Oops. You Did it, Again.
Another draft? Already?

DING. There goes another.
DING. And, another.
DING. And still, another.
What the hell is going on, here?
My inbox is erupting like an angry lipoma, on Dr. Pimple Popper, alerting me to the latest published Medium drafts.
As I am an editor on a couple of these publications, this is not surprising. Alerts like these, are expected and welcome. They give us a chance to support our fellow writers.
What is confounding, is the fact that so many of these drafts are coming from the same writers. Like, every five minutes, or so.
What gives, writers? How can this be? How can you be so unwaveringly productive? Is it something in your feed?
I mean, doesn’t writing (the good stuff, anyway), take introspection…the nurturing of one’s muse…a flair for articulate, thoughtfully written prose?
Or, am I just a slug? Someone who is thrilled when she is able to pump out a story a day?
While you squirt out yet another draft, I am sitting in front of a blank screen hurling silent epithets at MY muse, who is apparently, getting her nails done, or grabbing a quick bite at Taco Bell, or maybe even — fucking someone else’s muse.

I may have to kill her.
“Squirt.” I used this verb deliberately as I noticed that the majority of this tsunami of drafts is dude-driven. No offense, guys. I love every hairy-underarmed one of you. I do. You’re all cute as shit.
Most of you, anyway.
But, I have to ask, what does all your sprinting, suggest? That we women prefer to take our time, in order to get something right? That we want to feel confident about what we put out in the world, instead of pulling the trigger heedlessly?
Like a pimply-faced, sixteen-year-old kid at his first “rodeo.”
As someone who has worked under tight deadlines my whole life, I know that, when writers are under the gun, quality can suffer. I’ve seen it in my own writing. And, it’s not pretty. Sure. I made the deadline, resulting in a happy client, but, it came at the expense of my not being proud of my work. That’s a shitty feeling.
There’s no excuse for that on Medium, where we can write what we want, when we want. So, what’s the hurry?
Admittedly, I’m a bit envious, as I wish I had an endless font to draw from, but, it doesn’t work that way for me. I need to feel something. Pain. Anger. Fear. An emotional catalyst that smacks me upside the head and says, “You need to write this…now.”
Some — not all — of these spurted out stories are sloppily written. I would like to clap for them, in order to support my fellow writers, but that would be dishonest. It doesn’t help someone to let them think they’re doing a stellar job, when in reality, they need to step back, take a breath and reassess.
Look. I can take it just as well as I can dish it out. When I fuck up, and I do, call me out on it. Respectfully, of course, as I respect you and your efforts. That’s what we’re all about here: Helping one another.

The harsh reality is, one story does not a Hemingway make. Or, a hundred. It takes time to hone your craft because writing is hard as shit. And, that’s an understatement. It’s your blood, sweat and tears. Your flesh — naked and exposed for everyone to see. And, that takes balls, something we can all be proud of, here. The fact that we’re allowing others to see us for who we really are.
Again, envy factors in my writing this. I would love to drink whatever you’re drinking, eat whatever you’re eating, feel whatever you’re feeling, so that I, too, can ejaculate three stories in an hour. (Female ejaculation is a thing, by the way.) But, I can’t.
Maybe that means I suck. I don’t know.
Regardless if I suck or not, I will end here by congratulating you on your fertile imagination. I will keep on reading you, and when I enjoy what you’ve put out for the world to see, I will clap my ass off. In the meantime, I’ll be thinking about what to share, next.
Much love to you all.
DING. Shit.
Sherry McGuinn is a longtime Chicago-area writer and award-winning screenwriter. Her work has appeared in The Chicago Tribune, Chicago Sun-Times and numerous other publications. Sherry’s manager is currently pitching her newest screenplay, a drama with dark, comedic overtones and inspired by a true story.
Hope you enjoyed this piece. Here’s me, exposing me:




