Nobody Gets Kicked Out Of Pyramid Schemes – Except Me

Not sure I deserved that, to be honest

I had to think carefully about writing this because I’m not sure what Medium’s rules are on things like pyramid schemes. I’m obviously not advocating for them, so I think I’m going to be ok writing this. After all, I did get kicked out, so that says a lot, and I know I might get a bit of hate from people using this business model who say it isn’t a pyramid scheme.

To them I say, isn’t everything in life a pyramid, to a certain extent? You get a job, there’s a boss, some middle management and the workers at the bottom. You go to school, there’s a principal teacher, the rest of the staff and the students at the bottom. You’re growing up, and there’s a parental figure at home, kids in the middle and pets at the bottom. So, please cool your jets if you disagree with me when I say that networking marketing is a pyramid scheme.

To set the scene: It was the summer of 2017 and my financial situation was the worst it had ever been. I had submitted a claim to an insurance company for mis-sold insurance a few years before and they repaid me so I had a little bit of cash to play with, but not much and I used it to sign up to this company and pay for physiotherapy. I was in a lot of pain from sciatica which had been making me miserable for two and a half years by that time. The doctor had never once given me a prescription for pain medication and I had not reached the front of the NHS queue for physiotherapy yet. I was also very lonely because being a carer for a disabled family member, doing a distance learning degree and writing online don’t really bring many opportunities to socialise to your door.

So, you can see how I was exactly the kind of person who would be targeted! They saw all the problems I had an assumed I would be vulnerable, not realising that the number of problems a person has does not dictate the strength they have as a person — or the ability to see through bullsh*t.

I signed up because I had heard a lot of good things about the business model. My friend… let’s call her Sally, had been jumping from one network marketing company to the next for a few years and she was a big advocate. The business model didn’t bother me too much. After all, like I said before, isn’t everything in life a pyramid? If I worked really hard, and was consistent, I believed I could get to the top. I still think that’s possible for a small number of people. She said that she was making a great passive income, had met people who would be friends for life and the company was really supportive and rewarded hard work.

Supportive is not the word I would use…

I was selling cosmetics, toiletries, make-up and such things. They were things that most people needed and there were also a few luxury items in the range. I can’t mention the brand, but it was a well-known high street brand that have stores in most towns in the UK. This was their sell-at-home side of the business. Because they were a well-known brand, I knew that people would trust the products and they were likely to be easier to sell.

So, when I signed up and almost immediately had Facebook friend requests from a lot of other women on “the team” I was delighted. This was going to be incredible. I was making new friends already. I looked at their profiles and there were a lot of them in my area, with young kids, and health problems and responsibilities but they were extremely positive and fun on their pages. There was no criticism, no rudeness… they were liquid sunshine.

All that positivity was very seductive. I bought into it. I wanted that. I wanted to be that happy and successful. Who wouldn’t?

Then the wheels came off. Here’s what happened:

I was added to a secret group – that was secret for a reason

All of the team, who had the same upline, were in the secret group I was added to and this was where they told the truth – the whole depressing, honest truth. On their Facebook profiles they were talking themselves and the products up. They were posting pictures from events and parties they hosted which were apparently a huge success, but the truth was nobody showed up to their events. They were empty, they sold nothing and their liquid sunshine from their profiles was thunderstorms and gales in the secret group.

Notifications at three in the morning

I had a stepson who had already had one motorbike accident a couple of years before and I was the official carer for my 93 year old neighbour so I kept my phone on at night in case there was an emergency. The only thing I switched off was the Gmail app and I didn’t have social media apps. But the messaging apps pinged non-stop all night, resulting in me switching off group notifications altogether. I would often forget to switch them back on in the morning meaning I ended up missing out of messages from the upline that were quite important.

The upline was a bully

She messaged me incessantly. The number of times she was on my back in an hour probably equalled the number of times my last 9 to 5 job boss contacted me in a month. I don’t know where this woman learned her people skills. Maybe from Simon Cowell.

She hassled me to sell to friends I didn’t have. She demanded to know why I had only posted about the company once on Facebook that day. She insisted I get in touch with everyone I knew — SEND TO ALL! That’s one of her most used phrases. Sorry, I can’t send to all. I don’t think my dentist wants to buy body lotion from me.

Ultimately, she was suspicious of me. She had seen my blog and knew that I write about everything that happens in my life in an irreverent way. She didn’t like it.

And on a personal level, I simply didn’t like her. I like people who enrich my life, with fun or kindness or knowledge. Although, to be fair, I did learn a lot about my phone’s Do Not Disturb settings thanks to her, so maybe she was enriching my life in that way.

I’m just not a salesperson

The ability to sell, sell, sell is something that I will probably never have. I’m not pushy. It’s not in my nature and I don’t really want to change. If I sell a book to someone, it’s because I’ve been telling them about my life or my work in passing and they’ve taken a genuine interest. I appreciate that. I know I’m never going to be rich this way and I’ve collected a lot of criticisms over the years from business-minded writers who are angry at me wasting my potential, but I am who I am.

I am not the type of person who is going to enjoy success as a salesperson, so network marketing definitely wasn’t for me.

They’re always watching you — and this is what got me kicked out

I’m not kidding. The upline was watching my every move. She used to go through the adverts for the company on Facebook to find potential downlines, mostly from people who had seen the ad and commented that they liked a particular product. Sometimes, on those ads, people would complain about the network marketing side of the company. They would share similar stories to mine and warn people not to get involved.

I liked one of those comments and it got me kicked out.

It didn’t matter that I was meeting my sales targets, or that I had always spoken well of the company in my posts. It didn’t matter that I was showing potential, despite being a natural introvert and not a pushy salesperson. I had liked an honest comment from a stranger on Facebook and it was enough for her to close down my account.

I did ask her about it, because I had around £500 of sales to put through that day, meaning big commission for me and for her, but she got abusive and I had to block her.

So, there you have it. That’s my pyramid scheme story. I got kicked out for a Facebook like. I’ve always been led to believe that these types of businesses are rushing to get people to sign up. They want to sign up as many people as possible. People leave because they didn’t reach targets or they got fed up. Or maybe they went to another company with a similar business model. I managed just a four weeks before they essentially fired me.

I would never do network marketing again, not because the business model is unfair, but because after being in the secret group where everyone told the truth, I know that all these super lovely, really sweet, liquid sunshine people are full of lies and nonsense. And I would always suspect anyone involved in future of doing the same, whether they are or not.

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