Relationship Traps You Shouldn’t Fall For

What your gut and mind need to convince your heart

Relationships are hard. Love is complicated, and relationships are even more complex. We desire to love, be loved, and be happy with the people we choose to live life with.

But some things could get in the way of that happiness, like staying in unhealthy and toxic relationships or dealing with someone trying to control you by manipulating your emotions. It’s important to know what these traps look like in the beginning stages so you can avoid them for yourself and your future relationships.

Those who suffer from relationship trauma may feel they cannot escape certain behaviors from their past experiences. Still, there are ways that you can learn how to overcome these traps without the added stress of past trauma affecting your healthy relationships.

What Relationship Traps Feel Like

A relationship trap is something that can harm your relationship. There are many different traps that you need to watch out for.

Getting caught in a relationship trap can trigger behavior or feelings that cause you to feel “trapped” or “stuck” in an unhealthy situation. At first, you are usually unaware that this is happening. The following are a few examples of how one may feel when “trapped” in a relationship:

1. Feeling unable to leave

2. Believing your partner to be perfect and that you are the problem

3. Believing that this is the only person you will ever love or the only person who will ever love you

4. Constantly worrying, overthinking, or expecting the worst

5. Feeling unhappy or hopeless in your relationship

Difference Between Healthy Relationships and Being “Trapped”

First of all, it’s essential to understand the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships. Healthy relationships are ones in which both people feel like they can openly express their feelings, share their intentions and desires, and be their authentic selves with the other person.

Healthy relationships are still complex. However, they are based on mutual respect, love, and partnership.

Toxic relationships, on the other hand, are much more manipulative. They’re based on controlling behavior and manipulation, leading to unhappiness, hurt, or even violence and abuse.

Often, people enter relationship traps believing there will be a positive outcome. Paying attention to all red flags at the very beginning is the best way to avoid falling into unhealthy relationship traps.

Typical Relationship Traps You Should Not Fall For

-The “perfection” trap:

This is when you believe your partner to be perfect and that you are the problem. This can cause you to stay in an unhealthy or abusive relationship because you think it’s your fault.

-The “rescuer” trap:

This happens when someone believes they can “save their partner from themselves.” If your partner is always unhappy, struggling, or chaotic, and you find yourself constantly trying to fix them, this may be a sign that you’re in the rescuer trap.

-The “jealousy” trap:

Jealousy can be a normal emotion, but when it’s constantly present in your relationship and causes you to feel insecure or like you’re not good enough, this is a problem. If you find yourself constantly worried about your partner cheating on you or leaving you, this may be a sign that you’re caught in the jealousy trap.

-The “controlling” trap:

This is when one person tries to control the other through manipulation, threats, or even violence. If you find yourself always walking on eggshells around your partner or afraid to do anything without their approval, this is a sign that you may be in a controlling trap.

Red Flags and What To Avoid

1. Never date someone just because you are single
2. Never stay with someone who doesn’t respect you
3. Never commit to someone you know you don’t trust
4. Never settle if you feel ignored from the start or they never make time for you
5. Never try to commit to someone who isn’t looking for something serious
6. Never count on someone who won’t be seen in public with you
7. Never feel obligated to stay with someone who you don’t get along with

The Importance of Loving Yourself

The importance of self-love cannot be denied nor ignored because not only does it help you better understand why certain relationships are toxic for you, but it also helps improve your mental health. Self-love will also help make sure that your current relationship isn’t impacted by past trauma.

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*Disclaimer: I am not a doctor or expert. If you need advice or counseling, please reach out to certified professionals.*