One Person, You Should Immediately Ask on a Date
There is this one person that is the most important in your life and you should immediately ask this person out on a date. This person is you.
One thing you have to learn no matter if you are single, in a relationship, married or have kids is to spend quality time with yourself. It’s better to learn this late than never. Wanting to spend some time just by yourself is not selfish. You will not be able to be a good friend, partner or parent if you are constantly depending on others to have good time.
Sometimes even people that live alone don’t know how to spend time by themselves. I know people in their 20s that whenever they finish studying for college or working, they instantly start texting everyone they know to see if someone is free to hang out just because they are bored and don’t know what to do. When everyone else is busy doing their own stuff they just waste their time until someone is free to go out. It is great to go out with your friends as much as you can, but when they are busy you have to learn to send quality time by yourself.
I challenge you to pick out a day or even just an afternoon for a date with yourself. Spend this time doing the things that make you happy. Do not stay at home scrolling through social media or watching TV-shows and eating snacks all day. Go to your favorite coffee shop, go for a relaxing walk, read a book in the park, go to the cinema, eat in your favorite restaurant, go jogging or hiking if that is something you like to do. It’s your choice. It is better to go to an event or place you want to see by yourself, than to not to go at all just because your friends are busy, don’t have enough money right now or don’t want to go.
The first time I went on a date with myself was when a small cinema in my city held an event where they showed travel documentaries. I looked at the list of movies and found one I wanted to see, but when I asked my friends if someone wanted to come, they were all busy. Then I decided that I will go alone because that is better than not going at all. I dressed up, walked to the cinema, got some popcorn and watched a great movie. I was surprised to see that most of the people in the movie theater were alone, they were laughing and having a great time just like I did. In that moment I felt silly that I was afraid to go there alone. On the way back I sat on a bench in a park, put my headphones on and for more than an hour I just sat there, listening to music and thinking about some stuff I wanted to do. Since then I love spending quality time by myself. Most of the times I just take my camera and go to explore the city. I always find some little coffee shop where to sit down, slowly drink a cup of coffee and eat some delicious dessert. After I started doing that, I learned so much about myself, my interests and my values.
Many people are afraid to be alone and they are constantly looking for a relationship to feel complete. But you can’t be happy in a relationship for a long time if you are not happy while spending time by yourself. A friend of mine recently got divorced after 20 years of marriage. During all those years she spent her time working, doing housework, taking care of her family and going out with her friends. Whenever she went shopping or somewhere else, she took her child with her or asked a friend to go with her. She told me that after all those years she does not know how to spend time by herself and she is afraid of this. She was even ready to compromise and live with a person who does not love her, just not to be alone. And no one should be in that position. No matter if you are 15 or 50 years old you should not depend on others to make you feel complete.
Originally published at https://www.enjoylifeandtravel.com on May 1, 2020.