Relationship Writer Tests ChatGPT for Intimacy Tips

Ethics, plagiarism, and a wee bit of human perspective

I write this after midnight, a steamy mug of fresh hot chocolate at my side. Maybe not the healthiest late-night beverage — but as a nocturnal writer, I’ll celebrate the small victory that I’m not nursing a very full glass of wine.

I’m a millennial who has never engaged an AI writing tool in her life. That’s because I wasn’t really all that interested. I specialize in crafting relationship articles and providing value to readers by sharing my lived experiences — kind of hard to do in a compelling way when you’re not a human who connects with other humans.

But you better believe I noticed all the buzz around ChatGPT and other innovative AI writing tools. And try as I might to avoid it, curiosity eventually got the better of me.

I finally took the plunge and introduced myself to ChatGPT. I’m so new to the landscape that I wasn’t even sure how to get started, but it didn’t take long to figure out. (You can get started here, by the way, if you need a little direction.)

The purpose of this AI writing experiment was to uncover answers to two equally weighted questions:

• How deep is ChatGPT’s knowledge of human connection and intimacy?
• How well can this bot write about it?

Hey ChatGPT, help me write an article about being a better lover

As someone who isn’t especially tech-savvy but can at least get by online, I had no idea what to expect when I put the bot through my first test.

I wanted to see what ChatGPT had to say about improving intimacy in a romantic relationship to see if I couldn’t find some inspiring language for an article. Maybe get a few key bullet points to focus on and then fill in the gaps with my own relationship experience.

I didn’t give it specific instructions to help me write an article or story. I didn’t specify word count or style manual, and I didn’t ask for outlines. I simply typed: How can I improve intimacy with my partner?

And you know what? The chatbot had some good pointers for humans, surprisingly. Here are a few that it generated, completely untouched and unedited by yours truly:

Communicate openly: The foundation of any healthy relationship is communication. Talk openly and honestly with your partner about your feelings, needs, and desires. Don’t be afraid to express your vulnerabilities or ask for what you want.

Spend quality time together: Intimacy can be built through spending quality time together. This can involve doing activities you both enjoy, having meaningful conversations, or simply cuddling and being physically close.

Explore each other’s interests: Taking an interest in your partner’s hobbies and passions can help you connect on a deeper level. Whether it’s trying a new activity together or simply listening to them talk about their interests, showing support and interest can build intimacy.

— ChatGPT, Advanced AI Chatbot by OpenAI

I was impressed with these results! As someone who’s seen two marriages crash and burn and is now currently enjoying one of the best, most intimate relationships of her life, I can personally attest to all of these as useful ways to maintain a happy, healthy relationship.

These tips point out ways for bonding emotionally, intellectually, and physically. And even if they’re a bit obvious, they are all things I’d recommend. And, they can provide a good starting point for a valuable article when you incorporate your own voice and experience.

I threw a little party when I saw that ChatGPT isn’t afraid to talk about strengthening intimacy in the bedroom too — a highly important key to relationship success if you happen to be a sexual being.

Spice things up: If you’re in a sexual relationship, exploring new things in the bedroom can help build intimacy and strengthen your bond. Talk to your partner about what you both might be interested in trying, and be open to experimentation.

— ChatGPT, Advanced AI Chatbot by OpenAI

Not only does this content have the bones to make a good article, it’s also pretty well-written. At least technically speaking. A highly valuable tool, but one whose power can be wielded for good or evil — depending on the user.

You can see that I’m putting ChatGPT’s hot relationship tips in block quotes and attributing them to the proper source. I do this somewhat ironically because it gives me a little giggle, but also because it leads into the next question a serious writer would (or at least should) have: What are the ethical implications of asking AI to write a blog post for me?

This bot has strong opinions about crediting sources

I asked ChatGPT its opinion on using the exact language it generates for a blog post, effectively copying and pasting paragraphs or even an entire article and passing it off as my own writing.

The AI bot once again showed its wisdom, as well as its admirable artistic integrity. An integrity, one could point out, that not all humans have when it comes to earning a living writing.

While writers can legally get away with taking exact language generated by AI and using it in a blog or book, it’s highly unethical to do so without proper attribution.

If you're using AI-generated language to the letter in your work, cite it so you can let readers know. Or, simply use it as inspiration for ideas. Reframe the concepts it provides by writing them in your own unique voice and, even better, add context from your own perspective — whether that comes from your profession, education, or lived experience.

It makes perfect sense. It’s what we’ve always been taught as writers, ever since the days of high school essays. Passing off writing as your own when you didn’t write it is called plagiarism, plain and simple. No matter if you took paragraphs from a musty old encyclopedia or ChatGPT.

Of course, we know that many online writers bypass this and simply churn out content generated by AI, copying and pasting to make some quick cash.

And I assure you that your readers are smart enough to see right through it.

Articles that use AI-generated language alone are missing the emotion, unique voice, and personal human touch that readers connect with. They lack the creativity, insight, and perspective that makes your work stand out amongst the endless digital chasm of steaming content garbage.

ChatGPT can give decent relationship advice — but its voice is not YOUR voice

Remember, building intimacy takes time and effort, so be patient and persistent. By working together and being open and honest with each other, you can strengthen your relationship and deepen your intimacy. At least, that’s what ChatGPT says about human connection, verbatim.

But what do I have to say about building intimacy with readers by showing up as an honest and vulnerable writer? In my own words?

I say that ultimately, relying too heavily on AI, no matter how sophisticated it gets, will remove the essence of YOU from your writing. And publishers and readers alike will fail to take notice of what you put out there.

Instead, use AI as a thought motivator. Take all the inspiration you can get, and drench your articles in your own voice.

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