My Zombie Mom Has a Fusion Reactor in Her Brain

Summary

The narrative describes a surreal scenario where the protagonist encounters their zombified mother, who has a fusion reactor in her brain, amidst a world where zombies are connected to a mysterious power source.

Abstract

The protagonist recounts a series of bizarre events involving their mother, who, after becoming a zombie, appears to have a fusion reactor in her brain. These events are set against the backdrop of Pyramid Lake, a place with mysterious depths and stories of bodies traveling from Lake Tahoe to Pyramid. The protagonist has had multiple encounters with their mother in unexpected places, including the moon and on a game show, leading to fame and a meme that still circulates decades later. The narrative hints at the protagonist's unconventional livelihood, which involves legal action against content pirates and leveraging their mother's zombified state for financial gain. The text delves into the science fiction realm, discussing the importance of ichor, a substance likened to demon's blood, which is implied to be the key to reversing decay in zombies. The obsession with brains is explained as a means for zombies to maintain their physical integrity by absorbing the vast neural networks of the human brain. The story culminates in the realization that the zombies have discovered a significant source of this power, leading to an impending confrontation and the need to embrace the imminent horror.

Opinions

The protagonist expresses a mix of fear and resignation regarding their mother's zombified condition and her frequent, unexpected reappearances.
There is a sense of dark humor in the protagonist's recounting of their experiences, particularly in their description of profiting from their mother's condition.
The protagonist holds a dim view of content pirates, indicating a belief in the importance of intellectual property rights and the need to teach offenders a lesson.
The text suggests a critical perspective on traditional zombie lore, proposing a new explanation for zombies' fixation on brains involving the restoration of their decaying bodies through neural connections.
There is an underlying tone of impending doom and a call to accept the horrific reality that is about to unfold with the awakening of empowered zombies.

There’s not much time left

The first thing I saw was the horse’s head. A Mustang. He’s at the shore of Pyramid Lake. No one knows how deep the lake is. There are stories of people who drowned at Lake Tahoe in the Sierras, and their bodies have been found in Pyramid 70 miles away.

Some one on a team of divers once ascended from the depths of Pyramid to say, “You don’t want to know what’s down there.”

You bet I don’t. Pretty sure I’m going to find my mother’s zombified body again. Anytime I open a weird door somewhere, she shows up. I was on the moon once, and when I opened the door to go outside, guess who was there?!

It’s pretty wild. It’s not the most useless thing, though.

When mom showed up behind the third door at Let’s Make a Deal, we became famous. There’s still a meme circulating on the Internet eighty years later. And I even get some royalties from it! That’s what I do for a living now. If I need money, I sue a few of these punks who share content to which they don’t have the right to.

Teach them a lesson.

I always make sure to send them a bit of Mom’s face with my thank you note. It’s worse than my cat’s hair. She’s losing skin everywhere and all year round, not only in winter. But as long as I find money, it’s OK because I can get her enough brains to eat and regenerate.

Well, “regenerate,” I mean, as far as a zombie can do that, you know?

It’s all about the ichor, of course. That’s where Frankenstein got it all wrong. Hopeless amateur. Ichor, not Igor. Demon’s blood. That’s the spark you need to fire it up, reverse the decay.

You ever wondered why zombies are so obsessed with brains? Brains, brains, brains… It’s all they think about. Not that they actually think, that is. Just urge, surge, purge.

They don’t want the brains ‘cos they think (not think) they’ll give them some kind of intelligence, consciousness. It’s to do with the neural connections.

Any idea how many synapse relays, how many nodes and links there are in a brain? 100 fucking trillion. That’s what? Ten, eleven aughts right there. Forget the ones. But they count too.

Zombie gets that inside of ’em, that kind of linkage, leverage so to speak, and they just might start to stop the rot. Start, stop, rot? What? Because they’re falling apart, breaking down. Every time they take one of those shambling steps, the ligaments are splitting, the tendons are stretching and blistering like some old lady’s knicker elastic.

But once you get those neural connections kicking in, once you’ve got the fusion rolling cold, they just might keep it together. And then you’ve got…

Shit! That — just that — right there. Look at the fuckers. Ichor! Like I said — they’ve found it. Either that or more brains than would fit in the Smithsonian, Radcliffe Camera or whatever.

It’s going to snap. They’re coming for us. We’ll just have to embrace the horror, my dears. The horror.

Exquisite Corpse with Ann James, Grandma Smillew and Matthew Clapham

My Zombie Mom Has a Fusion Reactor in Her Brain

There’s not much time left