Paper Wedding

Is that easy to tear?

I am writing this text in the middle of the week I completed 1 year of marriage. I looked up over the internet how they called the 1st wedding anniversary thing. I found it to be Paper Wedding. Could it be that the nomenclature was due to the inexperience of such a recent marriage? It may be, it even makes sense.

After that first year of marriage, I decided to revisit some Instagram posts that I had made a week before the big day and I found several fun things. I decided to compile these posts and some photos of our pre-wedding made by Hope Tree Fotografia. Let’s see how it was one year ago?

All the text I wrote right after the pictures, and it’s not italic are words written a year ago.

Post 01 ➤ 11 days before the big day

I think I hadn’t yet realized what was about to happen in 11 days

We as humans are usually afraid of the unknown. That becomes more and more real as time passes and we have more experience in life.

New job, new house, marriage … All these things can cause strangeness to the human being, of course, there is also the butterflies in the stomach feeling. The new is not all bad, that adrenaline rush of not knowing how it will be, that desire to change what you have in the possibility that it can be much better than you got. That just fascinates me. I am a creative guy, I don’t like routine, sameness, I get tired of some things easily but I confess that the new scares even me sometimes.

I mean, that’s all part of the incredible journey that we have here on Earth, this journey that we call life. Don’t be afraid to embrace the new, it scares you sometimes but in the end, it changes the status quo, it makes us want to evolve, improve, fight for our dreams, and after each step, there is one more.

Post 02 ➤ 10 days before the big day

I had not yet realized but I was really busy with work

A lot of people believe in soulmates, right? Depending on your belief, you give it another name. I am a Christian and Christians usually say that God prepares a special someone for each of us. I am a little skeptical about all of this and I believe that God does not interfere in any of this, He allows us to make choices based on what we have as principles, His own.

I believe that two people know each other, align their principles, purposes, expectations, and plans for the future. These two beings strive and then yes, with God’s help they manage to make it work.

Each brings its defects and qualities and they complete each other. Kind of like a puzzle, but two people who are already complete. Confusing, right? Well yeah.

Post 03 ➤ 7 days before the big day

Vacation from work and my mind was completely occupied by what would happen within a week

Relationships have been in crisis for a while now. It has now been easier for people to simply not commit. Trusting each other is shaken by so many disappointments but I believe the fault is on the selfishness of our times. Relationships don’t just mean happiness, enjoyment, good things in general. It is a lot of hard work, it involves renunciation, respect, friendship, and love.

They say that the eyes are the window to the soul, right? Is that why people don’t want to look at each other in the eye anymore? Well, to make a relationship work you will have to do it. You’ll have to open up and be vulnerable. Scary, right? Nobody likes this state of vulnerability.

No relationship is perfect, but with a lot of effort and dedication from both parties, it can work. And if the goals are the same, there is no reason to be afraid.

I would like to make a small comment here. On the day I published this, a dear friend of mine was very offended by the first paragraph, saying that he was one of those people I called selfish.

I did not want, in any way, to offend anyone. I just said that selfishness is one of the reasons why people refuse to make commitments today. This does not mean that this is the main reason, much less the only one.

Post 04 ➤ 04 days before the big day

I was still calm despite the proximity of the wedding

A couple’s tattoo? WTF?

This is usually wrong, right? Erasing people’s names from the forearm must be one of the most common types of jobs that the tattoo removing people receive. We didn’t write anyone’s name on our arms but something that made complete sense to both of us.

Paula and I have the same birthday. I’m serious. I mean, it’s four years apart but we both celebrate our birthday on July 22nd. How many same birthday couples do you know?

I had never been very excited about my birthday before, it was never a big deal for me. Just one less day on our journey through this land, right?

Well, Paula influenced me to appreciate that day more and be grateful for it. Understanding that we survived another year and that is a blessing, after all, many people in the world did not. Anyway, it is interesting to have a birthday party on the same day as my girlfriend, you know? Now let’s see what it will be like to have it on the same day as my wife.

For the horoscope people, we are identical in somethings here are things that we are completely different. I know they will find some ascendant to justify astrology but the fact is “you are part of the massive cultural disillusionment that the apparent position of the sun in relation to the constellations, at the time of your birth, affects your personality in some way.” #joke

Post 05 ➤ The day before the big day

Despite being a very calm guy, I was a nervous wreck when I posted this

Today is my last day as a single man. Tomorrow I end my day married to the woman of my life. It is very crazy to think about it because we have been waiting for this moment for a long time and it has finally arrived.

It is interesting to see how much we have evolved, grown, and achieved together. And starting tomorrow we begin our family. We still have a lot to evolve, grow, and achieve. This is just the first step of this journey that will not be easy but it will be incredible!

This would not be possible without grace, which is the trace that impresses me the most in the character of God.

Today, a year after I wrote all this, without knowing what the experience of marriage really was, just empirical observation, I don’t know why we waited so long. We dated for 3 years, which is not a lot for some people but for us it was enough to make the best decision of our lives.

Well, I speak for myself, right? If you want to know about my dear wife, just ask her by clicking on her name: Paula Xavier