Not Accepting No Is Only Half the Battle

Part II is just as important

Hey peeps. Let’s get real for a sec. You’re gonna hear the word “No” a lot in your lifetime. Everyone will. Polite Nos. Big fat ugly Nos. All types of Nos. And a lot of personal growth books will tell you to say no to that no. Put in another, less confusing way, in order to succeed you’ve gotta refuse to accept rejection. Just because someone says no doesn’t mean it’s time to give up. While I agree that this is true, it’s only half the story. Let’s discuss the other half.

So what’s part II here? When someone tells you no, you gotta come up with an alternative. That’s the other part of the equation that people don’t really talk about. Listen, you can’t just say no and expect the other person to magically agree with you and be like Whoa, okay. You said no so I guess you’re right. Nope. That’s not real life, people. You’re gonna get pushback. When you say no to someone’s no, chances are they’re gonna double down on their no. Then it’s gonna be this verbal tug of war if you persist.

Instead, you’ve gotta figure something else out. I can’t think of a better way to exemplify this than by pulling an instance from Marie Forleo’s book Everything is Figureoutable, wherein she and her husband figured out a way to make their flight even after being told no by the check-in lady.

Lemme set the scene. She and her husband planned a trip to Barcelona. On the day of their flight, they were late for check-in. Apparently, they had to check their bags in at least one hour before departure, but they were running 15 minutes late. So, like most people, she and her husband hung their heads in defeat and waited for the next flight to Barcelona. Sad.

SYKE. She refused to take no for an answer. She turned to her husband and went full-on boss mode.

‘Get our boarding passes, I know we can figure this out.’

Step one: Check. More crucially, though, she came up with an alternative. She step two’d the crap out of this. Check it out.

She and her husband sprinted to the nearest luggage store and bought the biggest duffel they had. In the middle of JFK airport, they literally took all their clothes out of their suitcases and shoved them into that giant duffel. I mean, we’ve all probably seen worse at an airport, but still. That takes guts.

Step two — Find an alternative solution: FAT check. If Marie and her husband had simply said No, and stuck to their guns, going back and forth with the check-in lady who, let’s be honest, has no pull when it comes to flights, they would’ve wasted valuable time that could’ve been spent problem-solving. Because they removed the need to check any bags in, they made their flight. See the importance of step two here? Step one only gets you halfway. Step two gives you a fighting chance at the solution you want.

So remember, ladies and gents. It’s not enough to refuse rejection. That’s only half the battle. If it’s a yes that you want, you’ve gotta find a way to get there!