One Of Those Days
A Poem
It’s one of those days The ones where you don’t want to move or do anything or interact with anyone because it’s all so tiring The world spins on its axis and I want off to my own hole in the wall in a forest of my own imagination Solitude
There’s nothing wrong, per se I am neither depressed nor sad I just don’t want to do it today I want to lay somber, under covers and be quiet with myself without thinking of what I have to do or what anything means Today I don’t care about meaning I just want it to be quiet I want the world to stop
I don’t want someone to tell me about the news There is a reason I never look and it doesn’t leave me uninformed, it leaves me focused But not today Because I don’t want to focus today I actually want to unfocus so everything is blurry Including me and my life
It’s one of those days where there are things to do and even if they were the best things on Earth to do today they would still seem kind inconsequential Because nothing sounds so much better than something today The void more attractive than the present Allow me to wallow
It’s sad that people are told that these feelings are unusual or consistent with depressive episodes when it’s possible to be quite content and happy with the overall arc of your life but also want to hide in a tiny house and make dinner for yourself while starting into pine trees that want nothing from you Solitude
I don’t feel bad when I have one of these days because to me it’s a totally normal reaction to a society on technological steroids and obsessed with itself Why wouldn’t I want to power down and avoid the nonsense to save myself from another day of frenetic ennui? Another day trapped in a shirt size that runs a size too small when I want to feel the pleasure of two sizes too big so I have room to be myself It’s one of those days
© Jonathan Greene 2020
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