Sex with Animals and the Underage: Disturbing Markers of Manhood in Colombia

San Antero: where the term “ass play” takes on a whole other meaning.

“Any self-respecting man around here will have had sex with a donkey, for sure. I lost my virginity to one. It was her first time too.”

Folks, if you’re of a sensitive disposition, just know that there are going to be some uncomfortable themes referenced in this article. As you can tell from the title, the subject matter is both disturbing and infuriating.

If you’ve read any of my other articles, you’ll know by now that I love to tackle the patriarchy and investigate how damaging it is to both men and women.

As you’ll soon see, this topic is further proof of that.

I intend to be as discreet as possible for the sake of reader comfort — I’m not one to go into unnecessary detail in the name of gratuitous lascivity, but no matter how you slice it, this topic will always feel like something akin to a fever dream.

I came across a documentary recently that focused on a rural region in north Colombia and one of the more peculiar facets of their way of life.

In the small village of San Antero, located just over 100 miles from Cartagena, there is a questionable social practice among men that dates back to pre-Columbian times:

Sexual intercourse with donkeys.

While extremely disturbing from an outside perspective, apparently, this is an age-old tradition that is widely accepted among communities in the area.

There’s nothing taboo or hush-hush about it — it’s considered one of many normal sexual experiences males often have on their laundry list. It’s highly encouraged, even.

And the social underpinnings of such a practice are what we’re going to investigate today.

Like in many cultures around the world, sex, and more importantly, the notion of virginity, differs greatly between boys and girls. Boys are encouraged to do away with theirs as early as possible and girls are encouraged to do exactly the opposite.

Chastity, while honoured by the females in the community, is largely sidestepped by their male counterparts.

The conditioning of boys to be virile and sexually active from pre-adolescence creates a largely unbalanced social dynamic — virtuous young women encouraged to abstain for as long as possible and sexually frustrated young men looking for an outlet.

As a consequence, it’s customary for boys to have their very first sexual experience with a female donkey.

While this may appear to be a rudimentary solution to a sexual supply and demand issue, in reality, it’s a practice that is shrouded in a variety of cultural beliefs:

The Kággabba — the indigenous group local to the area — believe that sex with donkeys is what guarantees male sexual competence in marriage. It is encouraged as a means of ensuring that a boy will grow to be a proficient lover for his future wife.

It is also credited as a means of fostering proper psychosexual development in young boys. The idea is that it “prevents their semen from travelling up to their heads and making them crazy,” according to an exploratory study conducted by UNAD.

One man, of around middle age, told the reporters of a VICE documentary that doctors used to recommend sex with donkeys when he was younger because they believed it helped to elongate a man’s penis.

It is also promoted to prevent other behaviours that are deemed socially unacceptable, such as drug use or homosexuality.

In other words, it’s preferable for a man to abuse an animal than to engage in mutually consensual behaviours for sexual gratification.

Consent, or lack thereof, is a big motivating factor behind the proclivity of bestiality. Animals don’t possess the faculties to understand what’s going on and to, therefore, express consent. So, men are able to bypass that step with much greater ease.

Sexologist Dr Hani Miletski says “They call it ‘mind games…with people, you have to figure out what they want while the animal is right there.”

The zoophilic predilections of these men aren’t the only cause for concern.

Don’t get me wrong, I consider bestiality to be a perversion of the highest order, and I think anyone who engages in animal cruelty of any kind deserves the electric chair.

However, what I also find truly terrifying is the generalised belief that a boy simply cannot become a man unless he has sexual relations with a donkey.

That is the price to pay for boys to feel accomplished and affirmed in their masculinity.

And not only that — how young the boys in question are, too.

Almost 70% of all 47 males participating in this study confessed to having had intercourse with a donkey between the ages of 7 and 30.

No, that’s not a typo.

Seven.

Masculinity has reached such levels of toxicity that pre-pubescent boys as young as seven are being conditioned to not only be aware of what sex is but to actively practice it at that age, with animals.

According to the NCSBY, puberty normally starts at around the age of 10. This means that these boys are incentivized to engage in sexual activity a good few years before their sexual characteristics even become biologically established.

If that’s not totally sickening, I don’t know what is.

This is a clear example of the nefariousness of the patriarchy and the ways in which it not only harms women but men too. And, frankly, it’s disgusting.

Why are people inflicting these harmful adult ideologies on innocent children (and animals) in the name of manhood?

Are little boys not allowed to just… be? Without the imposition of these ideals on the only years of innocence they’re ever going to have in their lifetime?

What’s also problematic is that this behaviour isn’t just a kink — it’s a yardstick. A measure of manliness. A twisted and scrupleless way of pitting young boys against each other and weaponising what’s truly important to them — their masculinity.

This means that in order to preserve their reputation in the eyes of others, they’re conditioned to put their mental and physical health at risk by committing these atrocities.

It means that their very notion of childhood is extinguished not long after it begins.

And it also means that even those who aren’t enthusiastic about it will no doubt succumb to social pressure and conform to avoid being ostracised by their peers.

Peer pressure is implemented to bring about actions that affirm, strengthen and/or test individuals’ affiliations with certain groups. It’s a mighty beast to wrangle with and can often lead to negative consequences for those who attempt to counteract it.

So not only can the animal not consent, but neither can the child. It’s just a deplorable situation all around.

As prevalent as these practices may be, one thing that is woefully under-addressed is their psychological implications.

This study posits that bestiality can produce:

• physical and sexual inadequacies
• emotional and sexual immaturity
• difficulty in emotional attachment
• internalised hostility
• voyeuristic tendencies and infantile social behaviour
• inability to delay gratification of impulses
• lack of empathy
• less conscientiousness and less sensitivity to criticism

to name a few examples.

Yet, all that is overlooked thanks to this strange obsession with performative masculinity that has pervaded patriarchal societies.

Advocating for these uncivilised practices is giving rise to a community of psychologically defunct individuals.

Ones that continue to propagate these rituals and cause the destruction of future generations as a result. It’s a warped and vicious cycle for the men and boys who fall victim to this conditioning.

As someone with an avid interest in social anthropology, there’s nothing I enjoy more than the opportunity to delve into the workings of a community. I find it fascinating to observe how people live.

But this particular discovery has had a significant impact on me. To put it less diplomatically, it left me feeling psychologically assaulted, powerless, and incredibly frustrated.

What’s mildly reassuring is that the figures indicate an increasing loss of prevalence as time goes by. Over a 14-year period, the stats show a 47.7% decrease in the practice of bestiality.

So, what was once the sexual MO of men in these communities is now being fazed out incrementally as modernisation creeps in.

Thank heavens for small mercies, I suppose.

While I believe that dismantling the patriarchy is a mammoth task that goes far beyond simply addressing it on Medium or complaining about it over lunch with friends, there are actionable steps we can take to make sure we’re not disseminating its harmfulness through our everyday behaviours.

Let’s start by examining our notions of masculinity and making sure that we’re not imposing — consciously or otherwise — harmful ideals upon the boys and men around us.

Then we can start thinking about a real battle plan as a collective.

For more content like this, check out my other Musings here!

Thank you very much for reading! If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to leave them below.

*Some quotes have been redacted for clarity.

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