POETRY
Nola Gardens
“I prayed that the pain would help me grow up faster than any birthday could […]”
I prayed that the pain would help me grow up faster than any birthday could, then Dolo called me and said you’ve passed.
Wish I could bring you back so bad, that I started growing plants remember when you used to be into that?
I do. I remember Jacmel, your favela oasis.
If I could get you reincarnated, you’d come back as disciplined timing as preparation being the best revenge, as Nola Gardens; not the budding, but the scent.
As the tears I fight back with laughter, the blood I bled climbing, jumping, gliding, running, crying sweat… again
Damn, I miss your soup every New Year’s I missed your funeral because I’m negligent, sloppy and undisciplined, guised as intelligence.
I finally got what I earned; your passing before I could let you see me in a good light; working honest out the dirt
Gruhma I tried.
I tried for real this time, Dolo says I’m a short version of your husband Hope y’all get to dance again in heaven
At least reconcile over drinks, let silence answer each other’s questions, you’ll finally learn to work that link.
I’m no thug, I’m not crazy I’m your baby Son of God you’re what I need, you’ve always been, especially when you weren’t what I wanted
Know you can see this wherever you are; You were always able to see my heart, the woman that knew my lies before they helped me get laid, Now I’m able to face my scars; birthdays help celebrate the pain
Gruhma look I’m having a daughter a seed to water, as I ponder your New Year’s soup the dirt we had on each other helped us grow, inside jokes kept us cool
Wishing I could bring you back so bad, that now Ciembre ‘bout to have a girl
Goddamn this is one cruel God I serve.
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