Summary

The article discusses the existence of real love and the importance of effort, mutual respect, and personal growth in maintaining lasting relationships.

Abstract

The article "Real Love Does Exist" challenges the modern cynicism towards love and relationships, arguing that genuine love is not just a fleeting feeling but a choice and an action. It emphasizes that love evolves over time and can be experienced in different forms throughout one's life. The author suggests that a healthy relationship involves two people actively working together to improve their partnership, rather than expecting one partner to carry the burden. The article also touches on the significance of constructive criticism, the joy of shared dreams and adversities, and the transformative power of positivity in a relationship. It encourages individuals to be patient in love, as genuine connections are often found when not actively sought.

Opinions

Real love is not confined to a single type or experience; it can change with different life stages and perspectives.
A prosperous relationship is characterized by mutual effort and the ability to differentiate between toxic and healthy dynamics.
It is crucial to recognize manipulative behavior and to remember that one deserves a partner who accepts them as they are.
Love is more than just a good feeling; it is a conscious decision and a series of actions that contribute to the relationship's well-being.
A partnership should be a collaborative journey of personal and shared growth, with both parties contributing to the relationship's success.
Constructive criticism from a partner should be valued as it aims to help rather than harm the relationship.
True love fosters a sense of security and encourages vulnerability without fear of exploitation.
Positivity in a relationship can lead to personal transformation, increased self-esteem, and the desire for a long-term commitment.
The pursuit of love should not be desperate or rushed, as genuine connections often emerge unexpectedly.
While not every relationship will be perfect, resilience and teamwork are key to overcoming challenges and achieving happiness together.

Real Love Does Exist

Saying “I love you” isn’t everything.

Real love and lasting relationships seem to be long forgotten, as something only our grandparents seemed to have found exclusively back in the day.

Nowadays, we are swarmed by articles and comments by the media and even by our physical surroundings, be it at work or college, even our social circles, about how cheating has become the typical cliche gossip directed to every young couple they can target, and the typical phrase, “real love doesn’t exist”.

If we were to randomly ask a handful of people one single question such as “What’s the longest relationship you’ve ever been in?”, most of them will reply with how they have never been able to inch past the three-month mark.

We can’t settle for just one type of romantic love, because this feeling can change through the different stages of life, and of course, it depends a lot on how your point of view of world and relationships is at that moment.

There are many things that could turn a love story into a nightmare, but also plenty of factors that could turn a romance novel into a real life experience.

You will have your unforgettable first love, and if you are lucky enough this will be your one and only for the rest of your life. If not, it is part of the process we call growing up. Later on you will find yourself head over heels with someone who will make you see the world like a paradise on earth. This could happen only once, just as it is possible to be experienced twice and even more, you never know.

And so we have our everlasting true love, the one that feels like home and allows you to be your real self. That endless love that everyone yearns for, yet most people who are unable to find it decide to give up and settle for just about anyone who will come around, sticking to the saying of “better marry the one who loves you rather than the one you love”, or stay single for the rest of their lives.

Do not take me wrong, there’s nothing invalid about being single if that’s what you have chosen. But this isn’t what the article is about, is it?

Even though men experience love in a much more different way than women do and vice versa, it doesn’t take a lot to be able to differentiate a good relationship from a bad one; a toxic relationship from a prosperous one.

Do not let anyone fool you, as you deserve what’s best and feels right for you. Anyone who tries to constantly correct the way you are and negatively criticize you is being actively manipulative without you noticing, only making you feel bad about yourself and forcing you to adapt to their ideals, instead of accepting the way you are.

“Love feels good, but real love is so much more than any feeling. Real love is a choice. Real love is action.”

— Shannon Ashley

You are in this together

A healthy relationship consists in two people, a couple, focusing on constantly contributing to bettering their partnership, and not only expecting the other to take the first step in fixing their relationship.

There is a big difference between bad criticism and constructive criticism. If you are being given advise by your partner over something that could positively impact your life, and/or your relationship, listen to them. They want to help you, not destroy you.

Being proactive will be the key-move to reduce negative encounters, preventing issues from building up and eventually exploding, taking the relationship to an end. Someone who’s intention is to be with you for the long-term will have this mindset as well.

A relationship means both of you have each other, in the bad and good times. This means sharing and respecting each other’s dreams, planning for a future together, and dealing with every affliction life can throw at you without falling apart. Sharing the good news and opportunities without rivaling each other.

There has to be an effort

No one is perfect, we make mistakes, we apologize and forgive each other. We will have our faults, not only once but many times. But what really makes a difference is the intention of correcting our errors and taking responsibility for them.

You make an effort of trusting, allowing yourself to let your guard down around this person. Let yourself be known in depth and detail, and show your true colors trusting your partner’s good judgement, and become vulnerable knowing they’d never exploit you over it.

If you are unsure, always having to look for commitment indicators, it might be the time to sit down, have a talk and find out whether or not your relationship has a future.

Positivity changes you in the best way possible

You can go through your entire life feeling like a loser, like a huge disappointment, even ugly and unlikable. But it is until you meet this person when these negative thoughts start to vanish one by one.

You feel appreciated, you feel loved and cared for. Even if you’re not obsessed with your looks, you start wanting to look good for them. And whenever they stare at you, this feeling of fulfillment and sweetness bursts from the inside, making you feel like the luckiest person alive.

The fear of commitment stops being a impediment, and you start opening up to the proposal of “Until Death Do Us Part”. You probably never had the intention to get married or have children at all, but when calling them your “girlfriend” or “boyfriend” doesn’t feel enough anymore, you start wanting to see them as your “wife” or “husband”. You want a family with them. You want the stability of a long term commitment.

Take your time, love finds it’s way to you when you less expect it. Believe it or not, the less you look for it the higher the chance to find a genuine partner will be. There is no need to rush or try too hard, being desperate will make people run away.

A healthy and stable relationship is not impossible at all. You will go through a lot before you can settle down with someone who will be entirely worth it.

Not every relationship will be perfect, and not everything can always be possible. But to be resilient and work together to conquer any sort of hardship you might encounter on your way towards happiness.