My Vision for 2023 as the New Editor-in-Chief of The Virago
Every woman has a right to tell her story
I’ll never forget the day I hit “send” on an article I had been working on for months and was submitting for publication.
It was the first time I was going to share my story of escaping an abusive marriage to a man who only at the end of it would be diagnosed a narcissist.
Like so many others, I failed to recognize the signs of abuse because he wasn’t hitting me. He didn’t scream or call me names.
What he did was so much worse.
Over the course of sixteen years, and through tactics such as love-bombing, intermittent reinforcement, and gaslighting — hallmarks of narcissistic abuse — he ever so slowly stripped me of me.
I was no longer the author of my own life. He controlled the narrative. He wrote my story.
He stole my voice.
Once I escaped, I became determined to get it back.
And I used the written word to do it.
It’s crazy to think how powerful a word can be. A simple sentence that leads to another, then a paragraph, then a conclusion.
And when those words include our personal stories, when a written piece is our heart poured onto the page, the impact on not only ourselves but those who read our words is immeasurable.
With written words, we come together. We find closure, understanding, and acceptance. We are seen and validated.
We are heard.
And as a woman, as an abuse survivor, there is no greater gift.
So now I want to share that gift.
This is my goal for 2023 as editor-in-chief of The Virago:
- To uplift and nurture the voices of women who deserve to be heard
- To provide the tools and support for women who want to tell their story but are unsure of where to start
- To teach women how to take their power back through the written word
- To showcase, promote, and make space for women writers
- To create a diverse and inclusive community of women writers and readers
- To help women not only find their voices but raise them
As a lifelong writer, I understand the journey of a word from a thought in our head, out our fingers, and onto the page.
I also understand all the roadblocks that are found between each step, which is what stops so many from writing at all.
Women have often said to me, “But I’m not a writer.” Yet they still feel the yearning to write.
To them I say, none of us are born writing. It’s a skill like any other skill. It requires practice, patience, and the ability to try and try again.
And for a woman who has a story within her that needs to come out, it requires the burning. That feeling which sits heavily in your soul, begging to be released.
It’s that which putters around in your subconscious, reminding you every so often it’s still there.
The voice within.
That wants to get out.
I promise you this, you will never regret freeing the words inside of you.
I’ve never heard a woman say, “I wish I would have kept everything in.”
Not sure where to start? Your story is huge, after all, and important so what part of it do you tell first?
Here’s my advice:
Start with what’s choking you. What’s in your throat that makes it hard to breathe right now? What’s at the top and ready to go?
Start there.
Don’t overthink it. Don’t let self-doubt get in the way of your words. Let them come out, fall out, even vomit them out if necessary.
Just write.
Open the door, open the portal, open your throat.
And let the words take it from there.
Then I’ll be here for the next leg of your journey: the journey to the light.
Where your readers are waiting.
This isn’t the easy part by any means because it requires practice, along with a willingness to learn the ins and outs of what it takes to bring your words to a reader’s eyes.
There are rules to follow, techniques to learn, and tools to use.
That’s what I’ll be here for.
Because I believe every woman has a right to tell her story. And I wouldn’t be the woman I am today without having told mine.
Now I want to help women tell theirs.
So let’s write.
Years ago in college, my creative writing professor explained how all of my words were of no use if I didn’t have the tools to express them.
He said: Imagine you have a beautiful Ferrari in your garage. If you don’t have the keys, what good is it?
This is my goal as editor-in-chief of The Virago for 2023.