Reasons for the US to Go to War with China

Many of America’s leaders, including President Joe Biden (D-Delaware) and important members of Congress want a war with the People’s Republic of China.

War with China is stupid because the People’s Republic has the world’s largest regular military with 2.185 million people in uniform. America is number three with 1.388 million people in uniform. Moreover, China has the world’s largest navy with 425 active warships, and 400 nuclear warheads. The US has the world’s second largest navy with 243 active warships and around 5,400 nuclear weapons.

Yet, Biden and his advisors think war with China is a good idea. To encourage this stupidity, we shall list reasons for the US to go to war with China.

Reasons for America to Go to War with China include:

1. The draft was so much fun we need to do it again.
2. We need another big war memorial with lots of names on it in Washington, DC. The last one was for Vietnam.
3. We can succeed against China. Just as we succeeded in Iraq and Afghanistan.
4. The United States military can fight the People’s Liberation Army after giving all of its weapons and ammunition away to Ukraine. Hopefully, the Ukrainians will give us all of our weapons back in time for the next war.
5. Americans are too stupid to ask where all the consumer goods at Amazon (AMZN) and Walmart (WMT) come from. Hint: China has 28.7% of global manufacturing output.
6. There’s no absolutely no way the Chinese can produce more weapons than the United States. Never mind the fact that the Chinese are already manufacturing more of everything.
7. It’s been 70 years since Americans spent time in Chinese Prisoner-of-War (POW) camps, after the Korean War. A new generation of Americans needs to repeat that experience.
8. The US has a tremendous plan to defeat China. It was written by the same people who wrote the Afghanistan evacuation plan, so we know it will work.
9. Blowing up the world’s only sources of advanced semiconductors (Taiwan) is a smart way to advance civilization.
10. America can survive without the advanced semiconductors from Taiwan. We will just have to learn how to use payphones and watch cable television again. We predict the riots will break out three weeks after ordinary Americans lose Netflix (NFLX). It’ll take a week if Americans have to watch network TV again.
11. Nuclear war is not so bad. If you believe this we have some WeWork stock for you to buy.
12. Begging India for military aid will be a great look for President Biden. Hopefully, Prime Minister Narendra Modi will not take Biden’s call for help.
13. World War II ended the Great Depression and started 30 years of prosperity. World War III wil do the same if can avoid nuclear war.
14. Hopefully, the Chinese will rebuild America after World War III. Just as the United States rebuilt Japan and Germany after World War II. This is necessary because the US government is not rebuilding America.
15. Life in a radioactive post-apocalyptic wasteland will be fun. Don’t believe us just watch Miracle Workers: End Times.

So yes, there are many reasons for a US War with China. However, every supporter of that idea we found was clinically insane.