SENIOR HEROES
OK Boomer?
Yet we’re the ones tackling climate change
As an aging baby boomer, I’m getting a bit tired of all the criticism aimed at my generation by today’s youth. To hear them tell it, we seniors are responsible for everything from climate change to COVID-19 to fusion cuisine.
When we protest this unfair treatment, Gens X, Y and Z just laugh us off with an “OK boomer.” According to them, we’re nothing more than lazy, smug, self-entitled, lawn-obsessed parasites.
Well, I’ve had enough. It’s time to put those young whippersnappers in their place and set the record straight. When it comes to global warming, we are not the enemy. In fact, we could easily serve as a role model in how to deal with climate change.
Since most of us are now retired, we are far less of a strain on society. Far from being a negative quality, our inherent laziness is a useful weapon in the fight to save the planet.
Contrary to all the criticism, we are actually the helpful ones. Take our clothing. We wear the same old clothes day in and day out thereby avoiding the energy expended on manufacturing new ones. We simply don’t need them.
Why do we no longer mow our lawns? Yes, because we’re lazy but consider the benefits to society. Thanks to us, there’s less pollution from gas-powered mowers and more plant growth to absorb greenhouse gases.
You frequently criticize us for driving too slowly. That may be true but think of the advantages. Slower driving is more energy-efficient and environmentally responsible.
Even when we do drive, we usually don’t go far and rarely to the gym. That means more savings on gas as well as on hot water, soap and shampoo from foregone showers.
We realize some of these savings at home as well since we no longer regularly shave and shower. The reduction in water and electricity use alone is not insignificant.
On a day-to-day basis, we are less of a burden on the environment. We drink less, eat less and breathe less. That means more wine, food and oxygen for you.
Finally, we boomers are dropping like flies and returning our biomatter to the ecosystem. That sounds pretty socially responsible to me.
So stop picking on us seniors. In our unintentional indolent way, we are actually leading the charge against climate change. OK, Gen-whatever; you’re welcome.