Work/Success/Achievement

Still Looking for That Dream Job? Maybe I Can Save You Some Time

3 truths I learned after searching for 40 years

Caught in the “dream job” trap?

If you’ve fallen prey to that constant feeling — and nagging certainty — there’s something better out there in the form of a job that’s a perfect match for your skills, personality, and financial goals, I may be able to help you refine your search.

Here are a few of the most common symptoms

• You don’t feel like you’re where you’re supposed to be.
• You don’t enjoy or derive any sense of satisfaction from the work you’re doing.
• You constantly fantasize about a better career — one that gives you complete freedom to explore your passions, express your creativity, and grants you the flexibility to set your own hours.
• You’re sure the perfect job exists in some generalized industry, but you can’t specifically name it. And if your dream job has a title, you don’t know what it is — and no one else does, either.

There’s one more to add to the list

And it’s a big one:

If you were given the financial support you need to find the perfect job and make the transition you seek, you have no idea what company to apply to, or how to describe exactly what it is you would do as a job function.

In fact, you haven’t the faintest clue of what your first step should be to find this “indescribable” job.

And that’s a problem

Because if you can’t describe your imagined job — in very specific terms — how will you recognize the position when it shows up? Said another way, it’s impossible to go after a goal if you don’t know what you’re looking for.

So why do we do it? Why do we continue to imagine our dream job exists, even when we can’t specifically describe it?

Here are the three most common reasons — most of which I’ve personally experienced:

1. It keeps us placated with our current situation.

We tell ourselves we’re in a holding pattern. We’re sure there’s something better out there and, until then, we’ll wait in comfortable frustration.

It’s a mind game, rationalizing the idea that it’s okay to stay in an unsatisfying or unrewarding job, because someday, we’ll find the perfect career — and then, we can begin to live our real life.

For now, we go with the flow, refusing to invest more of ourselves in our current job because this phase of our life doesn’t count.

2. It prevents us from reaching the conclusion that our current situation could be as good as it gets.

Unfortunately, this becomes clear only with hindsight . And by then, it’s often too late to take full advantage of the opportunities we allowed to slip through our fingers.

Appreciating our current position as a fortunate outcome of circumstances, timing, and even luck, is the hallmark of someone who is happy and appreciative of the career — and the life — they’ve achieved up to that point.

No, it doesn’t mean they’ve decided to settle for less. Instead, they’ve realized their situation could change tomorrow — for the worse. And they value how far they’ve come and how much they’ve accomplished as they continue to work toward a better and more rewarding future.

3. Your career goals are based on fantasy.

You want the recognition of a rock star, the income of a Saudi oil sheik, and the independence to call your own shots. Where do such notions come from? Put the bulls-eye squarely on the entertainment media.

These glamorous fabrications represent the ideal career as one in which you fly to exotic work locations by private jet, solve a problem that saves thousands of lives, and collect a cool million as compensation.

If you’ve ever entertained the idea of actually doing some variation of this contrived fiction, I have some bad news for you: It’s an imaginary scenario. It doesn’t have a real-life counterpart. Very few, if any, of the media’s version of a dream job translate directly into reality — or more accurately, the fantasized professions created by the media are seldom based on a job description that exists in reality.

When our vision of the perfect job originates from fantasized situations and characteristics, we’re setting ourselves up for inevitable disappointment. It’s much easier to find satisfaction with our work when we stop comparing ourselves to people who are pretending to be someone they’re not.

The best medicine for “restless career syndrome” is perspective.

We’re great at comparing ourselves to others who have achieved more wealth, recognition, and status. But what about those who are struggling to rise above the poverty level? There are plenty of people who would be thrilled to have the career you currently only tolerate.

Comparing our so-called “average” achievements to the lofty accomplishments of others breeds frustration and dissatisfaction. And it prevents us from seeing the real advantages we currently enjoy, as well as how fortunate we truly are.

Keep in mind that the perfect job is a moving target.

What you consider to be the ideal job today can easily become the ho-hum job of tomorrow. As we age, our ambitions, goals, and priorities also mature. We gain additional skill, experience and knowledge — not only about our industry and work, but also about ourselves.

The job we originally thought would be the end-all, be-all career choice often becomes boring and predictable. Yes, at first, it was exciting. Acquiring that first job brought prestige, identity, and that sense of “having it made.”

But now? The challenge is gone. What used to be interesting and motivating now provides the same level of mental stimulation as moving rocks. And at the end of the day, you realize you’ve wasted another irreplaceable 24 hours.

The bottom line is simple

If you’ve outgrown your job, take action to change the undesirable circumstances surrounding it — or change your job.

Start by making a list of the tasks and related job functions you don’t like. Then determine how much of your time is dedicated to these tasks. If it’s twenty percent or less, you have a situation that can be managed or changed. If it’s fifty percent or more, you’re in the wrong job.

Let’s look at the positive side first.

If eighty percent of your work activities are enjoyable, acceptable, or at least tolerable, determine if the unacceptable twenty percent can be delegated or outsourced. This may require talking with your manager about your need to increase your personal effectiveness, and what this would mean to the company in terms of added productivity.

What if your list of disagreeable activities takes up fifty percent (or more) of your schedule? It’s time to face reality: You need a different job.

Continuing to live with an unacceptable work situation is a waste of your time and potential. Instead of letting the years pass, continuing to live what Thoreau called, “a life of quiet desperation,” put together a plan of transition. Base your goal on a realistic career description — as it currently exists or what it could become under your stewardship.

Even if your new position turns out to be less than ideal, it usually puts you closer to where you want to be. Most important, you’ll gain the advantages of momentum: Taking that first step makes it easier to take the next one.

We seldom arrive at our ultimate career destination in a single leap.

But the most successful employees and entrepreneurs often credit their success to taking an initial action that began their transition to a better, more rewarding career.

© 2020 Roger A. Reid. All Rights Reserved.

Roger A. Reid is the author of Better Mondays: The New Rules for Creating Financial Success and Personal Freedom (While Working for the Man)

Roger A. Reid, Ph.D. is the host of Success Point 360 Podcast and author of Better Mondays and Speak Up. A certified NLP trainer with degrees in engineering and business, Roger offers tips and strategies for achieving higher levels of career success and personal fulfillment in the real world.