SOUL FRIENDS

Self-Care versus Soul-Care

Soaking in the tub of my Medium friendships

“There are good ships and wood ships, ships that sail the sea, but the best ships are friendships, may they always be!” ~ Irish Proverb

When I first separated from my former husband and moved into my own place, I received a lot of guidance on the importance of self-care. I was also given several suggestions on what’s worked for others.

Get pedicures. Treat yourself to a massage. Pick up take-out from a favorite restaurant.

I tried a few of these but soon discovered a self-care ritual that’s now become one of my favorites— soaking in my bathtub. The clawfoot tub in my apartment practically screams SOAK IN ME.

Whenever I indulge in this luxury, I make it an event for all my senses. I use lavender-scented Epsom salts. I turn off the lights and burn candles. I listen to some relaxing music. And of course, I savor a few pieces of dark chocolate.

It’s become a self-care ritual that doesn’t just feed my body and mind — it feeds my soul.

This ritual has opened my eyes to see there is a difference between self-care and soul-care. For me, self-care involves things that either feed my mind or my body — both of which are needed.

But I’m a three-part being. I need my soul fed as well.

Feeding my soul can happen in many different ways. Preparing a meal with my two sons. Walking through the woods and taking the time to notice all the sights, sounds, and smells. Playing my favorite Earth Wind & Fire tunes and dancing around my apartment.

But what feeds my soul the most are my many friendships. Say what you will about Medium, but Al and his gorithm have brought more friendships to my laptop and my life than I’d ever imagined. I set out on this journey to find a place for my writing and it has become so much more.

From the people who write weird and funny stories to the people who write deeply moving ones — many of whom do both — I’ve found a community of unique individuals living in many different places, all of whom feed my soul. I also enjoy all the responses I read — from words of support and encouragement to fun and witty banter to those oh so sweet and lovely messages from Vincent Pisano whose heart must be made of pure gold.

Some people talk about bailing on Medium and testing the waters of new and different venues for their writing. I can understand why, but I have no desire to do so. The friends I’m meeting and making on Medium are becoming my daily soak in the tub experience. They aren’t just good for my self-care.

They're good for my soul-care. I hope they stick around for a long time.

kasey sparks, © 2021

Thank you for reading. To quote Ram Dass, “We’re all just walking each other home.” If you’d like to join me on the journey, click here. If you’d like to access thousands of writers and their soul-stirring stories on Medium, click here.