her cryptic story, and she didn’t want him to. She just wanted him to know what had happened, to understand why physical contact might be difficult for her.

It was an hour later that Ebony lay in Burke’s arms, on the couch, both of them still fully clothed.

When her tears had finally stopped, Burke had tilted her head and kissed her deeply. Not once did he push her to talk, but safe in his arms, Ebony found her voice and told him the entire story.

The attack on Ebony and the consequent sexual assault by three men had happened in a spot where there was no CCTV, evident of a meticulous planning. Everyone the police interviewed had an alibi and could prove it.

When they discovered the pregnancy, it was already too late for an abortion. Ebony went to a convent, where the baby was born, and handed to the adoptive parents. Ebony didn’t want to know the sex of the baby, or the name of the adoptive parents.

She had never viewed the baby as hers.

For many years after the incident and giving birth, Ebony received intensive psychological care.

“I’m okay, really,” she had promised Burke. Seeing the doubt in his eyes, she had explained: “Yes, the tears are for what happened, but also because I fear you will leave. I will understand if you do.”

That was when he pulled her closer and whispered into her hair: “I’m going nowhere.”

They kissed, and soon after, ended up on the couch.

Ebony tilted her head towards Burke’s and, for the umpteenth time, they kissed.

“I want you to make love to me,” Ebony said when their lips parted.

“Not tonight,” Burke said. “Soon, but not tonight.”

Ebony knew he meant it. Knew he wouldn’t just disappear on her. She rested her head on his shoulder again, content to just be with him.

“Thank you for trusting me, Ebony,” Burke said when he kissed her at the door later.

Burke was in her life to stay, and they would make love when the moment was perfect.

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