Observations Made by the Mona Lisa while Hanging in the Louvre

Summary

The Mona Lisa reflects on her daily experiences and interactions with visitors and other artworks in the Louvre, expressing a mix of fatigue, curiosity, and desire for excitement.

Abstract

The Mona Lisa, housed in the Louvre, muses on her daily routine, observing the throngs of tourists who come to see her, the other artworks, and the occasional attempts by visitors to get a closer look or take the perfect selfie. She comments on fashion trends, the exhaustion of tourists, and the occasional art thief, all while yearning for a change of scenery or a visit from someone like Anna Wintour during fashion week. Despite her fame, she feels confined and longs for the freedom and empowerment she sees in modern women.

Opinions

The Mona Lisa is tired of the constant attention and the never-ending party of "The Wedding Feast at Cana."
She is amused and somewhat critical of the fashion choices of her visitors, particularly appreciating the return of miniskirts and go-go boots.
She is somewhat annoyed by the staring and selfie-taking habits of some visitors.
She has a dismissive attitude towards unauthorized tour guides and people who try to negotiate with guards for a better view.
She harbors a sense of adventure and wishes for experiences beyond the Louvre, such as visiting Broadway or the Metropolitan Museum of Art.
The Mona Lisa is self-conscious about her appearance, concerned about her hair and whether she's having a good hair day.
She has a strong reaction to a visitor who dresses plainly and in an old-fashioned style, reminiscent of the Renaissance era.

Observations Made by the Mona Lisa while Hanging in the Louvre

Here I am, ready for my public. It looks like the guards have the line all ready to go. 3…2…1…deep breath…here they come….

Ugh! I’m so tired! The Wedding Feast at Cana has been going on over there since 1798. Do they ever sleep? Where can I make a noise complaint? And, seriously, I haven’t been invited to their party once!

And here’s the daily parade of tourists who came to Paris just to see moi, the most popular attraction at the Louvre! I wonder if the other pieces of the art realize how lucky they are to share my company.

Ooh! Look at the skirt and those boots she’s wearing! I love it! Miniskirts must be on-trend this year. And the go-go boots are back! Love, love, love go-go boots! I wonder if I have the legs for that outfit.

And this guy…oh this must be the last stop on his travel itinerary. He looks more exhausted than I feel. Maybe he was actually AT the Wedding Feast at Cana last night.

Well, he’s really staring at…is my blouse coming down? Really? Do you have to stare at my cleavage like that? Really? My eyes are up here!

And this one wants to take a selfie from twelve feet away. Dude, you are not gonna get a good selfie from there!

Oh, who do we have here? Finally! Someone I can relate to! Someone with a sense of style. It must be fashion week again! God, I love fashion week! I wonder if Anna Wintour will come to see me again?

Who is this gentleman? Is he trying to give a tour? Yes? Yes. Here we have it again — another professor trying to give a tour of the Louvre! And here are the guards, and there he goes. Buh-Bye!

It never fails, every day someone tries to negotiate with the guards to get a closer look. You’re holding up the line! It’s not gonna happen!

Hmmm…I wonder if there are any art thieves in the house today? I could go for another adventure. Or another trip to the White House. Maybe a visit to the Metropolitan Museum of Art? Or a chance to see a show on Broadway. I heard Hamilton is pretty good.

Sometimes, my job is just soooo tedious! I mean, I realize I’m the most popular attraction here — but there must be more to life than hanging on a wall, locked behind a thick pane of glass like a bird in a gilded cage. The women who come to see me these days seem so free, and empowered! I’d settle for a trip to see the modern art wing.

Oh! How’s my hair? Can someone please tell me if I’m having a good hair day? It looks like there are some very important people coming up in the line.

OH…MY…GOD!!! Who is THAT lady? Eeeew! Look at that plain dress! Brown with an empire waist! I haven’t seen that look in centuries! And the hair, long and parted down the middle. Ugh! Is she wearing a cloak? And a veil? Yikes! She looks like she just stepped out of the Renaissance!