DIRECTING DESTINY | SELF IMAGE | SUCCESS SECRETS | INSPIRATION
Seven Secrets To Direct Your Destiny ~ Part One ~ Chapter 5
The psychology behind irrational fear and how to adjust your thoughts to follow your dreams.
Strength does not come from physical capacity; it comes from indomitable will. ~ Mahatma Gandhi
Power Thrives When Fear Dies
In chapter 5 of my memoir, Wingless Butterfly, I explained the greatest battle of my life. Anxiety disorder swept over me and shattered my remaining self-confidence. The battle to regain control of my life took every bit of strength and resolve I could muster––but defeat was never an option.
I knew first hand how beliefs and emotion could debilitate my willpower, and fear proved one of the toughest enemies I had faced so far. As all-consuming as unexpected terror is, simple fears draw energy from the same emotion.
It was easy to lose sight of acknowledging how others delt with panic attacks when my physical reaction to paralyzing fear shot through my veins like an injection of jet fuel twenty-four/seven. Finding the courage to fight back was as illusive as a fleeting hummingbird.
I had yet to learn a simple truth. There’s little difference between a courageous person and a coward. A coward is crippled by fear. Courageous people feel the same physical reactions. But instead of cowering in a pool of panic, courageous people choose to act in spite of fear.
Taking the first step forward with a constant stream of adrenaline pumping into my system terrified me, but continuing my life in that panicked state was a far worse fate.
What I learned fighting anxiety is true when dealing with any fear. Meet it head-on!
I confronted my illness by reprograming my thoughts, continually asking the question: “What’s the worst thing that could happen if my fear was realized. When I envisioned the actual event, how would I deal with it?
To my surprise, I found the most terrorizing aspect of fear is anticipation — the “what ifs.” Typically, my fears never even came to fruition, so all the worry and anxiety made me feel awful…and for what? My vivid imagination?
That’s when my life took an amazing leap forward and my future focused from obscurity to crystal clarity. I began to turn all “what ifs” into “so whats” and––in a shorter time than I expected––my fear dissolved.
Key #1:
Our thoughts can either focus on worry about worst-case scenarios that will probably never happen, or reside in hopes and dreams of a future that can burst into a universe of beautiful stars. My energy was far better spent creating dreams.
Courage is a choice — a decision––not an attribute. –– Casi McLean
I finally realized when I lived a life afraid of shadows, I ran away in fear; so instead, I chose to run the opposite direction, toward my dreams. And when I did, my anxiety attacks dwindled and disappeared.
Fear ate away at my self-esteem and confidence, building walls that isolated me from the life I desired.
Courage broke down the barriers.
But, over time I realized something still lingered inside that continued to hold me back. As much as I wanted to live my dreams, my passion and energy brought me just to the edge––only to have an internal voice pull the rug out from under my feet.
The bully in my mirror continued to haunt me…and blindsided my passion and ambition. After years of totally dedicating myself to changing my life, immersing myself in positive books and influences, and following up with affirmations, I thought I arrived.
I made miraculous strides, but when faced with the fianl decision to move forward…I caved. What still held me back? I wanted to have my book published by a traditional publisher. I knew I had something important to say that could potentially help a lot of people––but something yanked me back every time I attempted to push Send on my query letters to publishers and agents —freezing me into a gridlock between my intentions and my dreams.
I believed in every word I wrote in my manuscript, so why the hesitation, excuses, and shaky resolve? What held me in a stranglehold?
The threat went deeper than my conscious choices. I wasn’t afraid of failure. My first-hand experiences made me uniquely qulified to help those who suffered with similar demons. And I never wanted a single soul to suffer like I had.
I knew I could survive any failure I’d encounter — but what about SUCCESS? What if I succeeded with a bestselling book…or became an authority…a public figure…as star––okay, that one was a an extreme reach, but you get the picture?
Could I actually live up to the expectations and example I’d have to exhibit if I succeeded? — Me, a woman who spent a lifetime living with a poor self-image steeped in damaging beliefs.
When I considered those thoughts, my bully supported every doubt I had, and sadly––I fueled her negative energy. It wasn’t until my book found legs of its own that I truly discovered how important it was to befriend the bully in my own mirror.
Fear of success can be as daunting as fear of failure. And it lingers in the shadows, clinging to the souls of people who fight a poor self-image. I spent a lifetime living in fear and telling myself I wasn’t worthy of good things in my life…how could I ever expect to accept them even if they fell in my lap?
The answer was obvious. I had a limited amount of energy each day and I CHOSE to expend that energy on positive reinforcement instead of negative apprehension.
Worry is a learned behavior — a habit, not an emotion — and habits can be changed.
Take a moment to think about this miraculous ah-ha concept––and process it. What does worry do to change any situation? Does it have any redeeming positive qualities?
In fact, worrying expends a high level of energy. The process taps into whatever source of energy you have available, and induces a fight-or-flight instinctive reaction like the adrenalin rush of fear. The chemical reaction is meant to provide a burst of energy needed for a critical situation, and it drains energy that could be better used for more positive action.
Think about it this way, most people own smart phones, but as smart as they are, some aspects parallel issues I faced in my life. When I use certain applications, they drain the power from my phone even if I’m not actively using those apps.
Like WiFi — when I leave on my heightened energy level, it continues to work in the background and drains my battery. Fear works in much the same way. It depletes energy.
When you turn on fear or worry, it sucks your energy to dangerously low levels, leaving you exhausted, more vulnerable and even susceptible to disease, injury and ill health.
We all face fears daily. Most people make up excuses from time to time to avoid commiting their time. But when they do, they also avoid opportunities––the doors that might thrust them toward their dreams. THINK before you blow off those chances.
The busy man––or woman––always finds time to help others. Don’t rationalize excuses. When you do, you slam doors that just might open the prequel to your dreams.
I’d like to invite you to help me encourage others to pursue their dreams…Please take a look at my books on Amazon and consider buying one for yourself or for a gift. My individual books are all under $4.00 and every sold book boosts my visibility and my dream to help others reach for the stars. Thank you! Here is the link: http://author.to/CasiMcLeanBooks
CLICK the picture below and JOIN My INNER CIRCLE via the TOP BAR. As my thank you, you’ll receive a FREE GIFT!
**Side Note: If you like this story, be sure to check out my other articles on Medium — like this one: The Thing About Dreams
How I shattered the broken reflection in the mirror of my past and followed my dreams.
**Be sure to watch for the rest of this series on Medium, Seven Secrets To Direct Your Destiny ––The psycology behind the miraculous magic wand you have in your own hands…
Start with the series introduction here:
CI’d love for you to follow me on Medium. Take a peek at my bio here.
- *Side Note: take a look at my other articles on Medium — like this one: The Thing About Dreams
Maybe you’ll discover something about yourself that might help guide you to live your own dreams.
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I love Illumination. What a fabulous publication! Please take a moment to click on these links for more stories you might enjoy: Tim MaudlinJeffHerring.com Brenda Christopher MaryJo Wagner, PhD Dr Mehmet Yildiz Vickie Trancho Jesse-Melva Johnson Sunita Pandit Peg DuchesneBenecia L. Ponder John Kremer Jacquelyn Lynn Kelda YtterdalPhilNomanono Isaacs Rick Hoefer Ellen Mogensen Dave KwiecinskiJoan Kent, PhD Roger Himes Esq. Terri Ward Nicki Walsh Susan Joy SchleefNancy H. Vest Dr Jeanne King PhD Nile Nickel Cynthia Charleen AlexanderLinda Miles Murray Thomas Anderson Andrew Poletto Dr. Sue MassimoBreakfield and Burkey Tom Antion Linda Halladay
