Review of Stories: Diane Lee

A Lady On Her Way…

“She remembered who she was and the game changed.” ― Lalah Delia

I really enjoyed this challenge from Dr Mehmet Yildiz which is to review the collection of stories from the submissions from this challenge:

This story is in response to the 2nd challenge that can be read about here:

I cannot tell you how I landed on her and her set of stories, other than going where I was guided.

So, the other day I spent my lunch break in my garden reading her stories, which she has categorized, “Single Life, Power & Patterns & Life In Vietnam,” and I was immediately excited. I liked her order and I liked the topics.

I wish I could have had the time to do this post that day, but it’s been quite busy.

I did make sure to highlight her stories when I read them. If you follow me and read these stories, you’ll see where I really connected with them. And for the record, I do suggest that you read them!

The first story of Diane’s that I read was:

I can really relate to this story, being very close in age to Diane, and having been single for a really long time as well.

I haven’t counted the years since my last real “relationship” that was actually a “relationship” but it has to be at least 10 — so I was eager to get her perspective on this situation and see what her experiences have been like.

I found this story illuminating and real.

She goes through many situations and revelations, and they rainbow train of men with various titles that we, as women can all relate to.

Oh how can I relate, she mentions: Mr. Avoidant, Mr. Covert Narcissist and Mr. Fucktard to name a few (hilarious and relatable) I knew them all too! Especially that last one, a few times.

It’s important to point out that she doesn’t man bash — she’s just being real about how difficult it is to find someone if you really are looking and then what it’s like to STOP LOOKING.

The sweet spot.

She mentions how people are always telling her she’ll find love when she least expects it and how she’s pretty much debunked that notion.

Here’s my take on it:

It’s not about it being at the moment when you least expect it, it’s about it being when you’re the most ready for it, and that happens when you’re so into you and your life that you’re just not searching. AT ALL.

For many of us, we’ve been married, we’ve had relationships, and just because those didn’t last until we died doesn’t mean we haven’t been in it, learned a lot (from Fucktard’s) and have decided to play the game the the mature way.

Being an “older” single woman, I can really relate to people looking at me and always wondering and asking me often, “Why are you single?” and “You’re not married?!?! WHY?” (been there) and “Why don’t you have a boyfriend?” and the like.

I take it as a compliment, it’s sweet that people care about my wellbeing and want me to be happy, they think that I’m worthy of a loving relationship — and I do too, it’s just that I’m not willing to be with anyone to have any relationship. I really like my space and being alone…Plus, I am happy. But I get it that they don’t get it.

I think my biggest take away is in the end of this story is her realization that her life — despite being single — is exactly what it’s meant to be, at least for now.

Not extending ourselves out there like we did when we were younger, despite warnings signs or how covert a narcissist was, we learned some lessons about who to make room for in our lives and sometimes we have to really be put through it-that’s obvious from her story (and my own). Choosy, that’s what I define it as. I’m really choosy with who gets my time and into my space, it seems so is she.

We can either decide that our lives are not complete because we don’t have a partner, or we can relish the fact that if we are not partnered up it’s for a reason, at least one — most likely many — many that we have decided on our own.

Being single or being taken doesn’t “just happen” we choose that situation. And, as we get older we choose to be single because we want the ultimate happiness, and we’ll give it to ourselves.

For anyone who’s single and tried to change that, I get it. Life has a different flavor when you’re coupled up, but there’s something so freeing when you’re single and happy about it.

You are your relationship, you can be in love with you, you can shower yourself with everything you want, while keeping your space safe from invaders who really don’t belong in your life.

I decided years ago that if I’m not coupled up it’s because I’m not meant to be. Period. I have plenty to keep me occupied, I have a lot to work on — and most likely HE (whoever that is) is going through that too. Working on him and his stuff, getting to be a shinny man without baggage and issues, connected spiritually and free of toxic triggers, etc. etc.

When HE is done cooking, some bell will ring in the universe and I’ll get to bite into that reality…And I’ll let him find me. I’m certainly open to it, but until then, I’m definitely not searching.

Reading her story made it more clear- and I’ve found that for our Divine Feminine aspects — especially those of us who are women in these lives — it’s our duty to come into these realizations for ourselves and break the mold that says in order to be whole we must be coupled.

As Diane points out, there is nowhere the same stigma for men as it is for women to be single — especially as you get older.

I’m glad she wrote about this, and I hope that other women feel empowered by her story.

Next story I was guided to was:

Oh boy, THIS.

I don’t know how anyone can’t see Melania Trump and not see someone who is miserable. There’s lots of reasons for this and they all stem from one place.

Having a narcissistic megalomaniac as your partner. I’ve known some NPD monster’s in my day but he is the absolute essence of what an NPD person is like.

Another thing I have in common with Diane is finding myself in not only a couple of these relationships over the years, (the first one being with my mother but not identified until I was in my late 30’s) but also in a full blown domestic violence situation. ME. Meeeeeee.

It’s a really twisted place to be, and for me it ended in a full on restraining order situation. It was that bad.

So again, I was drawn to this story because of the nature of the theme. And I’m fascinated with Melania and what she must deal with and how she does it-and truth be told, I feel for her so much.

It’s my nature as a Psychic Physical Empath to feel others and I am hyper sensitive — to an extraordinary degree (I heal people globally via distance energy work, so tapping into people is really quite easy for me).

It’s painfully, physically-energetically obvious that she doesn’t want to be where she is with whom she is with — and Diane points this out quite perfectly, and how we all feel in those situations if we find ourselves in them.

Another real and raw read from Diane, short and to the point. A cautionary tale with links to red flags to look for when dating.

Then I was guided to read:

I thought to myself, ‘A single Australian lady living in Hanoi? How freakin cool is that! I must read this, especially if she’s talking about being (almost) happy.’

She writes about what the weather has been like there in the summer, and making it worse — the lock down. Because of circumstances (and I love this) she has had to start riding her bike and this became a thing of great joy for her.

She writes about talking and reading-in Vietnamese-shit, I couldn’t even spell that correctly without help! I could never imagine learning Vietnamese, but I suppose if you go and live there like she has, you will — if you want to, and she has put forth a lot of time and energy to do just that, making her experience there much more rich — that’s evident.

She talks about getting into arts and crafts and how that has been healing for her, tapping into her inner child.

And ultimately, how all of these things has her in a place that she’s really comfortable, or at least as comfortable with herself and her life as she can be while being in a foreign country, during a pandemic.

It’s obvious that she is going through a great process in her life, and it’s really exciting and empowering to tap into that energy.

I feel that I was guided to these particular stories for a reason, which is how I feel about everything.

By the end of this sit down with Diane Lee, I came to see a full picture.

It’s obvious that Diane has been through some shit and she’s still healing.

In the process though, she’s remembering and getting to know herself again, and in a new way.

She has made a lot of changes in her life, has put forth effort into making evolutionary steps to create a life that feels good to her.

As a single person.

Reading these stories was like sitting down with her — these 3 stories illuminates her journey — where she’s been and where she’s going in a really beautiful way that left me feeling really happy for her.

And I can see her bouncing on her bike with a big smile on her face as she travels around Hanoi.

Thanks for sharing your stories, Diane Lee. It was a pleasure to read them.