Second Chances Are Overrated That Is How You Get Trapped

Would you date a guy who ghosted you for months after the first date?

I don’t know why guys think it is sexy to go radio silent of a woman. They show interest, try to get close to you, and when you begin to reciprocate the feeling, they disappear without a warning or explanation.

And sometimes, they re-appear as if nothing had happened. They expect you to take them back and continue the ride as if you were specially created to be theirs. As if you have no right to get angry if they put your feelings on hold.

I met one not so long ago. We clicked pretty fast. We had a few drinks and talked for more than five hours. We had very similar personalities and seemed to have great chemistry.

The conversations weren’t superficial. He was quite open, which also made me feel comfortable sharing things with him. He seemed like a genuinely nice person with a big heart. No red flag was spotted.

He mentioned he wanted to see me again several times during the night. When our Ubers arrived, he kissed me, gave me a big hug before leaving.

I asked him to text me when he got home, but he didn’t. I didn’t think anything of it, but as days went by, I thought it was weird he hadn’t reached out at all.

So I texted him and thanked him again for the date, said I had a great time, and asked him if he was free to get together again the following week.

He replied that he was buzzed and apologized for not getting back sooner. I let that pass. I’m not the commitment type, so I wasn’t expecting any. I did enjoy his company and was looking forward to seeing more of him.

Each time I tried setting up a second date, he will make up one excuse or another. I got fed up and stopped contacting him.

About a year later, he reached out to me and wanted us to hook up. Again he made up an excuse about getting transferred to another restrict for a temporary assignment.

I had forgotten all about him until he called. So I told him I wasn’t available. And that I had been transferred to another planet, permanently!

Some guys do this very often. They treat you like trash because they think women only exist for their pleasure. And ghosting is a perfect way to spot these sexist men.

If you ever get ghosted after he genuinely expressed his interest in you and then returns to pick up from where you left off, don’t fall for him. It’s a trap, and here is why?

He wants to keep you emotionally invested

Insecure men like to remain emotionally unattached because they know that if they don’t have feelings for you or express appreciation for your values, you’ll want to improve yourself to gain their approval.

You will be forced to do things against your principles to impress him. And going against your boundaries would definitely lower your confidence because you will always be careful what you do or say. You won’t ruin your chances of getting his approval.

If a man constantly goes off switch on you, it is because he does not value you, and no matter how you try to prove yourself, he will never appreciate you.

He wants to keep you as an escape patch

So he told you that he loves you. You’re the only one that has ever made his heart move that’s why he returned.

That’s a big lie out of the gutter of hell. If he disappeared, it was probably because he liked someone else more, and he came back because he either did get what he wanted and wants to finish off what he started with you.

It could also be he didn’t get what he wanted, but now he wants you to fulfill that need because he sees you as an easier target.

Either way, you are the alternate sex tool he can fall back on whenever he’s horny. Thinking that his intentions are genuine will be stupid.

He’s playing a long game

If you’ve ever dated a manipulator, you must know that their ego matters so much to them. They can be very nice and romantic at the beginning.

They will get close to you, make you fall in love with them, and then they will fall back after building a connection with you.

They do this because they want you to get attached to them, so you will do anything they ask of you without questioning their intentions.

Most of the narcissists I’ve dated tend to use this trick, and it works so well that sometimes I tend to fall for their lies.

They know that a woman’s greatest weakness is love. Unlike men, women fall hard when they are in love and will do anything to keep that love.

But if that love is for someone who is emotionally unavailable, she won’t feel good enough about him. She will always feel insecure, yet she will stay to prove herself worthy of his love, which often results in heartbreak.

Thank you for reading. You may like more of my relationship stories. You may consider subscribing for unlimited access to more stories like this.