My Writing is Unpredictable

This is a completely unedited piece of work. Only my thoughts written down as I’ve received them. Sorry for any typos.

When I start a blog, I usually start with a title. I have an idea in my head, name it in my title, and go with that inspiration. From there, my creative writing flows like a babbling brook, twisting and turning in my brain. I don’t know where the outcome will end.

Sometimes it ends in this huge epiphany. You know, something very profound. Sometimes my words come out like a babbling word salad that has no rhyme or reason, disconnected from each other in thought.

This style makes my writing a bit painful. It takes a long time to write this way. However, I work with my writing this way because it’s the only way for me to excavate those gold nuggets of my life and the wisdom I’ve received. It’s like when I read Tarot. I don’t have an agenda. I sit and become still. I listen to my intuition. I blurt out the thoughts that are in my head because that’s what is really important.

I don’t “think.” I don’t even know what I might say from moment to the next. I just go with the flow.

I’m sure every writer has their own way of writing, but this is my way. I consider this my art. As an empath, my intuition couples with my art. I work with my empathy to give richness to my writing. I write to evoke emotion and to connect with my reader. Most of the time, I hit the nail on the head.

Not everything can be 100%. That’s okay.

This doesn’t happen ALL the time. Sometimes there are specific points I need to make about a life circumstance. Even then, I use a bit of my intuition to bring my story full circle. I have to bring in a sprinkle of my empathic self, otherwise it’s canned and dull.

My main writing tool is my empathy.

I have bad habits working this way with my writing. The part I hate the most is editing. I usually pass over very important typos after I publish. I’ll usually go back and edit, then kick myself when I find some mistake that are so blatantly obvious. It’s a bad habit, but I have to publish before it’s clean, otherwise I’ll keep editing and never hit the publish button.

I once sent a piece of work to The Writing Cooperative. They sent it back with a reply that my work needed more editing. Dammit!

I want to be an excellent writer. However, I’ve never taken a writing class. I’m not a professional writer. Even in college my writing lessons were not creative. I was burdened with nursing care plans, and analyzing the readings of certain theories or philosophies. To me, that’s not creative. That’s a type of writing that makes you use your brain, not your heart.

I’ve learned correct grammar only through trial and error and a grammar program. It turns out, how you talk isn’t necessarily how you write. Periods and commas, semicolons and dashes, they all make a difference in how you make your point come across.

I’ve wanted to find a writing mastermind group. Or a mentor. Or even someone who’s compatible with me to help each other perfect each other’s writing.

I’ve reached out and failed so far.

I know if I keep trying, I’ll find my niche with other writers.

I may never get rich, or even making a living this way, and I’ve come to terms with that. But I must keep writing, because it’s my art and my soul. I’m so happy when I get done with a blog and hit publish. Even if it has typos. I imagine it’s similar to brushing that last stroke on canvas, or getting the lighting to shine perfectly on your subject when you snap that picture, or molding the clay figure in front of you into how you envisioned.

I keep writing to get that sense of completing my heart when I’ve put out my words in a way that’s satisfying to me.

Now, if I could find a group to share this with, my life would be even richer than it is now.