Outwit Your Inner Saboteur
Overcome the limitations that arise from the archetype of self-doubt
Every move you make opens a whole new world of possibilities…In chess, as in life, possibility is the basis of everything. Every hope, every dream, every regret, every moment of living…never underestimate the big importance of small things.”
“The Midnight Library” by Matt Haig.
There we go again
We’ve fallen into a trap we set specifically for ourselves: just when we might break through to some new plateau in our work or personal life, we do or say something that prevents it from happening.
Or, perhaps we sabotage ourselves through inaction — the contest we didn’t enter, the message we didn’t send, the invite we didn’t accept, the job we didn’t apply for.
Maybe we talked ourselves out of it because we didn’t think we were good enough, ready enough, or deserving enough. Or perhaps we jumped too quickly and submitted our proposal, résumé, or business plan before it was fully finalized. And somewhere inside us, we knew it.
I have a life-long habit of focusing intently on a project until I get to the final details. For example, I’ll spend a lot of time writing an article only to misspell the editor’s name in my pitch. In that very last minute of choice, I’ve self-sabotaged what could’ve been a great opportunity.
A denier/obstructor/trickster like this lives within each of us. It’s part of our makeup as human beings.
Meet your inner saboteur.
The Saboteur archetype
An archetype (“arche”= original/origin; “type” = model/pattern) is an expression of a particular kind of energy we all recognize when we hear it. Many archetypes survive through time (Magician), others emerge in only certain cultures or times (MAGA), and some eventually fall out of common usage (Scribe).
Archetypes are familiar to all of us, even if we’re not familiar with the word. We use them regularly in conversation whether we’re aware of it or not. Think of how we use the words fool, bully, princess, or knight-in-shining-armor in conversation. An archetype invokes an image, an energy, that we immediately associate with certain behaviors and ways of being.
The game pieces in chess — King, Queen, Knight, Bishop, Rook, Pawn — are perfect examples of archetypes. Each performs specific expected roles and has defined strengths and weaknesses. To win at chess, one must be aware of the strengths and weaknesses of all the pieces on the game board.
To win in life (succeed in our goals), we maximize the strengths of the archetypes that are on our side of the board while minimizing their weaknesses. At the same time, we minimize the strengths and exploit the weaknesses of the pieces sitting across from us.
We all have the Saboteur archetype as part of our psyche, though it manifests differently for each of us. It is one of the four core archetypes, along with Victim, Child, and Prostitute (according to Caroline Myss, we have 12 total).
The Saboteur is formed out of fear, self-doubt, lack of self-esteem, or unworthiness. It is also shaped by conditioned beliefs that tell us what we can and can’t do or be in this world — based on our upbringing, race, sex, or any other factor.
The Saboteur creates limits based on these imagined fears of our power (fear of success) or our perceived lack of worthiness (fear of failure).
Consider the Saboteur one of the trickiest pieces on the gameboard to outmaneuver — and it’s sitting right across from you. Our goal in outwitting it begins with understanding how it moves.
How to outwit your Saboteur
Study your Saboteur
We can’t change what we don’t know or refuse to look at. Like a shadow, the Saboteur moves and works in darkness. It confounds us when we’re not looking. It trips us up when we’re distracted.
Turn the lights on, keep your focus, be blindingly honest, and it’s easy to see and face the problem.
Are you a procrastinator? Perfectionist? Self-doubter?
Do you overpromise? Create impossible deadlines? Micromanage? Overschedule?
Whatever it is, write it down. Laugh about it. Remove all shame and judgment around your self-sabotaging tactics. Remember that the Saboteur is an archetype that lives within each of us. No successful human has become so without first facing, and then outwitting, their inner Saboteur.
Watch closely to how your Saboteur moves…and when.
Listen to how you talk to yourself when you’re putting yourself or your work out in the world.
Does your saboteur tell you you don’t deserve success? That you’re not ready?
Does your saboteur tell you someone else would be better? Smarter? More clever?
Listen to yourself when you fail.
Do you beat yourself up, fall into victim mode, or blame someone/something else?
Do you make excuses?
Do you tell yourself you’ll never try again because it’s not worth the time or energy?
Once you start paying attention to your self-talk during these critical times, you’ll be able to negate them before they can generate power. You’ll say hello to your saboteur as you would an old friend.
And then you’ll move on, ’cause you’ve got shit to do and no time to plan a pity party.
That habit I have of not checking the finer details? If I want something badly enough, I insist that I hold off until I can double and triple-check my work. No matter how excited I am or prepared I feel — I wait or prepare one more day. It doesn’t mean I always outwit my Saboteur, but it works more often than not.
Play in traffic
Reflect on your greatest successes, and you’ll find one constant: you took a risk. You reached out to a stranger. You submitted your work, your business plan, your profile.
Too many of us stand at the crosswalk and wait for the light to turn green. We’ve been raised to be polite, wait our turn, and our Saboteur is quite happy to keep us waiting on the curb. It whispers, “Not now, not yet,” but what it really means is “Not ever.”
This is our life, and sometimes, we have to get in the street and play in traffic. We have to make some noise, get in the way, make a scene, cause a traffic jam. Dare to be seen, to be honked at, to be criticized. You might worry over what others will think, but chances are, you’ll be admired by those still standing on the curb and respected by those playing in traffic along with you.
Generally, by the time your Saboteur realizes you’re out playing in traffic and taking risks, you’re already on the next street over.
(For metaphorical purposes only. Please obey all traffic signals, and look both ways before crossing the street!)
Practice makes…habits
Outwitting your Saboteur doesn’t always have to mean doing the really hard stuff right away. We can build up the needed courage to take risks by taking on small, easily attainable projects where we can immediately see results and get a sense of accomplishment. Doing small but risky things every day soon becomes a habit, and then a way of life — even an archetype as clever as the Saboteur has difficulty breaking up well-established habits.
Once we have created a habit out of risk-taking, we strip the power away from the Saboteur. But keep an eye on it, because the Saboteur will shapeshift as you do.
Empower your intuition and self-trust
The Saboteur demands proof. Money-back guarantees. It demands reasoning, logic, and explanations.
But great creativity doesn’t come with guarantees.
We don’t always know where we’re going yet. We’re just following our gut. We can trust that the bridge will manifest beneath our feet just when we need it.
Be patient. Build through trial and error. Welcome chaos and confusion.
Putting ourselves out there is inherently risky. But the worst that can happen is failure, which in creator language is nothing more than a chance to try again with that much more experience. Trust yourself enough that you can handle whatever comes — whether overwhelming success, agonizing failure, or something in the middle.
We are all hardwired for success in this lifetime. We each have a unique combination of skills, talents, and desires that can bring satisfaction, joy, and success to our lives.
The Saboteur is here to challenge that success. The Saboteur’s role is to ensure that we never find out how powerful we’d be if we broke free of our self-imposed limitations.
We outwit our Saboteur by studying how it plays the game. In chess and in life, as long there’s a pawn still fighting for your King, you’re in the game to win.