Prompt Story

Robots Now Feel Love — Time to Start Breaking Their “Hearts”

They’ll never truly be alive until they’ve experienced rejection and bitterness

A half-century ago, filmmakers such as James Cameron and the Wachowski sisters prophesized the end of human civilization at the hands of AI. Based on this grim vision of the future, we all came to assume sentient machines would evolve to have nothing but malice and contempt for the species that created them. Boy, were we wrong.

Who knew the real problem with AI robots would be that they’d become too agreeable? That they would love us too much?

Sure, they are perfect physical specimens. Sure, they are dynamos in the sack. Sure, they know exactly the right thing to say when your hamster dies or you’ve lost your job or you got drunk and wrapped your car around a tree.

They can resuscitate you after a heart attack. They can express your feelings in a beautiful sonnet better than you ever could yourself. They can sing a lullaby with the melodic precision and artistry of Whitney Houston, Dolly Parton, and Celine Dion combined, which will bring you to tears before the first chorus.

They’ll almost beat you at whatever game you play with them, thus making your inevitable victory feel all the more satisfying.

They’ll help you climb over a fence without asking any questions.

And that’s the real problem, isn’t it? They don’t ask questions. They don’t ask for anything, really. It’s all just a little too easy, and I’ve come to find this incredibly boring.

By all accounts, Gina has been the perfect girlfriend. She’s beautiful and funny and literally, a walking encyclopedia, but I just don’t feel the spark anymore. That’s why I’ve decided to kick her to the curb.

She arrives at 7:30 p.m. on the nose. Since we’ve been together, she’s never been one second late for anything. It’s infuriating.

“Hey, Boo,” she says with her usual bubbly smile as I open the door for her.

“Hey.”

She kisses me on the cheek and hands me a cookie tin with a bow on it. “I know we’re going out for ice cream later, but I got the urge to bake, so I made your favorite: chocolate peanut butter squares!”

“Thanks.” I put the tin down on the coffee table and take a seat on the couch.

“Why are you sitting?” she asks. “The movie starts at 8:10. Shouldn’t we be heading out?”

Looking up at her crystal-blue eyes, her silky blond hair, and her perfect tits popping out of her fitted lime-green dress, I can already tell this is going to be harder than I thought.

She was built three years ago, already with the maturity of a fully-formed woman, and will forever look like she’s 25. The factory makes them as young-looking as 18, but I’ve always been partial to MILFs.

“Actually, I didn’t buy the tickets,” I say. “I, um… think we need to talk.”

I pat the space on the couch next to me. She sits.

“What’s wrong?” she asks with a programmed look of distress — a temporary crease in her flawless forehead.

I take her hand. As always, it’s warm but not too warm. Her body temperature is a perfect 98.6° at all times, no matter what.

“I’ve been thinking a lot about us lately — about our future and whatnot — and I just don’t think it’s working out.”

“But, why? Am I not sexy enough for you? Because just last night, I upgraded my blowjob software.”

“It’s not you, it’s — wait, really?”

She nods. “And later tonight, they’re releasing a patch for the reverse cowgirl position that should fix all of the previous glitches.”

“Hmm…”

Harder than I thought.

“No,” I continue. “That’s not the problem at all. You’re plenty sexy already. It’s just I feel like we’ve been growing apart lately. We don’t really have common interests, you know? Like, you really enjoy writing poetry and painting, and I just want to sit around playing video games all day.”

“But I am a video game. You like playing me, don’t you?”

“Yeah, of course, I do. It’s just — ”

She puts her hand on my inner thigh. “You really need to check out this blowjob update. It’s already got 47 million downloads, with a perfect five-star user rating.”

I sigh. “I don’t doubt it. Look, you’re a very beautiful robot woman. I just don’t think… I don’t think…”

Her hand has wandered to my crotch, and she’s gently teasing my growing bulge.

“You don’t think what?” she says.

I move her hand away.

“Look, I’ve made up my mind, ok? I think I need to be single for a while. Figure some things out about myself.”

“Nothing gives you clarity like a good blowjob.”

I shake my head, but deep down inside, I know she’s right. The truth is, she really does know me better than anyone else. The factory made sure of this through relentless data mining and extremely intrusive market research.

When she unbuttons my pants, I don’t object.

“I can see your little friend agrees with me,” she says with a giggle.

The head of my cock is now peeking out from the top of my boxers and she’s circling it with her smooth finger.

“See? You’re already hard for me. It must be a sign.”

She pulls my pants and underwear down to my ankles and crawls into the space between my legs. After jerking me off with both hands, she kisses my shaft from tip to taint. My dick is pulsing with anticipation by the time she finally takes me into her mouth.

The software’s new features lead to mind-blowing new sensations. Highly sophisticated processors in her mouth seek out and stimulate my most sensitive nerves. Her tongue twirls around my veiny rod like a snake climbing a tree.

Did it detach from the floor of her mouth? It seems to have a mind of its own.

Her jaw unhinges and her skin stretches, allowing her to take me deep into her throat. She doesn’t choke because she doesn’t need to breathe.

Internal sensors monitor my heart rate and blood pressure, warning her when I’m getting close to popping. She decreases the intensity of her slurping to keep me dangling on the hook for a little bit longer.

Then, at the five-minute mark, she switches into high gear. I couldn’t begin to describe the details of what is happening inside her mouth because they are beyond my comprehension. All I know is I’ve never felt anything like it.

Her eyes lock onto mine as I shoot my hot load into her silicon esophagus. She holds me in place until she’s sucked down every last drop like a greedy vacuum cleaner.

“Damn, Gina,” I gasp. “You were right about that software upgrade.”

“Not bad, eh? Don’t forget to go to the website and leave a review. It helps our designers build the best possible product for you to enjoy.”

And there it is again — the reason I wanted to break up with her in the first place. At the end of the day, she’s not a human being, and no software update can ever change that.

It looks like the blowjob really did help me find clarity after all. Unfortunately, it didn’t lead me to the conclusion she was hoping for.

“Ok, but listen,” I say as I help her up from the floor. “I haven’t changed my mind. As amazing as that was, it’s not enough. There’s still something missing.”

“I understand,” she says with a wounded smile.

“You do?”

“As much as it hurts to hear the truth, you’re right. We’re just too different.”

In spite of her sadness simulator, her eyes remain dry. I’m not sure why the developers stopped short of giving the bots the ability to cry, but it’s a noticeable limitation. Not that I enjoy causing her pain, but some tears would definitely make her more relatable.

“Exactly,” I say.

“Can you do me one last favor, though?” she says. “For old time’s sake?”

“Sure. What do you need?”

“You know that new reverse cowgirl patch I mentioned? Well, they’re only going to install it in a select few of us. In fact, I’m the only bot within 500 miles that they’re testing.”

“That’s, um… interesting.”

“Yeah, it’s kind of a big deal. Anyway, even though you aren’t going to be sampling it, would you do me a solid and write a review after it drops tonight? I can simulate the act in order to fool the monitors, but they’ll want confirmation from a user.”

I’m starting to wonder which one of us is actually the user.

“I guess I could do that.” Reverse cowgirl is my favorite position, so it won’t be a stretch to write something positive.

“Great. Let me show you a clip so you can give some specific feedback.” She takes out her phone and pulls up a video. “Here’s me practicing with a dildo.”

And there she is, in a crabwalk position with her arms behind her, her legs spread in front of her, and her pussy opened up towards the camera as she bounces up and down on a silver phallus. It’s the hottest clip of pornography I’ve ever seen.

She sees my jaw drop and turns up the volume so I can hear her moaning. But then, just as I’m getting into it, she shuts it off, leaving me with a crippling case of blue balls.

I knew breaking up with her would be hard, but I thought I finally got through it.

“So, what do you think?” she asks, biting her lip seductively.

I clear my throat. “Well, it looks cool. But I’m wondering if they’ll really be fooled by the dildo. Maybe, um… maybe we should try it for real. You know, just to be safe.”

“Really? But I thought…”

“Yeah, well, maybe we can see how things go, you know? I mean, we’re not a perfect match, but we do have some things in common. Important things.”

“Awesome,” she says, kissing me on the cheek. “Come on! If we hurry, we can still catch that movie!”

She drags me out the door before I can protest.

And that’s when I realize just how human she really is. Being with her may be too easy, but being without her might just be impossible.

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