Regret

Summary

A widower reflects on his life with his late wife, expressing his regrets about not prioritizing their relationship over work, and shares how he applies the lessons learned to his current marriage.

Abstract

The author, at fifty-one, became a widower after his wife lost her battle with cancer much sooner than expected. He recounts their thirty-two years of marriage, filled with love, laughter, and challenges, and how his wife's faith and positivity continue to influence him. Despite his deep sorrow, he acknowledges that while he has some regrets for not always putting his family first, their life together was rich and fulfilling. He now uses the wisdom gained from his past to fully appreciate and prioritize his new marriage, living a life of purpose and gratitude.

Opinions

The author believes that the pain of regret is far heavier than the pain of discipline, emphasizing the importance of living with purpose.
He holds a strong belief that death is not the final end and that life should be lived fully to avoid future regrets.
The author values the impact of his late wife's example on his life, particularly her faith and optimism.
He expresses thankfulness for his past experiences, acknowledging that they have shaped him into a more appreciative and committed partner in his current marriage.
The author suggests that reflecting on past regrets can serve as a reminder to cherish and invest in present relationships.

Hope awaits…

At the age of fifty-one, I became a widower. My wife had gotten cancer, and the first diagnosis gave her three to five years to live — yet it was not to be. Cancer spread quickly through her body, and they shortened the outlook to eighteen months. Within six months, she passed.

To say I was devastated would be an understatement. I met Charlotte during my senior year in high school, and we were married at nineteen. For thirty-two years, we were by each other’s side, with all the successes and challenges that come with marriage. In the end, she died a horribly painful death.

To this day, I wish I hadn’t been so busy with work that I missed a lot of time with her and our daughter.

While our life together was not perfect, it was full of love and laughter, triumphs, and victories. Charlotte taught me to always look for the good in life, and her strong faith in Christ continues to be an example to me in how to live a Christian life.

I believe that death is not the end — and I also know that to fail to live our lives with purpose can bring many regrets. As one of my mentors said:

“We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is, discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons.” — Jim Rohn

I am thankful for the thirty-two years I had with Charlotte and all I learned from her. Looking back, I do have some regrets because I didn’t put our relationship first at times. But overall, we had a good life together, and my regrets are few.

Now, quite a few years later, I put the things I learned from my past to good use. I am now remarried to a wonderful woman, and couldn’t be more thankful for our life together. I refuse to allow anything to draw me away from our relationship. I value her and our life together in a way I could not have done if I had not learned from my past. It is a good life, full of love. Do I ever look back? Only occasionally to remind me how incredibly blessed I am in the present!

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