Never Will I Ever (Again)

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nough.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) be made to feel like my needs should go last.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) <i>put </i>myself last.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) read a terrible book to its conclusion.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) finish a movie I am not enjoying.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) beg someone to stay in my life who wants to leave it.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) watch reality television that glorifies the worst side of our humanity.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) spend a single extra second with anyone who is emotionally abusive to me.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) feel guilty for prioritizing my own physical or mental health.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) make excuses for someone else’s red flags.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) apologize for who I am or how I feel.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) sit quietly while I am disrespected.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) sit quietly as a witness to injustice.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) explain the way I choose to live my life to people committed to misunderstanding it.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) be anything but passionately in love with the life I am creating for myself.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) choose to make things look perfect over being real.</li><li>Never will I ever (again) settle for anything less than a beautiful life and epic love.</li></ul><p id="2bc0">This is my Never Will I Ever (again) list, but it might look like yours, too. With so many polarizing factors in the world, we often forget that we share many human experiences. We fall in love, we get our hearts broken, we dream dreams, and we suffer disappointments. We may have different ideas about how we should live or what we want, but our emotional experiences often converge. If we focused on that more often, we might find a common thread, one strong enough to pull us all together.</p><p id="7f67">Instead, we pull the other threads and watch as the world unravels.</p><p id="5c13">I feel sad for my 20-something self who wanted so much and settled for so little. But the lessons I learned from my experiences were priceless. I entered my thirties newly divorced with a baby and toddler. It was far from the life of my dreams. But it was also the start of <i>creating </i>the life of my dreams.</p><p id="0eeb">That simple act of courage was necessary to become the woman, writer, and even mother I am today. The life I wanted was waiting on the other side of the struggle and

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disappointment. As much as I appreciate what I have, I have a long list of things I’ll never do again. I’m grateful for the lessons learned, but I don’t need to learn them anymore.</p><p id="96fc">I add a lot of random things to the list, experiences that apply to my life and may not resonate for you. Things like “Never will I ever (again) stay for a single second with a man who makes me cry in the grocery store” or “Never will I ever (again) wear something that makes me feel bad about myself”.</p><p id="dca4">It really doesn’t matter what we put on the list. It just matters that we learn from our experiences and begin to intentionally create the kind of lives we don’t regret.</p><div id="ecd7" class="link-block"> <a href="https://psiloveyou.xyz/maybe-not-a-narcissist-57e09e164a62"> <div> <div> <h2>Maybe Not a Narcissist</h2> <div><h3>A Simple Reason We Might Mislabel Our Relationships</h3></div> <div><p>psiloveyou.xyz</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*T-wnYjZLzYq1uJ6M)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="d40b" class="link-block"> <a href="https://psiloveyou.xyz/haunted-by-ghosts-of-partners-past-cjackson82020-d5755744ed8c"> <div> <div> <h2>Haunted by Ghosts of Partners Past</h2> <div><h3>Are past relationships haunting your current one?</h3></div> <div><p>psiloveyou.xyz</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*qxsnlDokgpQOYeWd)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="d52f" class="link-block"> <a href="https://psiloveyou.xyz/love-means-never-having-to-say-sorry-baumrind-jackson-a4665dfa29ed"> <div> <div> <h2>Love Means Never Having to Say Sorry</h2> <div><h3>Seven careless ways we sabotage our relationships</h3></div> <div><p>psiloveyou.xyz</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*kAoZjxK0b5wZz9FH)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

Sometimes we need a manifesto to move on and break cycles.

I’d like to say that I don’t have regrets, that I just have learning experiences, but that’s not entirely true. Some experiences cause enough pain that they necessitate a lifetime of healing. But these days, I do look for the opportunities inside my challenges, and if I make mistakes, at least I no longer make the same ones.

The game Never Have I Ever never really interested me. There’s always been so much I’ve wanted to do, and I feel like the first part of my life was a little boring. I got a late start on my personal bucket list. But I started thinking that I’ve had some experiences I never want to repeat again. Maybe I learn everything the hard way, but I am learning.

Never Will I Ever (Again) isn’t a game. It’s a mantra, a manifesto, and a fierce declaration of personal independence. It’s a note to self on days when our resolve weakens or when we’re tempted to repeat patterns. It’s a reminder of how strong we are, how much we’ve survived, and how we’ll choose to live.

Never will I ever (again) ride shotgun in my own life instead of being the one to call the shots.

Never will I ever (again) sit down to eat at a table where my presence isn’t welcome, only tolerated.

Never will I ever (again) spend time with people who make me feel like I can’t be the truest version of myself.

Never will I ever (again) let anyone convince me that what I want for my life isn’t possible or realistic.

Never will I ever (again) marry someone who doesn’t feel like the luckiest person in the world to get to share their life with me.

Never will I ever (again) let outside standards determine my worth.

Never will I ever (again) consider something I enjoy to be a “guilty pleasure” just because someone else doesn’t get it.

Never will I ever (again) spend time with people who make me feel like I am hard to love.

Never will I ever (again) spend time with people who make me feel like I am either too much or not enough.

Never will I ever (again) be made to feel like my needs should go last.

Never will I ever (again) put myself last.

Never will I ever (again) read a terrible book to its conclusion.

Never will I ever (again) finish a movie I am not enjoying.

Never will I ever (again) beg someone to stay in my life who wants to leave it.

Never will I ever (again) watch reality television that glorifies the worst side of our humanity.

Never will I ever (again) spend a single extra second with anyone who is emotionally abusive to me.

Never will I ever (again) feel guilty for prioritizing my own physical or mental health.

Never will I ever (again) make excuses for someone else’s red flags.

Never will I ever (again) apologize for who I am or how I feel.

Never will I ever (again) sit quietly while I am disrespected.

Never will I ever (again) sit quietly as a witness to injustice.

Never will I ever (again) explain the way I choose to live my life to people committed to misunderstanding it.

Never will I ever (again) be anything but passionately in love with the life I am creating for myself.

Never will I ever (again) choose to make things look perfect over being real.

Never will I ever (again) settle for anything less than a beautiful life and epic love.

This is my Never Will I Ever (again) list, but it might look like yours, too. With so many polarizing factors in the world, we often forget that we share many human experiences. We fall in love, we get our hearts broken, we dream dreams, and we suffer disappointments. We may have different ideas about how we should live or what we want, but our emotional experiences often converge. If we focused on that more often, we might find a common thread, one strong enough to pull us all together.

Instead, we pull the other threads and watch as the world unravels.

I feel sad for my 20-something self who wanted so much and settled for so little. But the lessons I learned from my experiences were priceless. I entered my thirties newly divorced with a baby and toddler. It was far from the life of my dreams. But it was also the start of creating the life of my dreams.

That simple act of courage was necessary to become the woman, writer, and even mother I am today. The life I wanted was waiting on the other side of the struggle and disappointment. As much as I appreciate what I have, I have a long list of things I’ll never do again. I’m grateful for the lessons learned, but I don’t need to learn them anymore.

I add a lot of random things to the list, experiences that apply to my life and may not resonate for you. Things like “Never will I ever (again) stay for a single second with a man who makes me cry in the grocery store” or “Never will I ever (again) wear something that makes me feel bad about myself”.

It really doesn’t matter what we put on the list. It just matters that we learn from our experiences and begin to intentionally create the kind of lives we don’t regret.