When Doing the Right Thing Backfires in a Big Way

No good deed goes unpunished with some self-improvement opportunities

I try to keep my eyes open for self-improvement opportunities… a chance to do something nice for someone.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m no saint. Most of the time I do it because it makes me feel better about myself.

Basically, it’s selfish.

But despite that, there is a self-improvement benefit to it.

When I find opportunities to put others first, it helps me focus on their needs. Later, the selfishness may kick in but at least for a little while, it’s all about them.

Have you ever had a self-improvement opportunity that backfired in a big way?

I have.

It’s happened to me a few times in life. Who knew doing something nice could turn out to be such a bad move?

I wrote these 5 mini stories about when doing the right thing backfired… and four of them happened to me. One didn’t happen to me, or at all for that matter.

Can you figure out which one isn’t true?

I’ll reveal the fake later in the story.

These are not my finest moments but don’t judge me. These happened to me. They could happen to you.

#1 — Pay it forward… or in this case backward

A few years ago I was in the drive-through at a McDonald’s or some other fast food franchise.

I was hungry for a burger and fries or something else terrible for me that day. Not a self-improvement moment. As I pulled up to pay I had a brilliant idea… to pay for the person behind me.

I guess I should have looked in the mirror before inspiration struck.

Had I done so, I might not have felt quite so generous.

The vehicle behind me was a minivan and apparently was filled with a family bulking up for the winter, or maybe about a dozen or so hungry circus clowns. Still not sure.

I thought it was strange they took so long to order but I already committed to pay their bill.

Needless to say, my heart nearly skipped a beat when I heard the total as I was handing over my debit card.

The cashier looked a little irritated as she pried the card from my hand. A short while later she handed me my card along with two receipts.

My receipt showed $6 or $7… but somehow the vehicle behind me managed to rack up a bill of $102.

Two things are for sure, no one can accuse me of dodging that self-improvement opportunity or of not being generous that day.

#2 — Why did the turtle cross the road?

Sometime around 10 years ago this happened. My wife and I were walking in our backyard when we heard our dog Trigger barking like a mad dog.

When we walked over to him, we saw what had him so fired up. He was harassing a turtle that crawled out of the nearby river and into our backyard to bury her eggs.

I’m not talking about a cute little painted turtle or box turtle. Nope.

This was a big ol’ snapping turtle… and momma was not happy about being disturbed by a dog while giving birth.

Thinking quickly, we got them separated before either of them received a severe butt-whooping from the other. My wife took Trigger inside while I watched the turtle pop out and bury the rest of her eggs.

I was glad this happened to me as it was pretty amazing to witness.

That was until the next morning when we discovered Trigger had dug up all the turtle eggs and destroyed or eaten them. It still hurts nearly a decade later.

#3 —Brutal Honesty is Just Brutal

I wasn’t sure how to write this one since I’m still kind of embarrassed it happened to me.

Maybe not embarrassed… more like ashamed. This one involves honesty that was a little too honest.

I don’t think whoever said honesty is the best policy would give advice to be honest when you’re talking to your wife about her cooking. My advice, you may need to lie.

First, let me say my wife is talented at a lot of things including cooking.

In all our years of marriage — 15 so far— I only remember a handful of meals that weren’t good. This however was one of the ones that fell flat.

I don’t remember exactly which meal she prepared but she had spent a lot of time preparing.

I quickly realized this recipe wasn’t going to make our favorites list.

When she asked me what I thought of the dish I suffered a momentary lapse in judgement… and definitely dropped the ball on an opportunity for self-improvement. Instead of telling a little white lie to protect her feelings, I blurted out the first thing that popped into my head.

I won’t repeat what I said because it’s not nice (and I’m still ashamed).

Basically what I said was the dog wouldn’t even eat it…. and that was saying a lot since dogs lick… well, you know.

I know. I know. I’ll hope my filter never fails me that way again.

#4 — Pickup people, drop off people

Here in Michigan we occasionally have downright wicked ice storms.

They’ve been mild for the past several years. But every 4 or 5 years we seem to get one that disrupts everything. This happened to me one winter.

It was a violent ice storm that came on as I was in a movie theater watching a movie with some of my relatives.

When we went in the theater there was a little snow on the ground.

When we came out, all hell had broken loose. There was so much ice it was all we could do to stay upright walking to our cars.

When we finally got on the road we only went a couple miles before spotting a truck in the ditch.

I should have known to keep driving because it took us about an entire football field to stop before we could head back to the stranded family.

Can you guess what happened next? We weren’t helpful at all because we slid off the road and ended up stuck alongside them.

I guess it’s the thought that counts, right?

#5 — Great first impression

This incident happened to me a couple of years after I graduated high school.

I just bought my first house and my younger brother decided he wanted to move in with me instead of staying in my parent’s house.

You should know, my younger brother and I are a lot alike and we sound nearly identical on the phone.

One night my brother was in the middle of a phone call with his girlfriend when he became sick.

Why he didn’t hang up is beyond me… or for that matter why didn’t I? Wanting to help him out, I took over the call and pretended to be him. Not a great attempt at self-improvement for sure.

Talk about awkwardness.

I took my best guess as to what he would say… but I also intentionally said some strange things since I was bored.

Well, the joke was on me because his girlfriend (now wife) figured out the switcheroo and we both had some splaining to do. Needless to say, neither of them was happy with me for a few days… or was it a few weeks?

OK, which story do you think is fake?

If I did my job, all 5 should be pretty convincing. These all happened to me except for….

The first story. The one about buying $102 of fast food for the vehicle behind me.

I’ve paid for people behind me before but it’s never been more than $15 or $20. I’m not sure I’d be that generous if I heard it was going to cost me $102.

So next time you think about working on your self-improvement like doing something nice for someone, think again.

My advice is to make sure your motives are pure. If they are, do the right thing.

But be warned... 4 of these happened to me.

You never know how it’s going to turn out for you.