My Weight Loss Injection Diary: Understanding My Why

It’s important to understand our internal motivation.

At first, I noticed a lot of people in my life losing weight. I didn’t comment on it. It’s none of my business, but I started hearing the real reason behind why the weight was dropping. Weight loss injections were the secret ingredient that people were reluctant to share.

Why is that? Because people aren’t just judgmental about weight and body image; they’re equally judgmental about the way we choose to lose weight. Everyone has an opinion, and we’re all sick of hearing it.

My weight was never judged as acceptable. When I was younger, I was asked often if I had an eating disorder. I was teased for being thin, called skinny and flat-chested, and told to eat a burger. It happened all the time. I grew up in a culture that called normal-sized actresses overweight and constantly fed us a diet of unrealistic body images.

In my twenties, I began to gain weight. A woman at work suggested I do crunches. Another patted my stomach and asked if I was pregnant. Looking back, I wasn’t at all overweight, but I thought I was. Even though I had been feeling good about myself, I would go out in public, and some woman would remind me that there was something lacking about my appearance. I had been too skinny. Now, I was told I needed to be that skinny again. No one was ever happy.

When I got pregnant, I enjoyed the expansion of my body. Not the part where I couldn’t sleep at night or felt my abdomen ripping itself apart. What I enjoyed was the acceptance of being able to have a bigger body without anyone telling me how to shrink it. I loved seeing the changes, but later in my pregnancy, the commentary started again on how I should work to get my body back and how could I be sure I wasn’t carrying twins. Even in my new form, incubating another human being, someone had something to say about how I looked doing it.

After two pregnancies and childbirth experiences, my body was forever changed. I had stretch marks, a c-section scar, and diastasis recti — where my abdominal muscles no longer held together. And I had to constantly deal with commentary on my body. Sadly, most of the commentary came from other women.

My children are now older, and I feel like I’m the healthiest I’ve ever been. Not the thinnest. But certainly the strongest. I have more endurance and strength than I’ve ever had before. But if I’m honest, I’m not always happy with my body. The constant outside chatter about it didn’t help that feeling.

The Why of My Weight Loss Journey

I grew up with a toxic body image and a negative diet culture. I’ve never been a fan of it, but that doesn’t mean it hasn’t impacted my thoughts and perception of myself. When I first heard of people taking Ozempic and Wegovy, I didn’t think positively about it. I had my own judgments — judgments that reflected my disgust with our weight-obsessed culture. But then, something changed.

I’m in that pre-menopausal part of my life where weight comes on easier than it goes off. I also take antidepressants and a birth control, which can contribute to some weight gain. There are factors that make it difficult to lose weight — from age to genetics. And I got really tired of making all the right choices and not seeing it reflected in my body.

Of course, I was getting stronger. I had more endurance. I was reaching athletic performance goals. But I was also putting on weight. I didn’t like how my clothes fit. I didn’t like the thought that I could keep gaining but couldn’t manage to lose no matter what I did.

Then, a friend posted an image of herself before and after weight loss. She’d recently had a baby, and I didn’t think much about it at first. I know she’s struggled with her weight before and worked to improve her body image. But as I was reading her story, it struck me in a new light. She was openly talking about her experience with weight loss injections — something many people shy away from. Instead of judging it, I began to wonder if I was looking at it wrong.

Medication can be a resource to help us when nothing else is working. It’s how I came to be on antidepressants in the first place. I couldn’t manage my chronic illness alone. I needed help. What if weight loss was the same way?

So, I booked a consultation and ended up getting prescribed semaglutide for weight loss. They are injections I will be taking weekly for 10 weeks. I’m in the second week of the journey, and I have a few thoughts.

The Shots

I am self-injecting my weight loss medication. At first, I was nervous about that. I’m not afraid of needles, but I don’t enjoy pain either. Luckily, the needles are small, and none of my injections have hurt. For added confidence, I watched a video on the injections to make sure I was doing it right. Finding an injection site was easy, and injecting it was quick and painless. That might not be everyone’s experience, but it has been mine so far.

The Diet

I had a healthy diet before, but I am even more careful with my diet now. I find that some foods will cause side effects. They aren’t always unhealthy, processed foods either. Something as simple as eating an orange caused an unpleasant reaction. Instead, I increase my protein, watch my sugar intake (even natural kinds like with oranges), increase my water intake, and count my carbs. It’s not much different from the way I was eating before, but I don’t often feel hungry between meals. Now that I’m more careful about how I eat, I haven’t really had any other side effects.

The Exercise

Although I haven’t participated in any formal exercise in the last couple of weeks, I have had more energy than before. I’ve been doing manual labor in my garden, that’s equivalent to what I would normally do in my home gym. I feel like I have the energy to do things I would have put off before. Exercise is an essential component of weight loss, and the energy boost is a big help.

The Weight Loss

I’m down two pounds, which isn’t much at this stage, but it is progress. It is a normal, healthy amount of weight loss over the last 10 days. The doctor suggested I could lose as much as 20 pounds before the end of my 10 weeks. I don’t feel as bloated as I did before, and my clothes seem to fit more comfortably. Still, it’s early days, and I’m not expecting miracles.

I’m not sharing how much I weigh or what my goal weight is. I feel like that’s triggering for eating disorders, and it actually provides an unhealthy comparison. People can be all different shapes and sizes and still weigh the same. My goals are personal, but I will offer that they are within a healthy range. I’m not trying to be high school skinny, but I would like to get back to the size where I felt the best about myself.

Why the Why Matters

The “why” of weight loss matters. If we’re just doing it for external validation, it’s a futile exercise. It so rarely comes, and even when it does, it’s not as satisfying — or as lasting — as internal validation. We can certainly make changes for other people, but we can’t expect those sorts of changes to stick.

It even matters if the “why” is that we’re trying to fit into an accepted cultural norm. Body aesthetics come to us in all forms of media, and wanting to fit in can be a strong motivator — particularly if our sense of self-worth is fragile. It’s a reason, but is it the best one?

At the end of the day, my why is that I don’t feel as comfortable in my body as I once did. I want to go back to fitting into my clothes well and not feeling self-conscious about every single photo someone takes of me. Plus, I know the health risks associated with weight gain, and I want to be as healthy as possible as I age. I know health isn’t a number on the scale, but I also know that weight gain can be associated with several medical conditions, including heart disease, respiratory issues, and type II diabetes.

For me, this isn’t a long-term solution. It’s a short-term aid to help me get where I want to be so that I can better maintain it. I know the work won’t end in 10 weeks. I have no intention of being in a battle with my body, but I do know that weight loss injections can help women struggling with hormonal changes manage weight gain. I see it as a tool. That’s my why.

In Summary

I don’t know if I’ll reach my goals. I’m giving it a 10-week trial. Still, I continue to ask questions and to think critically about the process. There are factors that should be considered when electing to use a weight loss injection.

If this sounds like something that interests you, talk to a trusted healthcare provider. I’m not a doctor or medical expert and cannot advise you whether or not weight loss injections are right for you. I can only share my experience and offer some insight into the process.

So far, my experience has been largely positive. I like the boost in energy. I feel like I’m doing something productive for my health, and it’s helped me think more critically about the way I eat and exercise. That’s helping me create healthier habits that will last long after my injection journey is over.

Next time, I’ll write about some of the ethical questions I have about the weight loss prescription medications and what I’m discovering along my own journey.