avatarDona Mwiria

Summary

The article discusses the cultural phenomenon of "dick pics," exploring the reasons behind men sending unsolicited pictures of their genitalia, the psychological impact on recipients, and the legal implications of this behavior.

Abstract

The article "Our Love-Hate Relationship With Dick Pics" delves into the prevalent yet controversial practice of men sending unsolicited photos of their genitals, a trend facilitated by modern technology. It highlights that while approximately 80% of men and 50% of women have received such images, the act is often driven by male narcissism and sexism, with men overestimating women's interest in receiving nude imagery. The piece underscores the negative emotional responses from recipients, including feelings of disrespect, shame, and anger. However, it also acknowledges that a small percentage of women and a significant portion of gay and bisexual men report positive reactions to dick pics. The article concludes by advising that the consensual exchange of intimate photos can be acceptable within relationships but warns of the increasing legal consequences of sending unsolicited dick pics, which are being recognized as a form of sexual harassment.

Opinions

  • The article suggests that men who send unsolicited dick pics often do so under the misconception that women will respond with sexual interest, reflecting a projection of their own desires.
  • It is implied that the anonymity provided by dick pics, typically not showing the sender's face, contributes to the prevalence of this behavior.
  • The article conveys that unsolicited dick pics are a form of cyber-flashing and can be psychologically impactful, causing distress to recipients.
  • Research psychologists are cited, indicating that men who send unsolicited dick pics exhibit higher levels of narcissism and endorse greater ambivalent and hostile sexism.
  • The piece expresses that while some individuals may be aroused or entertained by dick pics, the majority of women feel disrespected and violated, which is a significant concern.
  • The author's stance is clear in advising against sending unsolicited dick pics, emphasizing the importance of consent and the growing legal ramifications of such actions.

Our Love-Hate Relationship With Dick Pics

Men have flaunted their junk since time immemorial, is it really such a big deal now?

Image by the author on Canva

He messaged to tease that he was in his drawers. “I wish you’d snap your fingers and be here,” he said. “Oh, what I would do to skip work and have you.”

After a couple of back and forth texts, she turned over her phone and covered her titillating distraction with her scarf–out of sight is out of mind, right. She returned to work, responding to emails, setting appointments, and monitoring experiments.

A few minutes later, her supervisor showed up at her desk asking about the symposium she’d attended last week. Let me show you pictures, she said excitedly.

With him standing eagerly over her, she unlocked her phone. Whatsapp messenger came on, and up sprang a palm-sized picture of her boyfriend’s hard-on.

There was no way out of this…

“Oh my God!” her supervisor said, turning around like he was doing the infamous Michael Jackson spin. “I’m sorry!” she squealed as she fumbled exiting Whatsapp Messenger. “I didn’t ask for that, I’m as surprised as you .”

Without letting him respond, she continued rambling, incoherent apologies and excuses. To her, this was more embarrassing than the time she accidentally swiped right and matched with the intern she was to work with for the next six months.

Total panic set in; her face was burning.

He put his hand on her shoulder. “Relax, it’s just an eggplant.” Oh dear God! She laughed nervously. “Glad to see you eat your veggies, he said with a smirk. At that point, she was ready to crawl under the desk and evaporate into thin air.

“No, no, noooo I’m not impressed by it at the moment,” she whispered.

She grabbed her phone with sweaty palms and re-entered the password hoping the app closed and the dick pic would never pop up again. She held her breath and exhaled a sigh of relief when the phone came to life, and no dick was in sight.

Men have been flaunting their junk since time immemorial, whether consensual or not. We’ve admired them on ancient Roman graffiti. We’ve noticed them carved on desks and tree trunks. We’ve seen exaggerated dick drawings on school lockers and bathroom cubicles.

Today men’s bare genitals are so popular and explicit— all thanks to technology — that 80 % of men and almost 50% of women reported receiving a “dick pic.” But why is this so?

Researchers discovered that men overestimate women’s interest in receiving nude imagery based on their receptivity in reversed roles. Meaning dick pics are often men projecting their sexual desires in hopes that they will be reciprocated.

Somewhere in the male psyche, they think by showing off their glorious member, you’ll go into a sexual frenzy, exchange a few nudes and raunchy texts, till it all becomes too much that you insist on meeting immediately (sound like a porno script). This has given rise to cyber-flashing, which means sending obscene pictures to strangers.

The growing trend of cyber-flashing is no surprise; unlike the nude selfies of women that often show their face, the dick pic tends to be from the waist down — presenting an air of anonymity. This is a problem because men don’t need to be as discerning as women.

The majority of men have confessed to sending dick pics to multiple respondents — this strategic move is made to increase the chances of someone responding favorably with minimal investment from men.

But what about the psychological impact on those who receive it? Women reported feeling disrespected, shame, anger, disgust, and shock.

Do these men even care?

Research Psychologists at Pennsylvania State University look into it and found rather peculiar traits in men who send unsolicited dick pics to women.

“We determined that men who send unsolicited dick pics demonstrated higher levels of narcissism and endorsed greater ambivalent and hostile sexism than their non-sending counterparts,”

Interestingly enough, not everyone had a problem with dick pics. 7.5% of heterosexual women and 12% of bisexual women reported feeling aroused by at least one unsolicited dick pic they received.

While 44% of men reported being “entertained” and 41% reported feeling “curious” after receiving a dick pic. More Gay and bisexual men using dating apps like Grindr were more receptive to dick pics — whether solicited or unsolicited.

In conclusion

A dick pic can work for you or against you. It’s honestly a gamble. However, the best you can do is to know your audience. If you’re in a relationship and things are a bit stale, by all means, spice things up with intimate selfies, however, start slowly and make sure the dick pic is wanted and consensual.

For all those whose fetish is making women uncomfortable with your dick pic. I have one thing to say to you… DON’T DO IT. More and more states are criminalizing dicks pics; it’s taken as a form of sexual harassment. That should be enough for your dick to go limp and shy away from the flashing light of your camera phone.

Want to read more articles like this? Sign up for Medium through my link here or join my email list here. And if you’re feeling generous, you can buy me some coffee here. In the meantime, enjoy the two articles below:

Many men want a bigger dick but more men want a bigger load

Disney influenced our view on love and we’re all paying the price

© Dona Mwiria March 2022

Sexuality
Dick Pics
Technology
Dating
Sex Ed
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