Summary

Recent research on rats with Karen-like characteristics reveals that Karenism is more closely linked to boredom and the need for stimulation rather than entitlement, suggesting that the dopamine spikes associated with encountering obstacles are a key factor.

Abstract

The article discusses a study that challenges the common belief that Karenism, a term used to describe a sense of entitlement and demanding behavior, is primarily driven by entitlement. The research, conducted on rats from suburban neighborhoods, indicates that Karen-like behavior is associated with a need for excitement and stimulation, as evidenced by increased dopamine levels when faced with obstacles. The controlled group of rats, which faced no obstacles, showed baseline brain activity and required narcotics to sleep, contrasting with the experimental group that experienced dopamine spikes and restful sleep after overcoming challenges. This study suggests that Karenism in humans may also be an addiction to the rush of confronting obstacles, and that the behavior is a way for individuals to break from monotony.

Opinions

The author initially believed that Karenism was about entitlement but changed their opinion after conducting in-depth studies on rats.
Previous research linking Karenism to entitlement is criticized for being based on limited and biased observations, such as a researcher studying only his wife and her friends.
The article implies that the phenomenon of Karenism has been misunderstood and that the new research provides a more accurate understanding of the behavior.
The author suggests that encountering obstacles and the resulting dopamine spikes may be a form of escape or excitement for those who exhibit Karen-like behavior.
There is a hint of empathy or understanding towards individuals exhibiting Karen-like behavior, viewing it as a cry for help or a desire for more fulfillment in life.
The article pokes fun at the scientific community for holding onto outdated theories and for the irony in using democratic processes to discredit the previous Karen entitlement theory.

FUZZY DATA

Rats Prove Karens Aren’t Entitled

Alice in slumberland

I met a Karen at a swim meet this weekend. A real Karen, not a turbo-boosting inner-white lady who exhibited Karen traits. A woman named Karen.

Whenever I meet a human female named Karen, it’s like skipping the formalities and recognizing someone from the old neighborhood. This Karen was visibly nervous. We all were.

We had journeyed outside the geography of our liberal bubble to watch our children swim. The kids were swimming at a meet beyond our 97% vaccination area code. Whenever someone isn’t wearing a mask in our neighborhood, they are confronted with the words “What? You’re a Republican now?”

We’re all very angry when people go outside our unspoken rhetoric.

Living in this area, I used to think the Karen issue was about entitlement but I’ve proven that theory wrong. I know that’s hard to believe, but after in-depth studies on a group of rats possessing Karen-like characteristics, I was shocked to learn my entitlement hypothesis was wrong.

Karenism is not as closely linked to entitlement as studies previously suggest. This out-of-date Karen data came from an overzealous researcher glomming onto a trendy notion, hoping to score a book deal or become a household name.

Upon further research, I discovered this young n’er-do-data scientist had only studied his wife and her friends. I scrutinized his research, debated it, and received a grant that would enable me to disprove his inconclusive data, make me a household name, and score a book deal.

After studying 1,000 rats collected from suburban neighborhoods where people toss out expensive leftovers, Karenism can now be conclusively linked to boredom.

We, scientists, observed the Karen rats walking two paths. The controlled Karens walked a path that was a straight line. The experimental Karens also walked on a straight path, but we would occasionally drop an obstacle into their path.

Electrodes connected to their brains showed the experimental Karen rats exhibited extreme dopamine spikes whenever an obstacle arose. The controlled rats maintained baseline readings, showing no change in brain waves, heart rate, or dopamine levels. They were essentially zombies.

At the end of the day, the experimental rat had a restful sleep while the controlled rat, who had been repeatedly walking a straight path, needed narcotics to fall asleep-even though they were in continuous motion.

This blew the previous Karen entitlement theory right out of the scientific water. Researchers who had supported that theory admitted they had only watched their wives, or had been standing behind a Karen type in a Starbucks line and had been agitated by her.

An outlier confessed she had merely been co-President with a Karen on the PTA. They all apologized but concluded they still believed their fuzzy Karent data was correct. Luckily science doesn’t work that way in a Democracy.

We, scientists, now have reached a consensus that the controlled Karen rats show similar behavioral patterns to the controlled Karen human females. The dopamine spike is so high, Karenness can be considered an addiction.

So, the next time you see a Karen yelling at a barista, or telling the principal she wants her kid to skip a grade, know this. When the Karen brain is activated, Karen becomes a CAN-DOER. She’s not woke but she is awake from her slumber.

Activated, Karen becomes a woman she has deprived herself of being in life. A woman who takes no prisoners, not leaving until she gets her way, and will not take NO for an answer. In a way, we should be happy for her. Karening is her transportation out of the suburban brain into the world.

Sadly, when the Karen rats' brains are deactivated, when they walk a straight line again without obstacles, their dopamine levels plummet. Not only do they no longer walk straight on the path, but they crash their emotionally hungover rat bodies into other rats who were just trying to get from point A to point B.

When I left the swim meet, the Karen I met cut me off. When I honked, she gave me the finger. At first, I wanted to unroll my window and tell her how she wronged me, but then I remembered my research.

I let her pass knowing I had made a Karen happy that day and that it might not last forever, but for one brief moment, I was helping a zombie come alive.