Communication Is a Form of Seduction

Learn to be yourself in a seductive way through curiosity.

SEDUCTION. PICK-UP ARTISTS.

These words created in the last years great astonishment in people, almost disgusted them. Why?

Pick-up artists have always been preachers of subtle techniques to gain the favors of women, manipulating more than persuading their “preys”.

Maybe some of you heard of Neil Strauss and Mistery, maybe not. But they totally mainstreamed the concept of Pick-up artist, revealing to the world a problem, more than a solution: people need to understand how to develop a relationship.

In a society where individualism is considered better than creating a community, few people have the biggest piece of the cake. This is perfectly explained in the 80/20 principle by Vilfredo Pareto and is applicable to most areas of our lives.

Considering this Principle, you can see that:

• 20% of the guys have 80% of the girls
• 80% of the guys have 20% of the girls

Now, what does it mean? A few percentage of guys virtually have a greater chance in their dating lives, meanwhile a big pool of guys will have just few dates during their lives.

This concept doesn’t express your hopelessness in life. You will find a partner, but your dating experience won’t be as rich as you may want.

The pick-up artists world tried to understand more than everyone else what are the main problems associated with this inequality in dating lives, and it is simpler than you may think.

80% of guys don’t care about their dating life.

Why is this?

School Has Killed Your Social Skills

Culture, personal beliefs, a poor educational system. This is perfectly explained by Srinivas Rao in “What We Should Learned in School But Never Did”: “Interacting with the opposite sex is essential to our survival and well being. So, it’s absurd that we aren’t taught this in school or earlier in life.”

School never taught most of the people how to speak to the opposite sex. In order to learn something valuable about relationships, in school you had to:

• Be naturally good
• Be in a circle with other naturally good people
• Start an endless journey of trial and errors until you succeed

School offered you just one choice to learn how to manage your dating life if you weren’t “cool”. That’s why so much people think life cannot evolve. They were indoctrinated by this high-school role playing view where your role won’t never change.

Losers will be losers forever, winners will be winners forever. The school system has always failed in teaching something valuable to people, not because institutions are bad.

Schools failed in teaching values because they gave you knowledge in order to be technically prepared in the working world. The problem is that you are treated as an object instead of considering your uniqueness. And the problem with that is you won’t develop social skills unless you practice by your own.

The Pick-Up Community Solution

Seduction gurus have tried to fix social awkwardness and shyness of people during a very long time and become mainstream with the movie Hitch, where a timid accountant ask for advice to a dating coach to win the attentions of a beautiful rich woman.

With the advent of Internet, they become one of the first communities to promote self-improvement to the world. It was the first step to an evolution of the way of thinking seduction in the community, moving from a manipulative technique to a way to attract the life of your dreams.

Today, many dating coach are also sales coach. They understood the skill they were teaching wasn’t “How to get laid”, but instead “Communication”. Many of them survived because of this, and are driving lots of men through a transformative journey.

The Natural Lifestyles (TNL) is a perfect combination of the old seduction world and the new one. They teach men how to embrace their sexuality with confidence and learn to lead the girl of their dreams to a safe heaven.

What is really interesting is that their Youtube channel shows how the dating industry has created a offer that is valuable for all your life aspects: relationships, personal development, money management, success.

The guys of TNL are a great example because they won’t teach you any script or “magic words” to attract the woman of your dreams. They focus in your inside world, helping you building the confidence that is within you instead of teaching how to hack your brain to feel confident.

A Life-Changing Moment

In my journey, I came to a point where I was stuck in my mind and could not lead myself through expressing my potential, and when I started watching their videos, I realized I was wrong in many things that society and culture taught me, for example:

• Money won’t help you know girls
• The world is static, you cannot change
• Making nothing is better than making mistakes

From that moment, my life started to become different, more fulfilling. I started to see in terms of opportunities instead of mistakes, I learnt to create a long-term vision for my life instead of decide my life would be defined by my instant moments of failure.

When I was in school, I knew I had to create myself a path for my life, to find a way to see things clearly. Two years later, I saw what I was missing while listening to a world that wasn’t permitting me to make mistakes.

In that moment, I knew I’ve become the master of my reactions and thoughts.

Communication is Queen

When I started giving permission to myself to make mistakes, I decided I had to learn something everyone will always speak about but never did enough: speaking to girls.

At the time, I was living in Tenerife, Canary Islands. The clubs were always filled with people and the streets offered me a great opportunity to learn to face my fear of rejection.

What I did was nothing new to human being history: I started interacting.

You may think this sound stupid, but the simple reason you are not satisfied with your dating life is because you don’t make the effort.

While the “cool guys” and the “pretty girls” don’t need this because it’s something they do unconsciously, you need to give yourself permission to speak with the other sex.

Communication is a skill, and you need to exercise communication to understand yourself and the people you are speaking with.

So, what do you need to do RIGHT NOW in order to exercise your communication skills?

SPEAKING WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX.

“Communication works for those who work at it. — John Powell

Take your phone and start connecting with people, share your thoughts about a topic you like, start a conversation from nowhere.

The real power of communication is to think how you want the person you’re talking to will feel after your message.

Excited, Surprised or Curious? Arouse this great emotions while speaking, use your imagination to make original the message and make your receiver willing to know more about you.

Don’t be discouraged by the people who won’t respond you, it’s not your fault. They either don’t know you or are too busy in speaking with their friends, so just let go and write to people until you find someone interested in sharing thoughts.

If you want to know the basic rules in texting, here’s an helpful link.

Intention is The Game-Changer

You know what you want, but you don’t know what to say in order to obtain it.

You want her/him to go out with you.

You want her/him to kiss you.

Whatever the reason, you need first to be driven by your intention. Having an intention doesn’t mean you have to say “I want to kiss you”, but is subtly meaning you want to.

How many times you pushed when it wasn’t time to do it, or tried to get out a friend-zone situation awkwardly?

Personally, too many times. And I understood the reason for it: I was telling myself and the person I was talking I wasn’t there for romantic purposes.

Having an intention comes from within. It’s the message your body says even before speaking, and it starts from your mind.

As said in “The Ten Rules For Dating With Intention” by Huffpost “if I’m not attracting into my experience the kind of person I’d like to move forward with (or vice versa), then it probably has nothing to do with them; and everything to do with the signals I’m putting out.”

When it’s time to write a message to a person we like, we tend to play it safe. We don’t want to make them go away, or to be offended by our manners. But guess what? You’re automatically friend-zoning yourself.

Taking risks in life is what makes us grow, and setting an intention to grow is what makes us taking risks. The same works with dating: if you want a relationship, you need to set an intention to be the partner she/he deserves.

You either a partner or a friend with the first message you write or the first word you say. If you fail in showing your intention straight away, you will have to struggle a lot to show you real intentions and keeping the connection.

Are perhaps people buying milk in the newsstand?

What is your intention as you begin dating? Are you hoping to enter into another serious relationship right away? Exclusive or Open? Companion? Friend with benefits? You define this. Don’t let someone else define this for you. — Staci Bartley

You Don’t Need To Know What To Say

You’re perfect in your skin, but you aren’t in your communication.

This guide will help you exercise the magnificent art of communication and seduction, not through steps or thing to say, but through your personal touch.

Stop thinking you’re not enough or you’re boring, it’s time to show to the world you’re amazing just the way you are.

Remember: is not about money, but is only about the value you are delivering.

You are amazing, show it to the world.

If you are interested in the dating world, here are the most valuable videos you can start with:

• Rejections are Part of Pickup — Natural Style Daygame in Barcelona
• The 10 Mistakes you’re making that f*ck up your Dating Life
• 7 Life Changing Seduction Hacks I wish I knew when I started
• PORN — Why it’s ruining your Sex Life
• How to flirt over text with Examples

For any question you can find me in the comment section or at [email protected] if you feel ashamed to share your doubts to the entire community.

Thanks for reading and I hope you will let yourself speak with more amazing people like you.