Running Fearlessly Should No Longer be a Discussion We Continue to Have

Unfortunately, once again we need to have this discussion, and it’s time for men to step up!

• *I originally wrote this article two years ago. Unfortunately, it is a topic that is back into the news again with the #elizafletcher abduction and murder.
• Once again, a female runner is targeted by a man who can’t view a woman as an incredible work of art, but rather as a possession that he can use and discard.
• If that last line disgusted you, then I hope it does more than that. I hope it disturbs you, especially if you are male and you recognize that women deserve to be able to run in the same places men run without catcalls, without fear, and without anxiety.
• Women deserve to enjoy a pre-dawn run as much as anybody. Women deserve to run in whatever makes them comfortable. Women deserve not to have to run armed to the tooth.
• Some friends and I in the Hampton Roads area have decided that enough is enough. On September 18, we are going to gather in Virginia Beach at the Oceanfront and 1st Street. We are going to run 4 miles at 6 AM for Eliza Fletcher and every female runner who just wants to go for a run. We want to create a #RunFreeMovement to create awareness of the dangers female runners face, provide support amongst our running community, and bond with new friends and running partners. If you can’t make it to Virginia Beach, run virtually and use the hashtag #RunFreeMovement.
• It’s time to do more than talk about it. It’s time to create the space so our female runners can run free also and it starts with men changing the way they view women and their mindset.
• This story is how I first became aware of this problem in our running communities.

I had never really given much thought to there being in danger running at night until I convinced my two running daughters (two young ladies I was training with that everybody thought were my daughters since I am quite a bit older than them) to go on a thirty-two mile run in the dark of night.

Everything seemed peaceful when we were out on the country roads near our small town, but as soon as we came within city lights, I noticed both young ladies began running much slower and cautiously.

At first, I thought nothing of it and thought they were just tired. The more I would wait up ahead, the more I noticed they were looking all around them.

Finally, I stopped and just waited for them instead of running ahead and then waiting for them to catch up.

Thus began an educational experience about running I had never considered before, and a change came over the ways that I ran at night when I was out with friends that were women or non-white males.

As I asked these young ladies what was up, I was horrified by the thoughts that went through their heads during what I consider the most peaceful time to run, the middle of the night.

Hopefully, the way I have changed how I run will help others see the changes we need to institute into our running routines.

The Things I Never Thought of on a Night Run

The above is what I see, as a white male, when I am running at night. In other words, vast reaches of nothing.

When I run at night, I gaze at the stars, and the reflection of the moon on water if I’m fortunate enough to be near water. The sounds I hear are also full of nothing, yet so full of peace.

Crickets and birds and the soft whoosh of the wind in tree branches. That’s what I hear.

Many of my friends see and hear different things than I had ever seen.

My friends asked me as I ran with them through the night, “did you not see that guy standing in the yard back there?” I said, “Nope, what yard?” I hadn’t even thought of the yard of the ranch house we had run by moments before. It didn’t even register.

What these young ladies saw was the house as they were coming up on it and every single place a person could be hiding behind to jump them and assault them. As they approached a house that barely registered on my radar screen, they were looking for how they could avoid every possible hiding place.

They noticed a man standing in the yard of the ranch house, noted that he was in his pajama bottoms, robe, and slippers, and even noticed that his hair was messed up as he had just been sleeping.

At 2 AM, I didn’t even see a dude!

I decided since we were about five miles from the town limits and neighborhoods, I would stay back with the ladies and try and see what they saw and hear what they were hearing.

As we came down into the town limits and were heading onto one of the bike paths, one of the ladies told me they had a bad feeling and asked if we could run in the middle of the street.

As we went past a section of trees, they asked me if I had ever seen the homeless camp inside this section. I told them that I had but hadn’t given much thought to it.

They then described what happens when they run past this spot in the middle of the day. They described how the eyes of the homeless guys that I barely knew were there would track onto them as soon as they were in their vision and that the men’s eyes never left them as they ran past.

They described the comments the homeless men would make as they ran past, just trying to stay physically fit and enjoy the peace of running as I do.

I was so pissed off that I wanted to run over and throttle these disgusting males. My friends then informed me that would leave them alone in the middle of the night running down a street.

As they described what innocent noises like a tree branch skittering down the sidewalk made them feel, I felt powerless.

There was nothing I could physically do to help people that were just like myself to feel safe running in the places I found some of the most amazing peace I ever thought possible.

Change is Possible

There is no way that I will ever be able, alone, to help women and non-white males feel safer as they enjoy running.

There are, however, some practical things that I have incorporated into my running that help me focus more on the other runners around me who may not feel as safe as I do.

1. Become more aware of the other people around you. The other day, I was running on the boardwalk at the beach on a pre-dawn run. I had passed a young lady running about five minutes before. As I ran, I came upon a park bench and a young dude who was sleeping raised and stared at me. I turned around and ran back toward the young lady and without saying a thing I just nodded and stayed a little bit in front of her and positioned myself closer to the young dude lying on the ground. The young lady and I never exchanged a word, and I don’t know if it helped her feel safer as she passed the guy, but I hope it did.
2. We all have friends that would love to run in places and at times when there is nobody else around. Strive to invite these people to run with you and then run at their pace instead of setting off at a record pace. Every run doesn’t need to be a world-beater. Sometimes, it is good to see things through another person’s eyes.
3. We all have friends that say inappropriate things about women and other nationalities. Stop tolerating it. Speak up and let them know that their words and actions are not okay and you won’t accept them.

My deepest desire is that we would make our world a safer place for all. It’s not going to happen overnight, and we won’t see societal abnormalities like racism and sexism change in a flash.

However, you can change things for your friends with little acts of kindness and awareness. Look out for others and help others enjoy the things we take for granted.

Let’s all resolve to run for the Eliza Fletchers of this world who will never be able to enjoy another sunrise and see if we can make this world a little bit better place!