Permission to Proceed

Summary

The text reflects on the profound impact of bell hooks' writing, particularly her work "Where We Stand," which grants the author a sense of permission to acknowledge feelings of disconnection and to move forward without guilt.

Abstract

The author describes an intangible, deeply personal feeling that accompanies new experiences, especially in professional settings where a lack of connection is felt. This sensation remains elusive, resisting simple explanations, and is likened to an "organizationist's" intuition. The author finds solace and empowerment in bell hooks' prose from her book "Where We Stand," which resonates on a personal level, offering a liberating perspective on detachment. The phrase "permission to proceed" encapsulates the author's realization that it's acceptable to feel untethered and to act on that feeling by moving on. The author expresses gratitude for hooks' words, which provide comfort and guidance in navigating the complexities of professional life and beyond.

Opinions

The author identifies with the term "organizationist," suggesting a deep engagement with the professional world.
There is an appreciation for the power of words, particularly those of bell hooks, to transcend their original context and provide personal insight.
The author feels that the inability to connect with certain environments is not a personal failing but a natural occurrence, a view reinforced by hooks' writing.
The sentiment is conveyed that strong, impactful writing should resonate with the reader's individual needs and experiences.
The author expresses a profound sense of gratitude towards bell hooks for the permission and comfort her words provide in dealing with feelings of disconnection.

An ode to the indomitable, incomparable bell hooks

Image: Carlos Alberto Gómez Iñiguez/Unsplash

There is a feeling, sometimes. And though I call it a feeling, I can’t quite put my finger on it or even describe it. I suppose that’s the purpose of a feeling, no? To describe the indescribable?

Let’s call this a feeling of a feeling — one you can’t explain, but it’s there, deep and in your bones. You feel it, but only you feel it. Were you a computer, you could plug someone in and they, too, might feel it.

But machines we are not.

This feeling-feeling is an experience I repeat with many new adventures. I consider myself an organizationist — someone whose life revolves around the notions of professional work life.

And, sometimes, I get that feeling-feeling as I make my way through various businesses and companies, most often experienced as the impending sense of lacking connections.

I can’t always (sometimes ever) explain why. It could be the people or the environment or the work itself. But, sometimes, the inability to forge a bond with a place is deep and heavy.

So it was, often, until I read bell hooks’ incomparable Where We Stand. For all its difficult, glorious words, one line in particular stopped me, cold, and sent me out of my body and mind:

“We tried to give this house memories, but it refused to contain them. Impenetrable, the concrete would not hold our stories.”

In hooks’ brief phrasing, I found a permission, of sorts. A permission to realize that I don’t need to feel badly about feeling untethered. A permission to not simply realize this, but to move on.

A permission to proceed.

hooks, of course, was not speaking of business or professional life. But that is where I felt it. And that is the purpose of strong words, in my view — to meet the recipient where they need it.

I have kept her permission with me anytime I feel the heavy feeling-feeling of uncertainty, and lean into it with care. I will always be grateful to her for that. For so many things, but especially that.

Rest easy, pathbreaking bell.