Say Goodbye to These Six Fears to Live Your Dream Life

#3 Fear of Success

Do you remember that guy on the last bench in your class who never seems to study but is living a life you can only dream of?

I am sure you do.

Because you are still unsure about how even after being an A grader all along, you still don’t have access to that life.

Like most of us, you have all the weapons to face the game of life but when it’s time to use those weapons, a number of fear hidden in your psyche affect your decisions and you stay stuck in the same place.

Let me pull these fears out of your psyche and bring them face to face with you.

Fear of failure

The biggest fear in our life is this.

We have been told since childhood that we should not, can not, and must not fail.

It’s not good to fail.

No one knows why.

They didn’t tell us, nor did we ask.

This is one single fear which has stopped you from proposing to your first crush, stopping you from working on that business idea, or taking that solo trip you so badly wanted to have.

But, now, you must look at all the successful people around the world and you would see that they have failed more often than they succeeded.

If they had let their fear of failure win them over, they wouldn’t be where they are now as told by Robert F. Kennedy:

“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.”

Action points:

Next time when you are ready to take that next step and this fear of failure pulls you back, look into its eyes and ask the reason for its visit.

It’s visiting you because you have invited it since childhood.

Assess what’s the worst that can happen if you take that step ahead, and what would be its impact on your life. Assess your ability to face the consequences and make a well-informed decision instead of panicking due to fear of failure.

Fear of being judged

What will people say is the biggest dream breaker in this world.

Because people know exactly how this world should be but have no idea about how their lives should be as mentioned by Paulo Coelho:

“Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.”

But do you think the people who built this world would have thought about these other people?

Alexander Graham Bell is known as the inventor of the telephone.

But when he told this idea of making people talk through a wire in different locations, his friends thought he has gone mad and took him to a doctor.

If Graham bell would have thought about what people would say, we might still be chatting on the telegrams instead of WhatsApp.

Who knows you might come up with an idea which might change the course of the world as the ideas in this universe are friendly to everyone and favor none but the one who takes action.

Action points:

People will talk about whether you do something or you don’t.

Forget about them.

Knowing yourself is the first step if you want to reduce the burden of other people’s judgement in your life.

Next is to decide who are the most important people in your life, seek their opinion for making a decision if you want to, and make your own decision after that.

It’s your life so you are the one who has the right to make decisions for you, not that uncle living on the eleventh floor of that apartment at the end of your street.

Fear of Success

You might not agree with this but your fear of success might also be the reason you have still not built that dream you so desperately want to.

What if I succeed?

What will I do?

How will I handle it?

Will I be mobbed?

Will I lose my personal life?

How will I manage money?

I won’t be able to do so many things I am able to do now.

There are umpteen questions roaming in your subconscious mind and stopping you from making these decisions that would fast-track your journey.

“Fear of failure becomes fear of success for people who never try anything new”- Wayne Dyer

Action Points:

Sit down in a quiet place with your thoughts.

Close your eyes and think about how you are going to succeed and build the life that you want to.

Now notice another stream of uncomfortable thoughts or feelings trying to access you.

Let them come face to face to you, notice them, note them down and address them one by one afterward to understand what is that about your dream life you are scared of subconsciously and work on that.

Fear of moving away

The law of nature is growth, but everyone grows at one’s pace.

While you might be seeking continuous growth, your partner, your friend, and your family might not want to.

After all, people love comfort zones and hate change.

And when you start growing, your thoughts change, your actions change, your routine changes, your ideas change and definitely, your circle will change too.

You might feel guilty about leaving them behind.

You might think that you are being selfish or sometimes these people may also make you feel so.

And with that fear of being away from these people, you keep your journey on hold and start traveling at the same pace as these people are.

Action points:

You can not carry everyone in your journey.

There will be some mentors, some teachers, and some friends who have a purpose that they serve and move away from you.

Then, there are relations which you can’t leave just like that like partner, parents, children, best friend.

You need to have a heart-to-heart talk with them, explain your reasons for doing the things that you do, seek their support and blessings, and even if you get busy growing, make time for them so that they don’t feel left behind.

Fear of being alone

The dream that you see for your life is only yours, the work that you want to is only yours, and the pain that you are willing to face for your dreams is only yours.

Don’t expect your parents, your spouse, or your best friend to believe what you are saying or what you are going to do.

They want you to do what is right in their view, so there might come a point where they are no longer standing with you.

You will be your only supporter then.

And there is a high chance, that it would happen.

And you are afraid of that place where you are left alone by the people you loved and trusted for so long.

Action points:

That dream is yours and you are only responsible for making that happen.

Don’t blame them for not backing you up.

Their actions might be wrong but most often their intentions are not.

They don’t have the same belief and vision as you have. They are worried for you.

So, instead of feeling bad about being left alone, work on your strengths, work on your belief, make things happen, and make them believe too that this can happen,

Then you will have them standing beside you having the legs of the same belief that you gave them.

Final thoughts:

Fear is the most feared word for most people.

But if a mother starts fearing the pain of delivery, will we ever see this world in motion?

Of course not.

All the miracles happen on the other side of fear and the most common fears which might be stopping you from having that miracle life you so desperately want and deserve too are:

1) Fear of failure

2) Fear of success

3) Fear of being judged

4) Fear of moving away

5) Fear of being alone

As these fears have been with you for so long, don’t expect them to leave you in the first go.

But, if you are persistent and determined enough to make these changes in your life, they will move away slowly from you.

Till then, face the fear of fear and put sunlight on the darkness of your dream life.

“Fear kills more dreams than success ever will”-Suzy Kassem