Summary

The author, E. Katherine Kottaras, describes her and her daughter's shared love for thrift store shopping, contrasting it with her late mother's aversion to second-hand clothing, and reflects on the financial, ecological, and spiritual value of their thrift store experiences.

Abstract

E. Katherine Kottaras explores the generational differences in attitudes towards thrift shopping, detailing her mother's disdain for used clothing due to perceived uncleanliness and the possibility of wearing clothes of the deceased. In contrast, Kottaras and her daughter find joy and a spiritual connection in the activity, appreciating the financial savings and environmental benefits of buying recycled clothes. They engage in a trance-like hunt for unique finds, bonding over the adventure and the thrill of discovery. Kottaras reminisces about her mother's love for garage sales and rescuing discarded items, drawing a parallel between these memories and her own tradition with her daughter. The article underscores the importance of spending time together, the joy of shared experiences, and the legacy of family bonds through the lens of thrift shopping.

Opinions

The author's mother disliked thrift stores, considering them musty and chaotic, and was particularly averse to the idea of wearing clothes that may have belonged to deceased individuals.
The author values thrift shopping for its financial benefits, especially in the context of rising inflation and the limitations imposed by the pandemic.
Thrift shopping is seen as an environmentally friendly alternative to fast fashion, reducing the ecological footprint.
The author and her daughter experience a spiritual and trance-like connection while thrift shopping, treating it as a treasure hunt.
The activity is not just about finding affordable clothing but also about the intangible joy and bonding experience it provides.
The author's daughter has a contrasting view to her grandmother, finding the idea of wearing clothes that could have belonged to someone who has passed away to be intriguing rather than off-putting.
The author believes that her mother would have appreciated her daughter's irreverent perspective on wearing second-hand clothes.
The author emphasizes the importance of the time spent with her daughter, viewing thrift shopping as a way to cherish the gift of shared experiences and family traditions.

My Mom Hated Thrift Stores

But my daughter and I can spend hours hunting for bargains. For us, it’s a spiritual experience.

I don’t always take bathroom selfies, but when I do, it’s of my thrift store finds. This sweater was seven bucks.

My mom hated thrift stores.

Antique stores were acceptable, as were antiques, partly because her sister, my aunt, was an antique dealer. Garage sales were also acceptable, and even fun for my mom. We’d spend Saturday mornings driving around the south suburbs of Chicago searching for reusable junk. My mom also loved picking up discarded items from people’s trash; she salvaged wrought iron chairs for years as well as a huge collection of LPs that moved with us all the way to L.A. but then warped in the garage. (Oh, to have those in good condition today!)

But clothes were gross to her, especially clothes found at thrift stores. She hated the musty chaos as well as the idea that we were possibly wearing dead people’s clothes.

Last week, I tried on a sweater at Anthropologie that cost $180. Yesterday, I bought a sweater at Out of the Closet that cost $7.

So yes, there is the financial value of shopping for clothes at thrift stores, for sure. With inflation costs skyrocketing and the public gathering limits of the pandemic, I haven’t really been shopping for clothes that much over the past few years.

There’s also the ecological footprint of fast fashion vs. recycled clothes.

But there’s something else, too — something almost spiritual to thrift store shopping, especially when I’m with my 15-year old daughter.

When she and I enter the thrift store, we go into a zone — it’s almost trance-like. Double-masked, shopping cart ready, we are on a mission.

I think of the chapter in The Omnivore’s Dilemma when Michael Pollan describes learning how to hunt for mushrooms in the forest.

He writes:

But that’s apparently how it goes with hunting mushrooms: You have to get your eyes on, as hunters will sometimes put it.

We get our eyes on. We hunt. On our journey to find the best bargains, we also discover ridiculous t-shirts that say things like “Ask Me About My Butthole” and “I Just Farted.” We imagine crazy parties where we could wear pink sequin jackets with lime green sequin skirts. We also score fantastic finds like t-shirts that say “Book Nerd” and “Good Witch” and $12 jackets that normally run anywhere from $40 to $80 (yes, both of us found perfect winter coats — hers is a Roxy, mine is a Tek Gear.)

We pick out $9 hoodies and $4 sweaters and $1 shorts for each other, trying to guess at what fashion choices the other might make.

Sometimes we guess right.

My mom and I had other shared traditions, and while she would never step inside a thrift store, I can see that her spirit somehow lives on in these journeys that my daughter and I share when we do.

My mom and I loved to spend time together. She was my best friend, my confidant, my number one cheerleader. It’s the gift of time spent together that I can see matters the most; the thrift store — the bargain hunting — it’s financially and ecologically worth it, yes, but it’s also an excuse for my daughter and me to revel in this gift.

We are together, hunting and laughing and imagining and finding. It’s a shared experience that provides both affordable and intangible joy.

When I told my daughter that my mother — her grandmother, who passed away when she was a baby — hated doing the very thing we love to do together (and why), she said:

But the idea of wearing dead people’s clothes is cool!

My mom may have hated thrift stores, but I know she would have giggled at, and truly appreciated my daughter’s irreverence.

So there’s that, too.

E. Katherine Kottaras holds an M.A. in English and an M.S. in Kinesiology with a focus on Integrative Wellness, and she is a writer and teacher, having worked at the middle, high school, and community college levels for over two decades. She is a registered yoga teacher, personal trainer, and health coach while also living with invisible illnesses and neurodivergence, and she is passionate about mindfulness, bodily self-determination, and health equity. As the queer daughter of an immigrant, Katherine believes that holistic and inclusive approaches to healing and growth should be accessible to all.

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