Ranked: The Boys 10 Best Episodes (According To IMDB)
Who needs an opinion when you can refer to that bastion of truth we call the internet?
Three seasons deep, there’s no doubt left. The Boys is juiced up on more Compound V than humanly possible. But that’s what supes do. They take massive amounts of drugs, kill massive amounts of people, then return for another season to do it all over again.
All we can do is review the footage and try to take away something positive. Or at least funny.
With no less a guide than our friend and romantic ally to all aquatic life everywhere, here is The D33p!
10. Season 1 Episode 4: “The Female of the Species”
IMDB Ranking: 8.7
This episode is a killer.
No, really, look at how many people died!
From the shocking scene with Homelander and Maeve on the airplane to introducing a badass girl with a healing factor to rival Wolverine’s (or any of his kids), this episode signaled a dark turn for the series.
If Homelander was willing to let so many people die — and Maeve was willing to let him — what was the series not willing to do?
The D33p: “It turns out that with Seth Rogen as a producer, not even dolphins are safe.”
9. Season 1 Episode 7: “The Self-Preservation Society”
IMDB Ranking: 8.7
Along with straight up murdering yet another innocent collection of aquatic life, this episode introduced a stunning collection of lies that would come back to haunt those lying liars.
See also: Brightburn does what the Snyderverse couldn’t (how to make sure your genre mashup doesn’t suck)
Could they have avoided the devastating consequences of the season 2 finale if Homelander had discovered his son was alive sooner? Or would that have merely hastened Homelander’s descent into an evil worthy of Brightburn?
8. Season 2 Episode 6: “The Bloody Doors Off”
IMDB Ranking: 8.9
The references to Lamplighter in season 1 were as intriguing as his name was stupid, but nothing prepared me for the actor who portrayed him for three episodes. None other than Shawn Ashmore — identical twin to Aaron Ashmore — who played Iceman in the Fox/20th Century X-Men movies. The Boys make all kinda of subversive references, but this episode makes one of my favorites.
But the character I’m dying to see more of is Cindy. That’s the telekinetic god who shows Dark Phoenix how it’s done. Cindy is played by trans non-binary actor Ess Hödlmoser, who brings their extensive background as a contortionist, circus performer, and stunt coordinator to the role.
Queer Nerd Note: If you’re queer and impatient waiting for Ess/Cindy to hopefully return as a main character (or heck, give them their own spin-off FFS), check out their eye-opening co-authored case study on their own recovery from TWO top surgeries to affirm their gender without inhibiting their career as an acrobat.
7. Season 3 Episode 4: “Glorious Five-Year Plan”
IMDB Ranking: 8.9
Fresh off their terrorizing stint in Stranger Things, the Russians are back again, this time with a human experiment that may prove the end of Homelander.
Along with introducing the supe that could spell the end of superheroes — if he’s ever sober enough, boy does Mr. Soldier smoke a lot of [REDACTED] — this episode reveals the true intentions behind the former showrunner for Supernatural. They do, it turns out, have a real five-year plan: to prove that the only thing better than Jensen Ackles as Batman is Jensen Ackles as Soldier Boy.
6. Season 3 Episode 7: “Here Comes a Candle to Light You to Bed”
IMDB Ranking: 8.9
Kimiko gets her powers back, Hughie’s powers are probably going to kill him, and Black Noir is the mastermind behind Soldier Boy being captured by the Russians —
Wait what?
See also: The Unproduced Sequel To THE ROCK We’ll Unfortunately Never See
In the comic series, Black Noir is a different character. He’s secretly a clone of Homelander, complete with all of his abilities, who is masterminding a plot to make Homelander think he’s evil in order to make him actually become evil.
But in this series, Black Noir isn’t invincible. He can’t even eat an Almond Joy without falling to the ground in flashbacks of that Game of Thrones series finale. Despite his seeming death in the series 3 finale, coverage reports that the character will return in a new form, this time reprised by the stuntman who has been helping portray the masked version of the character all along.
5. Season 2 Episode 3: “Over the Hill with the Swords of a Thousand Men”
IMDB Ranking: 9
One of my favorite superhero movies doesn’t come from DC or Marvel (or whatever Sony is doing). It comes from the Gunn brothers and their amazing horror movie Brightburn. It retells the childhood of Superman, but as a horror movie testing his temptation to use his powers for evil.
In this episode of The Boys, Ryan uses his powers to attack Homelander and defend his mom (aka the love of Billy Butcher’s life). Though it would be until the end of season 3 before we got to see a hint of how evil Ryan might become, we still have to wait until season 4 to find out if he becomes Homelander’s greatest protege or greatest enemy.
When it comes to fathers and sons, it’s hard to know until it’s over.
4. Season 2 Episode 7: “Butcher, Baker, Candlestick Maker”
IMDB Ranking: 9
In a tragic but kinda cool (heh… heh…) end by immolation, Lamplighter chooses to exit stage right. For true nerds, encasing himself in fire is the final subversive payoff to his version of Iceman (The Wrap) fully manifesting his powers in X-Men: the Last Stand.
The episode raises an important question (without begging): is fire really the worst power? Because the X-Men movie’s version of Pyro was dispatched just as easily as Lamplighter. If you can answer that, maybe you can help me with this next one. Is Pyro immune to fire? Or did he leave his multiverse’s version of the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants by following the same path as his fire-powered brother named Lamplighter?
3. Season 1 Episode 8: “You Found Me”
IMDB Ranking: 9
The season 1 finale guaranteed I would come back for the season 2 premiere, but it wasn’t until I returned to the early episodes of The Falcon and the Winter Soldier that I gave the race relations the attention they deserve. A-Train vowed to go cold turkey with Compound V, but he soon relapses. I would have, too. He leaves Vought Tower on crutches because, well, he has a broken leg. The battle with Hughie and Kimiko went G-R-E-A-T.
And then security stops him for no other reason than...
He’s out of costume and can’t run at super speed with a broken leg anyway, so for a terrifying moment, he can’t defend himself from a moron ready to take A-Train down for reasons that have nothing to do with the actually evil things he’s done. Will A-Train and that guy have a final showdown in season 4? You know, now that A-Train has his powers back…
2. Season 2 Episode 8: “What I Know”
IMDB Ranking: 9.4
The season 2 finale had to hook audiences into season 3 while also delivering a conclusion that could stand on its own if Eric Kripke had smoked his last Rogen. And holy **** did The Boys pull out all the super stops to hook us.
Billy reunites with his wife and sorta step-son Ryan, but the final confrontation leaves Stormfront as good as dead, Becca actually dead, and then a ton of other people suddenly dying when their heads explode.
WTF…?
Nerd Note: The only question bigger than how it would all turn out — at least for me — was: Why doesn’t everyone with telekinetic powers use them to blow up people’s heads?
1. Season 3 Episode 6: “Herogasm”
IMDB Ranking: 9.7
Holy herogasm, Batman! I worried this episode would be way too much like Eyes Wide Shut for me to not avert my eyes most of the time, but Seth Rogen brings his usual flare for the crude yet absurdly funny. The real climax, however, wouldn’t come until close to the end of the episode.
Soldier Boy and a temporarily super-powered Butcher and Hughie take on Homelander. Three against one — with Butcher having what may as well be a copy of Homelander’s powers — seems like a fight they can’t lose. But moments from Soldier Boy nuking Homelander, this show’s evil Superman screams with the fury of Clark Kent fighting a hangover. These three might have the guts and the strength, but it’s tough to overcome a narcissist fearing his final moments of desperation.
A surprising yet inevitable season 3 finale
Sometimes, as the season 3 finale hints, the magic bullet has to go back in the Russian chamber. Homelander is the big bad this show can’t live without. Part of the fun might simply be in seeing how this evil man-child miraculously escapes defeat every season finale.
My guess is that while Ryan will become an integral part in fighting against Homelander in season 4, he will ultimately choose to sacrifice (or be stripped of) his powers so that he may live as much like a kid as he can (aka get kidnapped by super-villains, forcing Butcher to teach up with Homelander again, yadda yadda).
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