#10:|FRIENDSHIP|MEDIUM|ENGAGEMENT|LOVE|LETTERS|
RAINDROPS ON A SIX PACK
Letter #10: Reply to James Edward Young (Dare to enter... we only will be talking about ass…ets.)
Where grand gestures are reserved for romantic relationships, one man decided to break the mold and take his friendship to the next level.
On a bended knee, Medium author James Edward Young proposed a bond of friendship. To seal this bond, we would write to each other on this platform.
I hope you can stop by and spend some time reading our letters. I am not quite sure if our life stories are your cup of tea; however, I am sure you will bust out a giggle, fall to the floor and laugh out loud, fart, pee on yourself, have a stomach ache from laughing or, like me, often cry with tears of joy.
Who knows?
Maybe, just maybe, the world will witness more friendship proposals on bended knees and a whole lot of love.
A link will be provided below for all other past letters between James and Love.
We hope you enjoy this unique journey!
Please know we do not mean any disrespect; we are just two authors having fun with each other’s letters.
Letter #10, Replying to James Edward Young
December 11, 2023
Dear James,
Since you now just classified our letters as a competition,. (Link to Letter #9 from James’ provided below.)
Game on, my friend.
Touché’ on the “Butt Naked” letter to me. (literally butt naked!)
James, picture this:
On a stormy night under the moonlight, a strong rainstorm ensues; you hear thunder and lightning, then you run into the rain. Permeating the air is the mesmerizing scent of rain on the ground. Then you hear the pitter-patter of tantalizing droplets delicately caressing the chiseled contours of a well-defined abdomen.
James, as fingertips glide over a glistening six pack, the coolness of the rainwater juxtaposes with the warmth of desire.
Can you even take your eyes off of that?
Rain.
Rain possesses an innate ability to reveal the raw authenticity of nature. Similarly, a wet six-pack reveals a person’s dedication, discipline, and resilience. The rainwater accentuates the muscles, tracing their lines like an artist's brush. The intimate union of rain and physique turns a human’s abdomen into a living sculpture of bliss. Each touch of a wet six-pack becomes an intimate dance of desire, a physical manifestation of strength and vulnerability.
The rain acts as a catalyst; it can wash away barriers, allowing vulnerability to surface. As droplets slide across these muscles, inhibitions wash away, leaving behind an unfiltered glimpse of the person beneath the surface. This vulnerability breeds intimacy, allowing an emotional connection to flourish.
James, you wrote:
I don’ think it was ever the face that launched a thousand ships. I think it’s more likely that it was the ass that launched a thousand ships. Now I don’t care who you are — -man, woman or beast , that ass is cute ! ! ! I don’t know why. It’s just a muscle. It’s a very strong muscle because it does so much work. I’m just guessing, but I think that’s why it’s called an ass. I mean to say that one should look upon the work that a beast of burden would do, that is called in ass. Then you have a look at this muscle (oogah horn) which does all the heavy lifting on our bodies. I get the correlation.
I’m Sorry Love, if you think this a cheap trick, to use sex to attract readers to what I write. if you’re thinking that — — you are damn straight………….My mama didn’t raise no fool. You too can use whatever tools you can think of and so should I. The only thing is, every time I throw down the gauntlet, you scare the crap out of me with your reply. When this literary battle, so to speak, is over, we should meet on the battlefield and smoke cigars and drink champagne and tell war stories. The only problem is that will never happen because these stories will never ever stop. — — — — I’m dying to see what you write to me next. I believe you are number 10.
Hold on tight there, my buddy, Ossmagoo! Ok, that’s a made-up word.
Let’s just let our audience decide now. I think I have much better muscle presented here. What do you think? My love followers?
I’m not sure that muscle you presented shows any sensuality whatsoever.
Let’s discuss sensuality, shall we?
A wet, drizzled six-pack becomes the ultimate symbol of sensuality, a true embodiment of desire and attraction. The raindrops evokes a primal instinct, awakening desires that lie dormant and igniting passionate flames.
Midnight, the author with the most claps between Letters #9 and #10, wins this round.
James, you also wrote:
There is a thing, I love about women. Women know how to be selectively objective. I can show this image to any woman and ask if she would rate whether or not that would be a good looking ass. I would ask you Love, on a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate that ass?
Some might simply say, I think that is a very nice derrière. A few might say, look at all that peach fuzz. I would shave that off if I was her . Some might say that it pooches out too far. You’re not always going to get a good objective critique from a woman because there could be jealousy. I mean jealousy can cloud judgment, am I right? I mean, in my opinion, this ass is a 10. Every woman in the world is wondering how their ass measures up.I can almost hear the frantic clattering of mirrors as I speak. This is where you need to take a man’s point of view. If your man loves you, I guarantee he is going to love your ass. This is a way better direction then — — — you have a great ass, so therefore, I now love you.
Nobody but nobody can have the above ass. The girl that is the proud owner of that ass is going to chew you up and spit you out if you get close to “it”. Everybody, men, some women, children, dogs, farm animals are going to want that ass. Don’t ask me why. It’s not like you could possess it. You can’t eat it, but you can bite it. (Oh, if only…………as he bites his bottom lip while making sucking air sounds) You are constantly going to be having your idiot bird-dog friends trying to get near to that.
James, maybe the question should start with? Are you into ass…ets?
Compared to muy bonita ass, that’s quite hairy, I think, but I can’t judge anyone’s taste for assets. LOL. It’s a cute one. Not one I’d like; I like the muscular features of one. HAHAHA.
Honestly, I would take a hopeless romantic who is vulnerable and honest with their feelings that loves me for everything that I am over any physical attribute, any day.
Then you wrote: When I was a kid, I had a swimming pool, and some guys would only show up in the summer. I called them my “fair-weather” friends. You really need to be suspicious of your friends who don’t care so much for you, but they put up with you because they are your “your wife has a great ass “friends. They wish you would die so they can have that ass. Men have no moral code at all. When they have a drink and a look, I turn into a complete idiot. (oops) I mean “they” … Such a girl should be named Fanny. Songs could be written about how everybody wants to kiss my Fanny. If you think a girl can open a door with just a smile she can also do it with a great ass. I’m going to tell you something about men. Just looking at that thing, gives me surges in oxytocin and every other “tocin” that a guy has.
It is not a matter of intelligence, that was put into us by nature. Men should not be judged because they turn into complete idiots when they see a beautiful derrière and get glassy eyed and began to drool. That was put into us by nature, so it’s God’s wish that men act like idiots around that thing which will burn your fingers bad if we dare to touch it. Some men would look at that and fall completely in love.
The woman could be a serial killer but that’s okay. We’ll work out all those tiny little problems later. Meanwhile, I love your ass. If women knew what guys were thinking when they see a great ass, they would never stop slapping us. Once I heard somebody ask somebody else why they stayed with the person that was hurting them so badly…. She answered, why not be honest, she has a really great ass.
OMG. I have heard that before from my male and female friends.
But then, when the relationship goes south, just because it does gain attention from everyone, your relationship troubles start.
I once had a very jealous lover. Every time we went out to dinner or to the movies, he would be so worked up because all he was seeing were other people looking at that long, dark hair on my buttocks. C’mon, you know you are with someone who is attractive; you better already know everyone wants to have the same. So be forewarned. There is no sense in getting fussy about everything.
I cannot get over why partners get jealous about other people looking at who you’re with. I would be looking proud and ecstatic that I was with such an attractive being, with an attractive behind. Get over it and it’s all mine. HAHAHA. That’s what I would think whenever I saw someone drool over my date.
Then you wrote:
I fell down on my butt the other day. I asked my wife to take a picture , so I could see how badly I was bruised. That’s when I got a good look at my ass. To think I might be only judged on the gorgeousness of my ass is so demoralizing. .I’m going to have to write a poem called –” My Ass, my ass, what ever — became of my ass” I realize now, just how much my wife loves me. Not only did she look directly at the ass, but she accepts my ass, just as it is right now, and even took a photograph of it, and she didn’t even fall “out of love” with me. I mean as asses go, my ass is definitely raggedy. If you have a raggedy ass and your mate still loves you, that is true love baby. I stand tall among my fellow man and I’m proud and I hold my head up high and I wear my formidable ass with extreme pride with the knowledge that I am master of my domain. You want to know my reason — I owe it all to assology. Yes, that’s right. I owe everything I am, all that I’ve achieved through studying the technical aspects of excellent asses Versus regular garden-variety asses.
I absolutely love your wife too!!! It is good to know someone out there loves your asset, James. LOL.
Now, there are some good-looking garden variety assets too, I think?
James, you ended our letter with:
There ya go Love.. As you can see, I will do anything I can to grab all of the fame and fortune and adoration of all of the millions of people that are reading our back-and-forth correspondence. People will see my story about asses and they will see me as such a humanitarian working for the good of all mankind. Protection from the scourge of a beautiful ass is a danger that should be addressed . I mean when you think about it, when people read this they’re going to stop worrying about what their ass looks like. All of the cute assed people can just go shopping for space panties, because they think their asses out of this world. All of those people are a bunch of ass hats anyway.
— -just because
Ok, James….drumroll….please….
I do still think, the wet six-pack creates such an intoxicating symphony of sensations. I don’t know if an ass gives me the same emotional desires.
I shall let our audience decide.
Let’s see who wins this match…shall we?
This is James’ Butt Naked letter #9 to Love
Here are all our previous letters: Check them out, James is hilarious, I couldn’t stop laughing…
Lastly, please continue to join Francisco Iglesias, publication called Inside the Mind of a Writer: