My Month of Gratitude
Simple. Positive. Life changing.
Gratitude has become a trendy buzz word in the past year and I fear the public won’t see it as anything more. I know it’s edgy and cool to be skeptical of anything that doesn’t mirror the cynical outlook many have come to embrace but we mustn’t forget that some things are popular for good reason. If it will have a positive impact on our lives, it shouldn’t matter that a practice has become ‘mainstream’.
Everyone I follow online was telling me to start a gratitude journal and it became one of those things I did every day in the imaginary alternate universe where I am perfect. One day, after a classic emotional breakdown (triggered by school-related stress and financial dread), I decided I need to tackle my problems from the inside out. Most of the anguish in my life comes from negative framing and ruminating on all the things I can’t control, patterns I know are very unhealthy — but also very changeable.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy or CBT, a counseling intervention I’ve become quite familiar with in my schooling, suggests that thoughts, actions, and emotions are connected and if we can adjust one of these things positively, the other things can be improved. If I re-frame my thoughts, my actions can change and so can my emotional state. I thought this would be very valuable for me and my experimental month of gratitude proved this assumption correct. Reflecting on the parts of life I’m grateful for changed my thoughts and consequently, my feelings and actions for the better. I would never want to suggest a person in need experiment with mental health interventions without professional help; however, if you are simply looking for ways to make your life a little happier and less stressful, I think you should experiment away provided there are no pathological issues. Practicing gratitude has been nothing but positive for me and it is so simple and quick that I, a naturally inconsistent person, had no trouble keeping it up. Here are a few things I’ve learned that I think could help you along your journey of self-improvement.
There’s Good In The Shitty Days Too
Though this month wasn’t the worst I’ve had, there were definitely some shitty days. I’ve cried, I’ve worried and I’ve let my imperfections get the better of me. Looking back through my journal entries, I don’t see what made me cry or worry and I don’t see my small failures. Instead, I read about the good weather and my boyfriend helping around my apartment. Everyday was good in one way or the other. I’ve learned to look at the big picture and I realize it’s never all bad. Taking accountability for how I choose to frame any given situation in my mind has helped me discover how powerful it feels to let go and allow positivity to flow into my life. Positivity is all around and it belongs to all of us.
My Relationships Feel More Positive
As I searched for unique moments of gratitude each day, I noticed that the people in my life came up a lot. Their gestures ranged from small favors like taking my garbage out to helping me make Christmas cakes to buying me exciting gifts. Remembering how my loved ones contribute to my happiness has helped me avoid the dangerous habit of taking them for granted. To my delight, I noticed myself voicing gratitude to others more freely and even if they aren’t keeping gratitude journals, I have noted my loved ones being more vocal about how grateful they are for me. The result is a beautiful exchange of joy and satisfaction. Though I still struggle to reach out to everyone in my life often enough, I feel that those I do have the privilege of seeing every day now have a happier, healthier version of me by their side.
Work Is More Enjoyable
Practicing gratitude has helped me stop and think throughout the day to search for moments that ‘spark joy’. A lot of us spend a significant amount of time at work but unfortunately, it’s often so easy to focus on the stressors associated with this part of the day. I work with children during the week so my job is messy, chaotic and tiresome. My job is also fun, creative, rewarding and it is the source of my ability to provide abundance for myself. I live in a cute and cozy apartment, I can feed myself and my cat, I can do fun things with my significant other — all because of my job. I can also play a positive role in the lives of children and nurture their creation of a positive identity. I remember the value and importance of my job and I am grateful for being a part of a company that cares about others.
My work life hasn’t always been as favorable as I feel it is now but I believe the way in which I coped with my previous situation, focusing on the good, facilitated the flow of greater things. It could have been because I was more open to opportunities that came my way. Maybe I’ve become more aligned with the universe. Perhaps a bit of both? Either way, I’m convinced that continuing my new habit will only bring more professional satisfaction into my life as it has in other areas.
When I was reflecting on my month of gratitude there was a long list of benefits I wanted to share. The three points I’ve listed above do not begin to demonstrate how deeply enriched I feel having discovered this amazing practice. If there’s anything I want you to take away from this account of my gratitude journey, it’s that we all wield more control over our happiness than we’re taught. How we choose to frame our everyday experience has such a huge impact on our quality of life and although work is often required, we have full power over it.
By simply taking two minutes at the end of the day to acknowledge and give thanks for my good fortune, I’ve slowly shifted my world view. Instead of the anxiety I normally feel at the start of the year, I’m excited to see what 2020 brings. I trust that the year will be full of opportunity and prosperity for all of us as long as we see it and claim it.