Sex Addiction Doesn’t Give you Permission to be Predatory

Summary

The article argues that sex addiction is not an acceptable justification for predatory behavior, emphasizing personal accountability and the need to address societal norms that enable such conduct.

Abstract

The article "Sex Addiction Doesn’t Give you Permission to be Predatory" critically examines the use of sex addiction as a defense for harmful and predatory actions, particularly in light of recent celebrity scandals. It highlights the societal tendency to excuse bad behavior under the guise of addiction, using James Franco's case as an example. While acknowledging that individuals like Franco may show signs of learning and accepting consequences, the author stresses that this does not absolve them of their actions. The #MeToo movement is referenced as a double-edged sword, bringing attention to sexual misconduct but also leading to backlash against victims. The article underscores the importance of recognizing the profound impact of sexual assault on victims and the necessity for abusers to understand their actions cannot be justified by their desires. It concludes by calling for an end to excusing behavior with claims of sex addiction, advocating for personal responsibility and the containment of one's actions.

Opinions

Sex addiction should not be used as a blanket excuse for predatory behavior.
Society's acceptance of sex addiction as a rationale for misconduct is problematic and enables harmful behavior.
The #MeToo movement has raised awareness but also faced criticism and skepticism, with some falsely inflating the rate of false rape allegations.
Sexual assault has long-lasting effects on victims, beyond just a loss of trust, and reconciliation is complex.
Claiming sex addiction is often a cop-out for individuals who prioritize self-gratification over the well-being of others.
The expectation of self-

Sex Addiction Doesn’t Give you Permission to be Predatory

Is this obvious? Does attraction somehow automatically provide you permission to be a stain of society? Apparently so. Or at least according to Hollywood it does. Time and time again we see “sex addiction” as the cause for horrendous behavior. In the most latest sex crave as the answer to one’s misdoings, we see James Franco, a beloved comedian of the 2000s scale back on his behavior as a professor due to ignorance and sex addiction.

There’s a number of reasons he provides and I’m not saying he isn’t learning but it’s just so convenient for society to allow this type of behavior to begin with. In Franco’s case, his friend, and frequent collaborator, Seth Rogan opted to speak out and stop working with him. Franco acknowledged and accepted this as a proper consequence of his own action’s — accountability. But what about those who don’t show any remorse?

Everyone is familiar with #MeToo. The movement has spawned the downfall for many but also backlash for just as many victims. In many cases it’s seen an reprisal of the idea that women simply lie about being raped. Although this has happened, and will continue to happen, statistically it’s about 8–10% of rape allegations are false. That’s a blip in comparison to how many people are harmed.

Rape isn’t just sexual assault, which in itself is it’s own inexcusable act, it comes with ramifications that might not ever go away. It’s not just a lack of trust, it’s a fundamental reorientation with one’s understanding of the world. Reconciliation with an abuser goes beyond accepting an apology, it’s understanding how your own part as a victim wouldn’t have changed your abuser’s actions to begin with. That’s something that might not ever be understood.

Sex addiction as a cop out is an explanation for behavior that shouldn’t be justified. You can enjoy something but not have permission to enjoy it. Just because you want it doesn’t mean you’re allowed to have it. You can find literal lists curated to celebrities who have claimed sex addiction for their behaviors. These behaviors can go anywhere from cheating, drug use, to full out assault. It’s not an explanation, it’s an excuse. At the end of the day, it’s not the sex addiction that pushes predatory behavior — it’s the expectation of self gratification. Just because a predator wants to use someone doesn’t provide them permission to take it.

And yet people will run with it. They just can’t help themselves. How can one be expected to act properly when they’re biologically structured to just breed and breed? Isn’t that what being human is about? People have needs. No, that’s stupid. And laying it out like that just shows how stupid that thinking is. You have urges, fine, you don’t have to act on those urges. Everyone wants something. That doesn’t mean I’m allowed to quit my job and just start robbing stores because I don’t feel like working.

It’s a convenient excuse for a stupid expectation. Sex addiction or need is something can be contained. If you don’t have sex you don’t start frothing at the mouth and jumping on your next victim. You just don’t get to have sex.

We need to stop allowing people to get away from excusing their behaviors. Even with someone like Franco who seems to regret his actions it doesn’t actually explain the root of his problem. He just abused his position, that’s it. It’s not because he’s addicted to sex, that’s just a footnote about his history. What he did was disregard his role as a leader and allowed himself to indulge in his own wants without thinking about the larger picture.

I’m not saying he isn’t learning, what I am saying is that you can’t give a stupid excuse for your own actions. Own up to your mistakes. We all make them. Regardless of the gravity of them you still need to take responsibility. This isn’t some fiction narrative where your backstory excuses your history, you’re responsible for your actions, regardless of your original intent.