Parent of the Year

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Abstract

fed, clothed and you shield them from the truth. Your abuser ensures they have control over you. Probably your finances too, better buy new shoes at Asda (because your old ones had a hole in) so the abuser thinks the money was spent on food and it therefore won’t create an inquest. The abuser has you under their control now and despite feeling desperate, frightened and alone, you continue because you now believe them that you’re worthless and no one else would want you or…..</li><li>You’re lucky enough to have one friend left, perhaps a secret friend because you’ve been isolated from all the rest. That friend helps you escape with the children, or you build up enough courage on your own to escape and finally be free, but then Family Court rears it’s ugly head. You find yourself scared for your children’s welfare so you apply for a Child Arrangement Order. In court you’re a nervous wreck, it’s bad enough on it’s own but when your abuser has decided to follow you and put in a counter claim it feels a million times worse, and then appears…..</li></ul>….Parent of the Year. Yep, your abuser isn’t shaking with fear like you are, they’re as calm as can be, they can articulate whi

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lst you struggle to put a sentence together. They tell the judge how they’ve been a loving parent since they were born when in reality they spent their free time on the Xbox or PlayStation. They tell the judge how their children have a special bond with them, when in fact the only bond they actually have is one where they’ve seen the follow up toLove Actually, Hate Actually. They’ve seen that sly slap across the face from the corner of their eye, they’ve heard the shouting, seen the abuse and occasionally felt the force themselves when they do something horrendously wrong like blow bubbles into a drink through a straw, we can’t have that sort of behaviour can we? Loving bond, my arse!They make out that they’re Parent of the Year, they make the judge believe they can do no wrong. The judge awards 50/50 shared care, so now the children you were trying to protect from the abuser will spend 50% of the time with the abusive parent.Lovely jubbly, the children are safe now aren’t they. As long as they don’t blow bubbles in their drink that is. Parent of the Year in front of the judge, scumbag of the year when they get home!</article></body>

Parent of the Year

The title says it all really, Parent of the Year is a by-product of almost every Child Arrangement Order hearing.

What the hell do I mean? Sounds like I’m talking nonsense doesn’t it? How can the phrase Parent of the Year be a by-product of a court case? It’s simple really, now let’s see how many of you recognise this story.

An abusive partner spends years making you feel like you’re worthless, ugly, thick, stupid, the list could go on. Whether the abuse is physical or mental, as a victim, you will all recognise these feelings. Whilst grinding you down to the point at which you almost give up on life itself, they are forming a plan, one which could go either way and it doesn’t matter to them which way it goes. These are the two outcomes that I’m sure you’ll recognise;

You continue on for the sake of your children (or at least that’s what you are made to feel like), you’re ensuring your children are fed, clothed and you shield them from the truth. Your abuser ensures they have control over you. Probably your finances too, better buy new shoes at Asda (because your old ones had a hole in) so the abuser thinks the money was spent on food and it therefore won’t create an inquest. The abuser has you under their control now and despite feeling desperate, frightened and alone, you continue because you now believe them that you’re worthless and no one else would want you or…..
You’re lucky enough to have one friend left, perhaps a secret friend because you’ve been isolated from all the rest. That friend helps you escape with the children, or you build up enough courage on your own to escape and finally be free, but then Family Court rears it’s ugly head. You find yourself scared for your children’s welfare so you apply for a Child Arrangement Order. In court you’re a nervous wreck, it’s bad enough on it’s own but when your abuser has decided to follow you and put in a counter claim it feels a million times worse, and then appears…..

….Parent of the Year. Yep, your abuser isn’t shaking with fear like you are, they’re as calm as can be, they can articulate whilst you struggle to put a sentence together. They tell the judge how they’ve been a loving parent since they were born when in reality they spent their free time on the Xbox or PlayStation. They tell the judge how their children have a special bond with them, when in fact the only bond they actually have is one where they’ve seen the follow up to

Love Actually, Hate Actually. They’ve seen that sly slap across the face from the corner of their eye, they’ve heard the shouting, seen the abuse and occasionally felt the force themselves when they do something horrendously wrong like blow bubbles into a drink through a straw, we can’t have that sort of behaviour can we? Loving bond, my arse!

They make out that they’re Parent of the Year, they make the judge believe they can do no wrong. The judge awards 50/50 shared care, so now the children you were trying to protect from the abuser will spend 50% of the time with the abusive parent.

Lovely jubbly, the children are safe now aren’t they. As long as they don’t blow bubbles in their drink that is. Parent of the Year in front of the judge, scumbag of the year when they get home!