Reverse Bucket List: Things I Used to Want and Now Have.

Summary

The author reflects on their personal journey, expressing gratitude for achieving life goals and overcoming challenges, including health battles and personal growth.

Abstract

The web content is a reflective piece by an individual known as Aunty Shanti, who shares her appreciation for the fulfillment of her life's desires. She credits reading Rosa Diaz-Casal's work for inspiring her to acknowledge the abundance in her life. Among her achievements, she cherishes her role as an aunt to five children, her travels, and the energy she regained after cancer treatment. She is thankful for the support of her family during her illness, her improved home environment, and her professional accomplishments, including organizing world medical conferences and overcoming her introverted nature. The author also celebrates her recent success in writing, being published on Your Tango, and the joy of experiencing snow for the first time. Additionally, she describes the personal satisfaction gained from rekindling her piano skills during the pandemic and the influence of literature on her writing. Looking forward, she prioritizes the health of her loved ones and aspires to travel, write a book, learn French, and maintain an organized living space.

Opinions

The author values the time spent with her nieces and nephews, considering it a privilege.
She experiences gratitude for her past travels, emphasizing the importance of exploring the world before the onset of age-related ailments.
The author believes in the resilience of the human body, attributing her recovery from cancer to the love and care of her family.
She acknowledges the impact of a nurturing work environment on her professional confidence, despite later facing career setbacks due to toxic workplaces.
The author is proud of achieving her dream of becoming a writer and being published.
She expresses a deep appreciation for the beauty of snow, an experience that was both unexpected and surreal for someone from the equator.
The author finds joy in playing the piano and appreciates the progress she made during the pandemic lockdown.
She recognizes the influence of reading on her writing skills and personal enrichment.
The author's greatest wish is for the good health of her family, placing their well-being above her own.
She maintains a positive outlook, expressing hopes for future travels, writing a book, learning French, and keeping a decluttered home.

Reverse Bucket List: Things I Used to Want and Now Have.

Gratitude and taking stock always makes me happier

I was inspired to write this after reading Forget The Bucket List by Rosa Diaz-Casal .

Reading it made me feel calmer. Certain stories have that X factor and that effect on me.

She has brought to the forefront of my mind something I intuitively know but didn’t quite take the time to reflect upon.

I wanted to have children.

In the last 15 years, I’ve been privileged to be Aunty Shanti to 5 and they fill my whole heart. I count my lucky stars daily.

If you’ve read my stuff you know I’m a pretty obsessed aunt. The kiddos know it too and don’t mind.

I’ve always loved children and now there is a home for my immense love and protective, nurturing instincts.

I was worried the children I loved would migrate and I’d never see them grow up.

So far they haven’t. Touch wood.

I’ll never take this for granted as other children I’ve loved have moved away and it’s hard to maintain a relationship as life happens, children tend to forget even if you don’t.

Especially if you knew them when they were only 6 or under. The memory of a goldfish.

Although strangely as a child I had the memory of an elephant, with memories as far back as age 1 plus. Which is why I’m so attached to people.

I wanted to explore the world.

I get FOMO when I can’t travel as much as those around me, due to lack of funds and time. But I am grateful for every single trip I’ve been blessed with, especially when I was working in an office and could afford it.

I would advise the young ones who can still rough it out, to budget travel as much as they can before they hit 45, when ailments start. I say 45 cos that’s when my cancer was diagnosed at stage 3.

Although honestly, I started experiencing chronic fatigue at age 33. Makes sense as I experienced the most traumatic event at 32, which was the sudden loss of my darling dad.

Those who know me have read my stories of this grief. This deep love with no place to go. Take heart. There is hope and healing.

I wanted to gain back my energy after surgeries, chemo, and radiation.

The human body is pretty miraculous and I did recover, mostly due to love. Loved ones who truly cared, blew me away. Forever grateful for the love and care from my family.

My mum’s younger sister stayed with me overnight in the hospital hardly even sleeping. Leaves me gobsmacked how much she sacrificed.

My partner cared so much that it shocked me. But deeply touching. He prepared me Milo and crackers and sat beside me on an uncomfortable stool.

My mum was with me and my sister made multiple trips to buy me food as I didn’t like the hospital food during chemo.

My angelic mum even made me jello when chemo destroyed my taste buds. And my aunt made me my favourite coconut candy.

My aunt and uncle sent me videos of the kids, my cousins all visited and the children treated me so lovingly, even when I was bloated with no hair and I thought they would find me scary to look at. They still saw, the me they knew! Beyond the vessel. 🥰

Also, I’m currently in remission. Never thought I would be. Diagnosed with stage 3 womb cancer at 45. With a recurrence at 46 plus.

I wanted a nicer home environment.

I have a much nicer bedroom and living space now after a renovation some years back. I have been taking it for granted.

You know how you get used to things you’ve already wanted and forget that initial feeling of euphoria? Especially as clutter piles up.

Clutter is no friend of mine. Time to declutter.

I wanted to get out of my shell and be more confident.

I did that in the earlier part of my career organising world medical conferences with the participation of thousands of delegates. Most importantly I worked with the kindest team and had fun. I started working when I was 21 years old, full of energy and so earnest.

I had to give Internal Corporate Communications PowerPoint presentations and towards my 10th year got pretty good at it although I’m a super, self-conscious, introverted, highly anxious wreck.

Fooled myself to fool the audience and the use of humor in my slides worked. I’m always shocked when the audience laughs at my lame joke when I expect to hear crickets. Probably just a supportive crowd.

I’m also confident in being able to dine in solitude and enjoy it. With Medium for company of course.

To be real I tanked my own career due to toxic workplaces that came later and bullying. I also had untreated PTSD and depression. So not all roses but I want to look at the good bits.

I always wanted to be a writer

Now I am. On my beloved Medium this year. Earlier it was WordPress in 2010.

But Medium led me to be published on Your Tango in August 2023 and listed as an author so I’m so thankful. Just 2 articles but I’m happy as I never expected it.

I wanted to see and touch snow.

One day in Boston. I had accompanied my partner to his work conference. I was lucky enough to experience a freak blizzard. It was my first time and beyond magical.

Lives on in my mind and photos. 10 minutes of pure magic. Again something unexpected and felt so surreal.

To put this in perspective, I come from the equator, where it’s perpetual summer. And I’m always in discomfort and sweating, even in a T-shirt and shorts.

I wanted to be able to play the piano well again

I was miserable in the covid pandemic lockdown so practised daily and went up in confidence and ability. I went from a grade 3 level to about a grade 6 level.

Far from perfect. But to play what I liked, was so satisfying and joyous.

All the books I’ve read

So much enrichment. Helped imperceptibly in my writing too. In terms of vocabulary and style.

Travel literature allowed me to travel without having to leave my comfy recliner and squeeze in cattle class.

To have my mum and loved ones in good health

It’s all I want, actually. Their health, always before mine, please 🙏🏽

If you ask me to dream a bit more?

I hope to travel more, write a book, understand French (I currently have basic vocabulary through Duolingo), and keep my surroundings decluttered and organized.

Oh yes, more cuddles and texts saying I love you. ❤️

Just want to put it out to the universe.

Whether it happens or not, I’m blessed with what I have now.