Self Awareness

One-Day-At-A-Time Inspiration Helps Until It Doesn’t

And then it’s guilt-inducing

I need inspiration every day, just like I need a shower. It’s part of my morning routine. I’m a fan of a morning routine, at least most of the time. I like the idea of having decisions made ahead of time when it comes to starting my day.

The critical first step of my routine has remained unchanged for decades. No talking until I’ve had my coffee. This took my husband some time to accept. He’s not generally a talkative guy — except first thing in the morning. I am generally a talkative gal — except first thing in the morning.

We’ve worked it out — in other words, he knows not to talk to me beyond “Good Morning,” until I’ve had my caffeine.

The next non-negotiable is to take Fuzz Butt for a walk. Fuzz Butt is a 14-year old Poodle whose real name is Rigby. She loves her morning walk and will bug you relentlessly until you get your shoes on.

My morning routine of coffee, silence, and dog walking goes pretty darn good and is seldom if ever guilt-inducing. Rigby does manage to guilt trip me if I indulge in a second cup of coffee, but I know better.

Next comes my one-day-at-a-time inspiration. I’ve taken to bite-sized daily inspiration, most of the time I look forward to it.

Here’s my list:

A Poem for Every Day of the Year, edited by Allie Esiri

I don’t know much about poetry and this seemed like an easy way to develop more of an understanding and an appreciation. Each day there is a brief intro to the poem’s author and some info about the poem’s origins. I usually enjoy the poems, and sometimes I even understand them.

The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman

I’m on my second year with this daily inspiration. I love this book and have been amazed that the ancient world had many of the same issues we deal with even without Twitter. Stoic philosophies still make sense today.

The Artist Way Every Day by Julia Cameron

I’m a huge Julia Cameron fan. I've worked through her seminal book, The Artist Way, twice and am considering a third run. The Artist Way Every Day affirms my creativity in bite-sized increments. What more could I ask for?

So with three daily bite-sized inspirational resources just waiting for me — what’s my problem?

My problem is when I skip a day or just happen to miss a few consecutive days — like say 30— there’s no hiding. I’m a slacker and the dated pages prove it.

I’ve considered going directly to the current date and bypassing the skipped days, but somehow that doesn’t feel right. How is it that reading a few paragraphs a day is sometimes too much for me to manage?

Lately, it has been too much for me to manage. I’ve had to catch up multiple days before I can proceed. Does that seem a tad bit OCD? Maybe.

I’m starting to rethink my devotion to my one-day-at-a-time inspiration. The entire point was to start my day on a positive note. At the moment it feels more like something I intentionally put in place to cause myself guilt.

I know myself well enough to recognize when I’m in processing mode. When things that worked stop working that usually means I’m processing. I’m not exactly sure what I’m processing — but I am sure I’m processing.

It also means it’s time to set aside my daily inspiration without guilt. The setting aside part is happening on its own — it’s the guilt part that I’m struggling with. Struggling is too strong of a word.

I’m not struggling — I’m juggling.

I’m juggling my priorities, my self-imposed priorities. I’m processing. This is not new for me, but it’s been a while since it hit me so clearly. I feel better now that I know what’s going on.

I’ll set aside my one-day-at-a-time inspiration — guilt-free — until I feel ready to pick them back up. In the meantime, I’ll experiment with juggling my morning routine — except for coffee, silence, and walking Fuzz Butt.

For the safety and sanity of those involved, some things can’t be juggled.