Punch Me in The Gut: Keys to Edgy Writing

In a world where writing is so bland, we need to find a way to differentiate from the crowd.

Boring!

If your first sentence looks like this I am going to bash my head against the wall.

For starters, it’s exactly how ChatGPT writes.

Congratulations you are a Chatbot.

Punch me in the gut. I need it. Surprise me with something. Hit a nerve early on. Say something that pisses me off.

You suck

See that pissed you off, didn’t it? I wouldn’t suggest always starting with that.

Mind reeling with possible article titles

You can make a bold controversial claim. Challenge conventional wisdom, and state an opinion that bucks the mainstream.

I know people who eat cereal with water.

WTF that’s disgusting. It got your attention though, and pulled at your emotional strings.

Revulsion is an emotion.

Sometimes we need to write something brash and unforgiving. Breaking rules and pissing people off. Everyone else is trying to fall into the cookie cutter and become the next guru to sell you a course.

You need to break shit and piss people off to stand out.

Here are a few ways to stand out with edgy writing

Break rules

It’s important to break the rules. Every great writer does it one way or another. The key to breaking rules is understanding them. Ignorance is no excuse for the law.

Robbing a bank because you are an idiot who didn’t know you were in the bank is not impressive. Knowing you could end up in real life kick-ass scene from the movie Heat is a different story.

Learning grammar, punctuation, and a vast vocabulary is the key to becoming a great outlaw writer.

Breaking them because we are too dumb or lazy to take the time to learn them is not the same.

That last sentence is pointing the finger at myself

Cuss sparingly

I am a sailor and a chef. So double fucked. Now I am a preschool teacher.

Dangerous.

When I first started teaching I thought there would be no way I could make it a day without saying something inappropriate.

After all, being a degenerate foul-mouthed asshole was what got me to where I was in life.

Surprisingly, I found it easy to turn it off.

I have to do that now as well. The occasional F bomb or dirty word is fine. The key is not to rely on them as your main form of communication and emphasis.

Opinions are like assholes

We all have them, they stink, and we can’t help but want to put our noses in other people’s.

Yeah don’t lie, we’ve all been there.

Sometimes putting your opinions out into the world is important. We’ve all heard the saying, “you shouldn’t talk about religion or politics at the dinner table.”

Well, this ain’t the dinner table.

I am the first to admit I keep my politics to myself unless I am reading someone’s work that has a similar disposition as me.

I have commented on people's stories I am in disagreement with.

I was immediately hit with ad hominem insults.

That’s because if you think differently than I do about politics you are an idiot. Only idiots fail to debate a subject on its merit and attack the person in the debate.

See what I did there?

I stated a controversial opinion. Sometimes it’s the thing you need to do to get people talking by pulling at their emotions.

The truth hurts

Sometimes the dick punch we need is the truth. I admire writers who don’t hold back when they call out their readers by pointing out the truth.

For example,

Nobody reads your writing because it sucks. Here is why.

Nobody cares what you have to say because what you say is stupid. Say this instead.

You will never be a successful writer because you refuse to do what it takes. This is what it takes.

I’ve read great writers that say this. These statements precede ways to fix the problems and I admire that.

They took the risk of hurting their readers’ feelings. It broke them out of the haze reminding them they were not special.

We are all on here scratching for claps and comments.

We have to do the work to be different.

Find Balance

As with everything we need to find a balance. We all love to read the occasional edgy material but if it’s all you write it will get old fast.

There is a side of me, the sailor chef that screams to be a dick.

Another side of me is the sarcastic teenager. He needs to shroud his insecurities with veiled humor.

Whatever the case may be do not rely on this type of thing to carry you.

It's good to be able to throw a good jab at your reader's nose. We need it to break out of our comfort zones.

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