Resolved To Be Free From Fear

In response to Coffee Challenge: Why I want to be a better me in 2022

New Year’s resolutions and I aren’t exactly the best of friends; we have a shaky track record at best.

There was the year I resolved to join a gym and get in shape. I accomplished the first part, and by March had let the second part go.

There were the years I resolved to write in a journal every day in order to document my oh-so-interesting young adult years. Let’s just say I have “several” journals with many, many blank pages.

The only year I actually accomplished my resolution was the year I decided to give up drinking soda. I had my last soda on New Year’s Eve, and to my surprise, I actually made it 365 days without drinking another. Of course, I started drinking soda again the very first day of the next year. It had become more about accomplishing the goal than getting the health benefits from it.

As I look back at my past resolutions, I’ve noticed that all my resolutions focus on tangible goals with tangible potential results: getting a better body by going to the gym, having a completed journal by writing everyday, and being healthier by not drinking soda. But despite the resolutions being fairly straightforward, I’ve failed at almost all of them.

So this year I’ve decided to change things up and make 2022 the year I resolve to change my mind instead of my body.

I Resolve To Free Myself From Fear

In a previous article I wrote about fear, I discussed how fear has held me back my whole life. I had an overwhelming fear of failure that kept me from trying so much over the years. I had to overcome that fear in order to start this new writing journey, and I still deal with it every day.

But I’ve realized that fear has held me back in other ways I hadn’t considered before. It’s not just a fear of failure that haunts me; it’s fearing the consequences of trying something new (and being terrible at it), or the fear of what others will think of my efforts.

Enough is enough. My resolution for 2022 is to free myself from fear in whatever way it encroaches on my life. And there are a few things I plan to focus on to make that happen.

I Resolve To Speak My Mind

I’ve always considered myself to be forthright and well-spoken. I’m (mostly) polite and considerate, while at the same time, I can proudly curse like a drunken sailor when the situation calls for it. This is not the part of me I plan on changing.

What I do want to work on is not being afraid of speaking my mind. I feel that, in various social situations, many people feel afraid to share how they really feel in front of others who may not agree with them. I know I am guilty of this at times, and though I have improved in recent years as I have emotionally matured, I still find myself unintentionally silencing my voice to avoid rocking the boat.

Well, no more. Going forward into this new year, I will do my best to quash that fear of social judgement and share my opinions, no matter what. This doesn’t mean I won’t be polite or considerate, nor does it mean I plan to stop cursing either. But if you ask for my opinion or my advice, you are going to get it, plain and simple.

No more telling people what I think they want to hear. No more remaining silent when a friend or relative says something nasty or passive-aggressive in my hearing. It’s time to speak up and speak out for myself and for those around me. No more the silence of a fearful mind!

I Resolve To Embrace The Consequences

Naturally, I cannot expect to change myself without seeing those changes reflected in others. When you change your ways, you must expect that those around you will greet the changes in different ways.

There will be people who won’t like the new me, won’t like the things I say or do. And I have to be ok with that. I will have to remember that the people who don’t like when I speak my mind probably never really liked me to begin with.

There will be people who will no longer want to associate with me, who may find me rude, annoying, unbearable, or worse. And that will be ok. If those people cut themselves out of my life, it will be for the best. Because as some wise person once said,

“Those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.” — Bernard Baruch

So I will let those who don’t matter go, and focus my time and my love on those who don’t mind.

2022 will be the year I resolve to set myself free from fear. The fear of failure, the fear of judgement, the fear of social consequence. This may be the most difficult resolution I’ve ever set for myself, as changing the mind is, I imagine, much more challenging than changing the body.

But I already took the first step when I published my first article on Medium, and I have no doubt that by continuing to write as I have and putting my heart on the page, I will conquer fear in all of its forms.

Bring it on, 2022!

Like what you read and want to read more? Consider joining Medium and supporting me and thousands of other writers at the same time! Click here to join through my referral page and I will receive a portion of your membership fee!