Summary

The article emphasizes the importance of accepting life's inherent unfairness to achieve satisfaction and success in one's career and personal life.

Abstract

The article "Achieve Satisfaction in Your Work" discusses the inevitability of life's unfairness and the futility of dwelling on it. The author recalls childhood lessons from his father, who would remind him and his siblings that "No one ever said life was fair," a phrase that initially frustrated the author but later became a source of wisdom. Drawing parallels to Mark Twain's reflections on his father's wisdom, the author suggests that unfairness is a natural part of life, citing examples such as a fisherman catching a fish or a colleague's undeserved promotion. The article encourages readers to adopt a Stoic approach, as exemplified by Marcus Aurelius, to deal with life's challenges without exacerbating them with complaints about fairness. By internalizing the mantra that life is not fair and focusing on practical responses to adversity, one can navigate life's ups and downs more effectively, leading to greater happiness and career success.

Opinions

The author's father provided a philosophical perspective on life's unfairness, which, although initially frustrating, was ultimately seen as valuable advice.
Life's unfairness is compared to natural events and personal misfortunes, suggesting it is an intrinsic part of existence that should not be taken personally.
Complaining about unfairness is viewed as an unnecessary burden that can worsen situations, rather than improve them.
The Stoic philosophy of Marcus Aurelius is presented as a model for dealing with adversity, emphasizing practical actions over lamenting circumstances.
The article suggests that by accepting life's unfairness, individuals can reduce their own suffering and increase their chances of success and happiness.

Achieve Satisfaction in Your Work

No One Said Life Is Fair

Things are this way, and we can deal with them without adding to our burdens by worrying about unfairness.

When I was growing up, my dad had a standard response to my brothers and me whenever one of us complained about the never-ending ways that life was unfair:

No one ever said life was fair.

My dad’s answer used to annoy me no end because it didn’t seem like any kind of answer. “That’s not fair!” we complained, and my dad said, “That’s right.”

With time, I better appreciate the wisdom in this approach.

I am reminded of what Mark Twain once said about his father: “When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”

Is it fair when the fisherman pulls a fish from the sea, or the crow plucks a worm from the field? Is it fair when it rains on your wedding day? When your car gets a flat tire, your train is late, and your flight is canceled? When your incompetent but conniving colleague is promoted before you?

We could expand this list a long time, but I’ll let you fill in the blanks in your mind.

It’s Never Personal

No, it’s not fair. But nor do we have to take it personally.

Things are this way, and we can deal with them without adding to our burdens by worrying about unfairness. We can make things better without first making them worse by complaining about them.

Now later in my own life, I realize my dad was a philosopher at heart. He was trying to pass on to me and my brothers an old message. Here’s how I’ve since heard it from that model Stoic, Marcus Aurelius:

A cucumber is bitter — throw it away. There are briars in the road — turn aside from them. This is enough. Do not add, ‘and why were such things made in the world?’

Marcus Aurelius knew to remind himself of this fact whenever needed. Though he was Emperor of Rome, he needed it every day.

So take this as your own helpful reminder, from Aurelius, my Dad, and me to you: “No one ever said life was fair.”

If you can keep this thought foremost in your mind when bad things happen, chances are you’ll not only be more successful in your career. You’ll probably be happier, too.

Be well.

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An earlier version of this article was previously published in the ACC Docket, the global magazine for the Association of Corporate Counsel.