Self

Shattering the Story that Stress is Really Bad for You

Without it we’d be zombies

Let’s face it — there’s good stress and bad stress.

I’m not saying the seesaw between our fight-or-flight reaction (the sympathetic nervous system) and our rest and relax response (the parasympathetic nervous system) has to be stationary.

There’s no fun in sitting on a stationary seesaw.

I liken Life to an ocean, with waves on the surface which can be turbulent or gentle, while a deep calm and stillness rests at the bottom.

Our everyday lives occur on the surface.

We confront the daily demands of work, family, deadlines, decisions, studying, technology; these all create physiological responses in our bodies.

When the pressure’s on, our stress levels rise — the adrenal glands pump that cortisol and our heart rate goes up; we breathe faster.

Is that good for you?

It depends on our definition of stress.

“I’m so stressed,” you say to yourself.

Then you continue with words, thoughts and images prompted by your belief stress is ALWAYS bad for you. You lose focus. You make mistakes. You miss that deadline. You lose your temper.

Then you accept the fallout as a justification of how you see yourself — you always mess up. And the cycle of harmful stress continues.

Do you believe you have to work on eliminating it altogether (the zombie option) because stress will kill you? And your failure to do that reflects how incompetent you are?

Yet some individuals excel under pressure.

Why is that?

Because they love the challenge. They don’t perceive it as threatening or dangerous. They believe they can do it.

“You can’t always control what goes on outside, but you can always control what goes on inside.” — Dr. Wayne Dyer

Let’s deal with the stress

I viewed a TED talk by health psychologist Kelly McGonigal in which she quotes a study that tracked 30,000 adults in the United States over eight years.

The crucial point was people didn’t die prematurely from stress itself, but from believing stress was bad for them. It was what they thought about stress that had the biggest impact on their health.

McGonigal says “When you change your mind about stress, you can change your body’s response to stress … your body believes you, and your stress response becomes healthier.”

She shares another study conducted at Harvard University where participants were coached to regard their stress responses as helpful.

• Your pounding heart is preparing you for action
• Your faster breathing is getting more oxygen to your brain

We can tick the boxes on our pounding heart and faster breathing being beneficial.

Yay!

But one fundamental physiological difference emerged.

In a typical stress response, our blood vessels constrict. Hence, we associate chronic stress with cardiovascular disease. But the blood vessels of the participants stayed relaxed because they perceived their stress response as helpful!

One more thing

In my research on stress, I made a mind-blowing discovery.

I’ve always identified the neurochemical oxytocin as the cuddle hormone. I associate it with hugs, love, trust and empathy.

What I didn’t realize was oxytocin is also a stress hormone! Our pituitary gland pumps it out in response to stress.

Oxytocin triggers us to hook up with others when we stress! The action of seeking comfort or support from another, or offering care and encouragement to others, then generates more!

I hope this information has shattered your beliefs about stress and you can now welcome it as a friend.

(And please don’t skip a daily visit to the deeps of the ocean.)

Thank you for being here.

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