Player 1 and 2: On Differing Friendship Stances
a poem
Enter Player 1: someone who balances both their own needs and someone else’s needs so that some kind of common goal is reached.
Enter Player 2: someone who prioritizes their needs and will fuck over someone else if they find that something doesn’t meet their needs.
From Player 1’s point of view, Player 2 may seem selfish, not caring about some common goal and not willing to ever make compromises in a balanced, reciprocal way.
From Player 2’s point of view, Player 1 is needy, and should just fill their own cup first before asking or interacting with anyone else because the way Player 2 manages themselves is to always fill their own cup before ever considering anyone else.
At the end of the day I’ve encountered too many issues where I’d expected Player 2 people to be more like Player 1; or else expecting Player 1 people to be more like Player 2, but often invisible to me is that someone being Player 1 or Player 2 often is defined by some invisible expectation relative to where I am on that spectrum.
And maybe I can leave without shaming someone who is more like Player 2 than I am, for not meshing well with me, seemingly the Player 1, because kind as they are, cool as they are, these interactions flow in different directions.
And similarly, with yet others, I am more like Player 1, and I fault others for being Player 2.
I think sometimes, under bigger circumstances, some might change; but to assume change is the only solution may be folly.
Sometimes, the only solution is to party ways, distanced so that both of us can find someplace that feels closer to home.
That’s why sometimes goodbyes can be good.
We needed it, after all.
Writing Prompt: Do you ever “do and then ask for forgiveness”
Inviting Josie Elbiry | Jay Krasnow | Sharing Randomly | Jay Krasnow | Divina Grey | Tatum Hamernik | Kristen Stark | Tree Langdon | Noah Levy| Jimmy Misner Jr. | if you’re up to it and anyone else interested to smash that writer’s block, join in on this tiny challenge and write a response, wherever it takes you! It can be a tiny poem, a shortform piece or an essay — whatever comes into that brain noodle!
Hi I’m Lucy Dan 蛋小姐 (she/her/她) and I used to be such a rule follower that I always just did or didn’t do based on the rules. And then I realized, some things in life don’t follow rules. Or rules that apply to one person don’t apply to others. Sometimes, that difference is due to inequality of how rules are applied to each person. Yet other times, that’s due to natural varying differences in the world. Again, I’m still learning. PS, I published a book of tiny poems!
^ by Thalia Dunn
